PLEASE PLEASE PRAY FOR ME AND MY FAMILY TODAY !!!!

 I am extremely upset this AM.  My son and his GF left the house last night to go to a NA meeting and when they got home I told them that I wanted to see their suboxine.    They refused to show it to me and argued with me about "why" I wanted to see it.   I told them that I "needed to see it" to prove to me that they were still taking it.     They did NOT show me.     I have a extremely busy day today and when I get home I am confronting them both ( when he gets home from work).    IF they then don't show me I will more and likely be tossing them out in the streets which will more than kill me.   I have to do this for me !!!!   These kids are totally distroying my life and sanity.    I am battling weight gain due to stress !!!! PLEASE pray for me today.    This is totally breaking my heart !!!   I love my children with ALL my heart and it will kill me to have to do this but trust me.....I WILL DO IT to save his life in the long run.    Thanks I love you guys SO much !!!!!


Hugs and blessings ~~~ Vivian

VIV-I hope you are not in this alone-I hope your husband is backing you up and being there too. Even though this is your CHILD, and will ALWAYS be, of course, keep in mind, HE IS AN ADULT.

Did you ever look into whatever support for YOU the others advised way back when? Was it NA? I don't have any personal experince in this area, so I'm not about to dole out "advice". I have worked, as a professional, in the addiction field, but not as a mom/family member, so CANNOT know how you are feeling. But I DO know "users" can ruin the health/well being of those around them ,until they use them up entirely. Is that fair to you? Your husband? Your other sons? Only YOU can decide what you are willing to live with. If you CHOOSE to live it, then you gotta shut up and take whatever comes with it. 

We can pray for you very day-and we do-but nothing will change until some hard decisions are made.

 Thanks Gina.......It is very hard !!!  But they won't even provide me with the pill bottle for the prescription for it.   Or at least a "current" one.    I have been suspecting that they may be using again...but when I asked them to show me their suboxine after they susposedly went and got some and they refused....got me to thinking.   My WL is at a standstill in fact the stress has made me gain a little.   I WILL NOT let that happen.    The stress has to go and if they won't comply then they are gone from my house !!!!   My husband is working today but I have talked to him and he agrees with me.    My 19 and 28 yr old's both told me that they "think" they are using again.    They deny it of course and say that the suboxine will keep them from getting high.....well maybe if they are taking a oppoit.( I know I misspelled that )  but you know what I am talking about.     I am at my witts end.   I question sometimes why I adopted a child from drug addict parents !!!   UGH breaks my heart !!!!   I love him enough to kick him to the curb so he will ( hopefully ) get help and stay clean.   If they show me the suboxine everything will be fine.    But I think there is NO suboxine here.


Hugs and blessings ~~~ Vivian

For you and your family you MUST do what is best Vivian.  Enabling them to continue doing "their thing" will break you all apart.  Most abusers have to hit rock bottom before they come up.  There was a family situation I discussed with a counselor before that was affecting some of my family members and it hurt me to see them hurt.  The main thing he told me is ENABLING can't happen, break free NOW.  You don't deserve to go through this.

 Thanks Dana.   They are NOW gone from my house.    They left about 4:30 today.   He ( naturally ) took HER word over mine.   She did finally show me the pharmacy paper where it said that they did get the meds 2 days ago.    That is ALL I wanted in the first place was proof that they were taking them as they should.    Right now....I know my son and his GF are telling everyone that I am the biggest ***** that ever walked the earth.    Probably saying I kicked them out...which isn't true at all....but I was tired of her lazy butt not ever doing anything in my house but staying in the bedroom ( which I might add is the BIGGEST mess !!!  UGH I am glad that she is gone !!!  Hate it that my son left the way he did but his dad said if she couldn't follow my rules and comply to what i said that she had to go.    I have the biggest headache ever right now.   I only got 3 hours sleep last night anyway.   I pray your boys NEVER put you through anything like this....it is HELL !!!




Hugs and blessings ~~~ Vivian

So is your checking his medicine the same as checking a food addicts breath for donuts? You know how it is Viv. You can't make anyone do something. Even if it is right versus wrong. Here, eat this salad because it's healthy and good for you, or go get a double cheeseburger and suffer the consequences of obesity related health problems. Oh so many times I chose the cheeseburger.

Addiction isn't cured, ever. It takes a long time to unravel tight knots and try to keep them straight. If he's at least working toward change, let him be. He doesn't have to be accountable to you. What good is accountability to you if he's not accountable to himself?! And if he's not doing what he needs to be doing and using again, cut him free. It would be the hardest thing to do as a parent but if it ever came to that, I would let my daughter make her own choices even if it ended in her ultimate demise. My final attempt to set her straight would be to bring her to a funeral home to have her pick out her own casket (don't threaten to do it, DO IT). If she continues to choose to commit slow suicide with drugs, she can make the choice on where she lies for eternity. That's of course if she doesn't die in a gutter as Jane Doe from overdose.

Prayers continue for your family Vivian. But there will come a time where he has to **** or get off the pot, and either way you might still get hurt in the process. PLEASE take care of yourself. God bless.

Jenny

 They are gone now Jenny.

Hugs and blessings ~~~ Vivian

I'm so sorry, Vivian.

May you find comfort in these sad days, my friend. 

 Thanks Jenny.

Hugs and blessings ~~~ Vivian

Wow Jenny, wish I had thought about that when I was dealing my sons Heroin addiction.  Maybe it would have helped.  He is clean now almost 3 years cause he is doing the Methadone.