Surgery Tomorrow.... I'm scared to death.

Well, it is finally here.  I have been sick for a little over two years now.  I told Dr Provost at my pre-op appointment yesterday that the concept of NOT being sick was something I was having a hard time grasping.  Yesterday, I was excited like a kid in a candy store.  I was also very nervous.  I had to take some medicine for my stomach before I could leave to get to my appointment.
Yesterday, I was scared about the pain.  That was my main concern.  (I am allergic to Vicodin, Ultram, AND MORPHINE!!!)  Dr Provost told me that he would give my benadryl and Morphine together while I was in the hospital.  The only reaction that I have ever had to those meds was a bad rash.  When I get home, however, he isn't giving me the Loratab.  I am going straight from Morphine to Darvocet and maybe Celebrex.  I have NO pain tolerance, and I am having an Open surgery.
I am still nervous about that, but I am almost in tears today....... They have had me on high calorie, high fat, high sugar foods since I have been so malnourished.  They were TRYING to get calories in me.  I was pushing myself to eat things that make us dump.  Since I am further out, it wasn't bothering me AS bad though.  This is my problem.... Yesterday, they told me high protein, no carbs from then on..... I immediately starting craving sweets.
I have to RETRAIN myself on how to eat healthy foods.  As sick as I have been.... it just hit me late last night that I will have NOTHING to keep me from eating junk.  I also have nothing to keep me from eating out of boredom/emotional eating.  That is really worrying me.  Sweets weren't a problem in the past for me.  I was just the person that ate when I was emotional or bored.  Now I seem to have BOTH problems......
Man, I will need you guys for support more than ever.  I just have to remember that I CAN do this.  I CAN use self control, and I CAN start exercising.  I AM going to get better.... It is just all very scary. 
I have to be at the hospital at 9am tomorrow.  Surgery is at 10:15.  I am sooo ready, but VERY nervous. 

Please remember to keep me in your prayers.  I already plan on posting AS soon as I get a chance from the hospital.  My husband will be there to make me get out of the bed and WALK, WALK, WALK.   

Love y'all. 
-Kim T

Kim,

You will do just fine.

I have you in my thoughts and prayers.

I will be there to see you as soon as I can.

You are in good hands and everything will be just fine.

Kim BREATH girl - thats it in and out - deep breaths  -now try this
grab a paper and write out what is worrying you and then decide on each one

*can you control or fix it
*does God or your higher power need to deal with it

now mark off the ones YOU can't fix - now do you have a very short list
bet you do - now you only have to deal with WHAT YOU CAN FIX

it will be ok  - my husband is alergic to narc pain meds  and he managed TWO total knee rebuilds this last year - ask for phenergin (sp?) supositorys -AND pain meds as long as your alergic reactions aren't  bad  - that would help you sleep though the pain - talk to your doc about the take home meds BEFORE surgery with the understanding you will reevaluate AFTER surgery before you leave the hospital

and breath girl- it will work out
hugs
Danni

LOL, thank you.  I told Teena that I think I just needed to vent.  I felt so much better after typing everything out.  I think that reality just hit me all at once, and it scared me a little.  I know that God will not give me more than I can handle.  This is step towards feeling better, not a step backwards. 
Thanks for the advice.

-Kim T

WOW Girl, Slow down...

All will go well.  Have a peaceful sleep tonight knowing that tomorrow will be the beginning.

You are in my prayers and in my heart.

Que

 

 

LOL, I am okay now.  I am back to being excited.  Thank you for the prayers.... they are ALWAYS appreciated.  I am going to get a good nights sleep.  They called me and told me to be ther at 6am tomorrow am.  It's 1.5 hrs away.  Going to bed early.  Tomowwow, I will be a new person.

Thanks.

-Kim T

Hells YAY Baby!

You are in awesome hands.  Dr. Provost is wonderful and consider yourself in my prayers.  Don't push yourself about posting...we know you'll be OK...get some well deserved rest.
hugs, Y

Thank you.  I have to push myself a little because otherwise I will stay in bed and not walk.  As long as I am not too doped up, I plan on getting on just long enough to let everyone know I'm alive.

-Kim T

Kim -   sorry I haven't been on much lately -  been a crazy week for me.....................

I hope that your surgery goes well - I'm sure that you'll be fine !!!

Just walk walk walk.........................WE ARE ALL HERE FOR YOU...........IF YOU NEED ME - CALL ME  469-417-015  - GARLAND ISN'T TOO FAR FROM IRVING.................

 

Luv you !!