PLEASE PRAY FOR MY FAMILY NOW !!!

 Michelle.....I am so sorry that you have gone through this also.   It is tough.   I am going to sit both him and his GF down when they get out and when they are through...they might not want to live in my house !!!!  I am going to have strict rules.....and I WILL Stand by them !!!!   Thanks for the prayers.   I know we will need all we can get to get them past all this !!!


Hugs and blessings ~~~ Vivian

Viv,

Glad I can help.  If you can get them to go on to long term treatment you should see if you can do that.  I am sure the counselors at the rehab they are at will have suggestions.  A week is really not long enough.  If they do come home make sure you have a contract that they BOTH need to sign with very specific rules.  Addicts are very manipulative and will promise it wont happen again, and they will sign that contract but sometimes they just cant help it and they go back to what an addict does best and tht is use.  I went through this so many times with Dan.  He ended up in a homeless shelter.  I hated it he hated it but it was shortly after that he got clean.  I did 28 days in rehab got out and used again a year later but knew enough to go back to meetings. (AA saved my life)  Anyway...again if I can help let me know.  I know God has big plans for him and his GF they just have to open their eyes, get clear heads and they will see for themselves.  Hugs.

 Thank you SO much Michelle.   I know that both have been told and asked if they wanted to stay for the long term and I wish and pray that they would both do this.   Natalie did go through the long term program 10 yrs ago her mom told me.   She was clean for 10 years.    Shawn has never gone through anything like this before and he was scared to death yesterday.   He is in Oak Cliff...not a real desireable area of Dallas.    I am praying that someone there will convince them both that they need to be there long term.    I want only what is best for them and trust me.....I WILL do contracts and I will kick them to the curb if need be.   Love you and praying for you that your move will go so smoothly.   Please don't stress over it Michelle.    It will be OK.

Hugs and blessings ~~ Vivian

Remember, "there comes a time in your life when you are no longer responsible for your children's foolishness!
Meggie

 Oh Meggie my friend I am NOT in ANYWAY responsible for his drug habit.   His biological Mother will have to stand before God one day and answer to him for this !!!!  She is the one who predesteined him to this....not ME !!!  I have never done drugs, smoked or anything.    It just kills me that after I told him to stay away and not try drugs because his parents were addcits....he did it anyway.   Praying now that he will get clean and stay that way.   Otherwise he will not live in my house ( which is where he is going aftet detox) they are losing their apartment this weekend !!!  Worked 9 hours yesterday after I got him in rehab.


Hugs and blessings ~~~ Vivian

Good! Stay strong and know you are loved!!
Meggie

Vivian,

I will most definitely pray for you and your family.

You are a very loving mother and not everyone has one of those.

As a person who was addicted to drugs from 12-19 yrs old I will tell you that my family tried over and over and over again to get me help and each time I thought I was ready and I was not.

I am so glad that they never gave up on me because Goddess knows I gave up on me a long time ago.

I only recovered when I was sick and tired of being sick and tired and living in chaos.

I hope for your families sake that your son and his GF is sick and tired of being sick and tired and living in chaos.

You all have a long and hard journey ahead of you and I wish you nothing, but the best.

I hope he gets in rehab today as I know most of them have a cut off time for intake.

I also hope you all are able to move them out B4 Monday.

He is very blessed to have a supportive family.

God Bless you.

P.S. Allowing addicts to live with you even if one of them is your son will most definitely cause major issues with your family dynamics in your home.

When addicts are sick there is NO limit to what they will do to get a fix

I hope that they would never steal from you.

I never stole from my mother so I hope he would not.

 Teena......Thank you so much for being so kind.   I am sorry that you were also addicted to drugs.    That is heartbreaking.    As a Mom I want the very best for all of my sons.    My son has stolen from us in the past.    He has also done some time in jail for other things.    But for him to admit that he needs help was a huge start.   I am going to have some pretty strict rules and if they are broken they will be on the streets.   I have had about enough of all this crap.


Hugs and blessings ~~ Vivian

Vivian:

First - my prayers and thoughts are with you. As a recovering alcoholic and a sober drug addict, i can tell you it is a hard road to walk - not just for the one with the disease, but also for the family.
Your son's g/f is NOT in rehab - she is in detox. There is a HUGE difference. Detox is a short period treatment program - where the person is weaned off their drug of choice under the supervision of medical professionals. In addition, they are given as much information regarding sobriety, NA/AA, etc. during their short stay. Detox is NOT the end of the treatment - it is only the very first baby step.
A treatment program that actually has a chance of working has to last for a minimum of 3 weeks (preferably at least 28 days - if not longer) and once detox is finished - involved intensive classes, groups, etc.
You need to get in touch with Tough Love (if you cannot find a number for them - shoot me a PM and I will find you one.) You need to insist on a contract between your son,his g/f and ya'll about the rules of their living with you. And - hardness of all - you have to be willing to enforce the rules - even if it means kicking them out on the street.
I know - from my own experience - that rock bottom has to be hit before sobriety and recovery can begin. Oxy is as hard to get off as heroin. They have a long road ahead of them and while they need your love and support, they also need structure and consequences for choices.

Anne

 Thank you Anne.....I am definately leaning the way you are speaking of and I already told them....no more chances.   This is it !!!!  I also spoke to them about staying for the long haul.    You are right.   They are in detox not rehab.   


Hugs and blessings ~~~ Vivian