Burnt out..... now what???

I am 18 months out and I already miss the honeymoon period !!!!

We had a company lunch catered today - fajitas from Taco Cabana.  I got in line and got my plate and the woman behind me snickered and said "watch Sarah get 3 beans, 2 grains of rice and declare she is full after she eats them"  I wish !!!  I went from the fattest woman in my hall to tied with the skinniest so I get some snarly remarks sometimes.  

I passed up the beans, rice, flour tortillas and chips and put some beef and chicken fajita meat on my plate, poured some cheese queso on top and put a dab of guacamole on the corner.  May not have been low fat, but it was good in the protein dept.  I went back later and got some more meat and chicken and saved in the fridge because by 3:00 I knew I would be hungry again (and I was).  I remember when I went all day on 3 tiny meals - no snacks.  I can get by until lunch w/o a snack but not 3 pm and 9 pm.

One way I deal with not obsessing over food is eating the same things over and over.  Some people can't do that but I don't mind and it frees me up from having to think about it.

Also the weekend splurge/weekday cut back really works.  I was a co-op student in college to help pay my way so I was working full time every other semester.  While at school I never gained weight because I lived off campus and bicycled in every day.  When I was working I had to watch it more closely and that was what I did.  I ate very small healthy portions during the week and on weekends ate whatever I wanted and was able to maintain between 118-122 lbs.

So many smart ladies have already given so many good answers for you. The only thing I can think to tell you is to maybe really get focused on other things. Get involved in something else that is not surrounded by food. We all know that when we are happy we eat. When we are sad we eat., Your life is so full from what I can see on all your posts, so I bet it will not be hard to get busy doing something that makes you happy. Something that you find joy in. Good for you on recognizing these issues now rather than later. As we all know that just because you don't try to fix these issues, the won't go away. They only get worse. Hugs to you. We are all here for you.

Did I tell everyone I love reading the Texas forum better than all the others? There is some real support here. Thanks to everyone for being so supportive!

I am far from maintaince time..only 10 weeks out, but I am listening and taking notes.

Medicfem If you being serious, you are right. This board is 90% supportive, 5% BS and 5% smart azz.. (That 5% is me LOL )
Seriously, it is a awesome board to get to know and become involved in.

Paige,

I can't add anything anyone hasn't already said.  I hate you are going through this but glad you posted it as a reminder that we are all faced with it and just don't say it.

I'm 5 years out from my RNY and 1 year out from plastics. .... yep... you guessed it.  Right there with ya, Sister.

But the joy is that we have so many friends that will stand behind us and walk with us through 'these times'.

Let me know what works for you and I'll try it.

Good luck.

Janet

Thanks everyone for the support and encouragement!!!  You are all the best!!! 

Me, too.  And nothing different to add....I eat the same stuff over and over to keep from having to "think" about it.  I spend lots of time thinking about food and planning...also same goes into vits and supplements plus coordinating liquids.  I just wanted you to know that you're not alone.  I'm in the same boat and haven't had plastics (not sure I'll get to).  I love the threads with menus (and other sites)  becuase when I'm just exhausted, I'll cheat and just copy those of successful people.  EggFace has a list of different days called "A Day in My Pouch". There are some on Kay's site, Melting Mamas, hungry Girl and all of those on TMB. 

Embrace what it takes to maintain...all the weighing, counting, and planning.

I am 54, and in my younger years I was a fanatic about my weight.  I had a friend who struggled w/her weight but could not overcome her battle.  We are both 5'9"".  I weighed 128 she  weighed 200+  She was one of the first I knew who had her stomach stapled. 

I will never forget the day we were at a baby shower and she told me how lucky I was and how she wished she looked like I did.  I lashed out and told her how much I HATED the feeling of always counting, weighing,  and watching every single morsel that entered my mouth.

Well...I quit doing all the above and spent the next 30 years being obese and hating how I felt and looked, which was a million times worse.  .  That moment is frozen in my mind.  I was really angry because I felt like it was unfair.  I could not eat what others ate and get away with it.  And that is true I could not then, and I never will. 

So...I think of it often and remind myself nothing tastes as good as feeling healthy and looking great.  I can't wait for the day I hit goal and am able to fully enjoy that part of the journey.  Weighing foot and counting is so much easier for me than hiding in the corner because I hate being the fat girl and hate the styles that come in size 24 clothes.

I understand how you feel. Try to reflect back on those moments that made you finally seek WLS and how probably unhappy you were. 

What victory you have today!

Burnt out. I hear ya sister.

One of the things I've seen a lot of post-op people do is hold themselves overly accountable. Don't get me wrong, we need to be accountable to our actions to remain successful. But when we don't even KNOW what true accountability is, we make up what we think is accountability - and what it looks like is more work than is worth the effort for most (to which people stop trying because they think they need to do all this stuff, get sick of it, and then just give up altogether and regain). We're talking the rest of our lives here. What a daunting prospect to be like we were 1-2 years post-op. I'm pretty convinced if we did half of the work we did as fresh post-ops we'd remain successful - it's just the concentrated effort involved daily that makes it feel like a chore. We're not necessarily doing more - we're just concentrating that learned effort because we're so accustomed to what needs to be done. And doing less means regain, right? Right? Hmmpf. I don't buy that.

Let me give you an example of where overaccountabilty can hurt you. Over the last 3 years I've watched a woman on this website (not this board) lose an extraordinary amount of weight. She's had plastics, looks "normal", and eats a very healthy diet. VERY healthy. Rarely strays off plan. Puts everything down that enters her mouth. Moves her body, gets her fluids, everything. Recently she started ranting about minuscule weight gain. SO INSTEAD of trusting that everything she's doing is still working, she's going to change up the game plan. Why? Because of a little weight gain? When you know A+B+C has always equaled D? I just don't get it. Making things more difficult because it gives you a sense of control doesn't necessarily mean you're going to have more success. It'll likely make you even more miserable. And I don't know about you - but I didn't sign up to be more miserable.

Take a moment and ask yourself where your actions and accountability fall. What you're willing to do daily to make you happy (not miserable!). Tracking food, exercise, vitamins, fluids, etc. Assign an acceptable weight range to yourself. Goal is great but just like naturally thin folk, there's a 10-15 pound weight range up that's normal (we're talking the rest of our lives here!). Decide your plan of action if you get to an uncomfortable point and find comfort in knowing you have a plan. One of the many comforts I take along with me is IF I could lose 190 pounds following the rules, I can lose anything that I regain. What's a handful of pounds versus 190? Nothin'! YAHOO!

 Jenny