I have been Hiding.....

WEll, Confessions here. I have stayed away from the board for awhile now and it is time to fess up. I need some encouragement. I went through a very bad bout of severe depression and the meds along with the depression caused me to gain the dreaded weight. I can't seem to get it back into control again. I am so ashamed but I know alot of it isn't my fault. I ended up gaining 25 pounds but have lost 10 again. I don't feel good about it all. It is just causing more depression and it is a vicious cycle. I have severe problems with constipation and I am on drugs for that also but it really isn't helping...any suggestions from anyone would be wonderful. This has been a real struggle for me lately and I am not sure what to do. I love you all and have missed you all a bunch. Help... Hugs, Betsy

ah Betsy, I have missed you so much. I thought you would have been at the lunch on Saturday, I was looking for you. You know, we are just doing the best we can do. Don't kick yourself over this. Get back to basics, that's what I always hear. I'm sorry you are struggling, love you Betsy, donna

Oh Donna, I have missed you too. Wanted to come Saturday but just couldn't face you guys...last time was bad enough. I know I will make it but it has been tough. Life gets us sometimes. I knew I could count on my OH angels.....Thanks for being there. Hugs, Betsy

Oh Betsy, I have been there. I am so... very sorry for your pain and what you have been through. Everyone has bad times - please don't feel ashamed. We'll all go through something at one point or another, and yours just came now. It's okay. Everyone understands, and wants to support, love and help you. Please keep your faith, and just follow the basics you already know, and the rest of the weight will come off. Last week was a terrible time for me, and there were times when I really thought I wouldn't get through, and might even die. (Long, nightmarish story...) I learned, yet again, that we CAN get through a day at a time, sometimes an hour at a time, if we keep our faith and trust in God, and turn to our dearest friends for support. He will help you get back on track. Also, I have had terrible probs with constipation since the surgery - what are you taking? I'm looking for solutions too - especially after 2 weeks ago when I thought I might have another bowel obstruction and swelled and hurt so much I was terrified. I'm so done with this! If you figure out a good way to deal with it, please let me know! Know that you are loved, and that you're not alone, Crystal

Crystal, What a sweet response. Thank you for your support. I have done everything with the constipation....Zelnorm, Benefiber, prunes, cashews, stool softeners.....still like concrete! LOL. Everytime I eat I bloat up like I am 9 months pregnant! It is awful. I sure hope it gets better. I have tried everything. Nothing seems to work quite well enough....the above helps but still not normal. What were your symptoms when you had an obstruction? Maybe that is my problem along with everything else...hehe...Thanks again for your response. Hugs, Betsy

Hey Betsy... about the prob... when I had a real bowel obstruction I was nauseated consistently until they knocked me out for surgery - almost 18 hours of pure torture. I've had problems every since I had the WLS. For about the last 3 months I was in the "concrete" phase you described. Then two weeks ago a combination of things happened - I had PS and was on narcotics, wasn't able to exercise, decided to stop taking SS's w/lax because I read what they can do long-term and got scared, etc. Everything combined and I was in a bad way - swelling like you described, and then already feeling so... tight from the PS I literally thought I would split in half. For 3 days I used the most powerful enemas and suppositories - it took 3 DAYS for anything to happen - and that's scary when they say they're supposed to work in 1-5 nminutes, and you're just sitting there waiting and twiddling your thumbs. Finally I was inspired to do my surgeon's pre-op bowel cleansing regimen - so I did liquids all day, then at 1 pm drank the nasty stuff that tastes like ocean water, mixed in water, then later in the day used a glycerin suppository. And finally, the dam broke and all hell broke loose! LOL! I can laugh now, but I was crying then, because I was so grateful! Ever since then I've been taking the SS's w/lax every night, and so far, no concrete - I turned a corner, so to speak! If something doesn't happen every single day, I use a glycerin suppository. I'm so scared of going back. So, I know this is very personal, but I can completely empathize with you, and I hope this helps. Try it - you might like it! As far as a long-term solution, I'm heading to my PCP next week for a desperation talk! Hugs back at ya, Crystal

Hey Betsy, Glad to see you are back. We are here to support each other and you should not hide from us. We are the ones who are here to help you without judgement. I would just like to make 2 recommendations to you...1. Fruit. I notice myself that when I cut back on the fruit, I cut back on the trips to the bathroom if you know what I mean. I eat lots of melons, berries, as well as jarred peaches and pears because the fresh ones are a bit hard for me. Anyway, I also drink lots of 100% juice. While I have virtually no tolerance for white sugar I have virtually no problems with 100% juice and I drink lots of it...If I don't want the full flavor or calories I mix with water. I drink at least one glass of juice almost every day. 2. Check with your doctor about the meds. I have a problem more with anxiety and obsessing about things so my doc recommended meds (I have been going to therapy for over a year and we are kinda stuck at this point.) Anyway, my doctor is aware of my surgery and made a specific point to give me a drug that does not have weight gain as a side effect. He told me that many of the drugs do cause weight gain. A friend of mine (physically fit for life guy) gained 20+ pounds in a couple of months on psych drugs. They can really wreak havok on someone who has had a lifelong struggle with weight. My doctor gave me Klonopin (however u spell it). I take a very small dose but he said that drug will not cause weight gain. He said that if he gave me something with weight gain as a side effect he would be setting me up. Anyway, research your drugs because simply changing your meds may help. Anyway, hope I was able to help a little with all my rambling. Good luck girl and no more hiding! Hugs Christine

Hi Sweetie...Thanks for the advice...I talked with my doctor about changing meds but she said they all cause weight gain and right now I need the meds....I am also on the Clonopin...on top of the other antidepressants....(guess I am a mess ) Anyway, the fruit makes sense and I will try to get more in on a daily basis. Thanks again for your response and I love and miss ya bunches... Hugs, Betsy

Betsy, Here is a great big hug to you. Please don't be ashamed. Depression is nothing to be ashamed about. You know we are here for you and Lord knows we are not judgemental ! I love this board. Jennifer

Hi Jennifer...Thank you so much for your response. I guess I needed to hear that. It has certainly been a struggle the last couple months and scary how quickly this weight came back. Now that I have heard others say the meds are the main culprit has really helped me accept it. At least it isn't all my fault. Thanks again for being here for me....I knew I could count on my OH angels.. Hugs, Betsy