Sex After WLS
I wanted to start this thread because I'm curious to know what everyone is finding after WLS. We are all sexual beings and I have to believe that part of why we had WLS is because we want to look attractive (to ourselves and to others).
How many of you have found that since your WLS your libido has increased? I still find it amazing how much mine has. It's almost like I'm 18 again (okay, not that bad but still).
Anyway, this is a good forum to discuss all such things and I hope you'll all share your experiences, your thoughts, and your fears/desires in here.
Sean
How many of you have found that since your WLS your libido has increased? I still find it amazing how much mine has. It's almost like I'm 18 again (okay, not that bad but still).
Anyway, this is a good forum to discuss all such things and I hope you'll all share your experiences, your thoughts, and your fears/desires in here.
Sean
I thought about that but then the idea hit me that it might be better to start this thread here in the Utah forum so that we can actually discuss it with people who live in the same basic environment as we do. If it doesn't work here, I'll move it but I have faith in the people in Utah that they can open up and be honest about the changes they experience after weight loss surgery in this area. How it affects their marriage, their relationships, their libido, whether or not they find themselves making decisions about sex that they never thought they'd make, etc.
Ok.... well I will start by saying a few things. I really haven't noticed MUCH of a change when it comes to sex after WLS. But after I had lost quite a bit of weight I had noticed that "certain" things were ALOT easier. I can VISUALLY SEE alot more thats going on, if ya know what I mean *wink*. Which is nice, because seeing things turns me on just that much more. I use to hate riding top because it was hard to do at 300+ lbs. But it's much more tolerable now. It's easier to shave.... hehehe. And we have tried new positions that we wouldn't have been able to do before I had lost surgery. That is all I can think of right now. But as far as an increase in my libido I don't think that has taken place. I think it's just about where it is as before I had surgery. I was a baaaaaad horn dog..... (as bad as a teenage boy, or just any man I guess) when I was younger. But that has changed now that I've gotton older and more mature. Anyway, thats all I've got to say about this subject. Let's hear from everyone else..... ANYONE? I'm curious too!
Okay, so I have a little time to write so I'm going to address this forum. I hope others will open up and share as well. Thank you Julia for sharing yours. The way I look at it is that these are things everyone is going to go through and it's always good to know there are others out there.
By the way, I love Imogen Heap music. I just had to say that.
(1) Ability. I've always been good at pleasing orally. It really comes down to truly understanding what you're trying to accomplish. I've also always know how to please the traditional way but in the past I haven't been able to perform well in that area. Part of it has been staying erect when I was over 400 lbs. And that problem wasn't a physical one, it was a mental one because I was always concerned about various things due to my weight. Now that I've lost my weight, performance in that area is amazingly better.
(2) Stamina. I don't even really need to address this, do I? I'm young enough to enjoy my new found stamina but old enough that I get the benefit of staying power due to being a bit older and be able to use that to my benefit (if you know what I mean).
(3) Libido. OMG! What can I say. Before surgery when I got turned on, I got turned on. That hasn't changed. What has changed is the intensity of my sexual feelings and the fact that it's pretty much all the time. Obviously I am wise enough to control it but yet use it when it is beneficial.
I don't want anyone to think I'm running around just having sex because I'm not. I'm at an age where that doesn't appeal to me anymore. But I'm also far (far) from being a prude. I LOVE this new side to myself. The fact that I can be on top and I'm not wheezing like an old man, that I can hold myself up with my arms (think about it) and that I can go for a long time.
I will say though that one of the things I know some people run into is when their libido gets turned on high and suddenly they are noticed by other people and are able to enter into the world of sexuality to an extent they really weren't before, it's easy to get carried away and this has caused a lot of problems for a lot of people. Be very careful and use a controlled approach. But also, ENJOY!!!
I hope everyone will share with us in this forum.
Sean
By the way, I love Imogen Heap music. I just had to say that.
(1) Ability. I've always been good at pleasing orally. It really comes down to truly understanding what you're trying to accomplish. I've also always know how to please the traditional way but in the past I haven't been able to perform well in that area. Part of it has been staying erect when I was over 400 lbs. And that problem wasn't a physical one, it was a mental one because I was always concerned about various things due to my weight. Now that I've lost my weight, performance in that area is amazingly better.
(2) Stamina. I don't even really need to address this, do I? I'm young enough to enjoy my new found stamina but old enough that I get the benefit of staying power due to being a bit older and be able to use that to my benefit (if you know what I mean).
(3) Libido. OMG! What can I say. Before surgery when I got turned on, I got turned on. That hasn't changed. What has changed is the intensity of my sexual feelings and the fact that it's pretty much all the time. Obviously I am wise enough to control it but yet use it when it is beneficial.
I don't want anyone to think I'm running around just having sex because I'm not. I'm at an age where that doesn't appeal to me anymore. But I'm also far (far) from being a prude. I LOVE this new side to myself. The fact that I can be on top and I'm not wheezing like an old man, that I can hold myself up with my arms (think about it) and that I can go for a long time.
I will say though that one of the things I know some people run into is when their libido gets turned on high and suddenly they are noticed by other people and are able to enter into the world of sexuality to an extent they really weren't before, it's easy to get carried away and this has caused a lot of problems for a lot of people. Be very careful and use a controlled approach. But also, ENJOY!!!
I hope everyone will share with us in this forum.
Sean
Baby Blues
on 6/9/09 2:29 am - Roy, UT
on 6/9/09 2:29 am - Roy, UT
Sorry I'm so late getting in the discussian...but just had to chime in.
After getting permission from hubby, I joined 2 sites dedicated to swinging.
Yup. My sex drive increased so much I had to find someone to keep up.
Who knew it would unleash something.
xox
T.
After getting permission from hubby, I joined 2 sites dedicated to swinging.
Yup. My sex drive increased so much I had to find someone to keep up.
Who knew it would unleash something.
xox
T.
I'm selfish, impatient, and a little insecure. I make mistakes. I am out of control and at times hard to handle, but if you can't handle me at my worst...then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best. ---Marilyn Monroe
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