Those who are maintaining ......

Ok, I know there are some of you who have had surgery 2,3,4 years ago or even more. I was wondering how hard it is to keep continue your success? I am scared that after the "honeymoon" phase is over, about 9-18 months (so my nut says), how hard will it be to keep the weight off or am I going to struggle. My main reason for weight gain over the years has been my periods. I have PMDD and everytime I get my period I gain weight because my stomach is never "FULL". I eat and eat and eat. Even after surgery I want to eat all the time 2 weeks prior to my period but I can only eat a few bites of something and it cannot be nearly close to what I used to eat or I will throw up. But I am scared this will eventually cease and I will be back to my "old self" again. I am trying to change it but this PMDD issue has been something I have been working on with doctors over the course of 17 years now. Nothing ever helps it or decreases my hormones. Will my stomach eventually expand again and I will gain it all back? Or are there people who are a few years out and still have limited eating capacities? I am trying not to stress about it but it is always in the back of my mind. That fear of gaining my weight back. I cannot tell you how uncontrolable these cravings and hunger pains are at that time of the month. They are horrible and I used to cry everytime I put food to my lips (for 2 weeks) because I knew it was going to pack on another pound or so.... but I would get SOOOOO hungry ! I couldn't finish a regular value meal at McDonalds pre-surgery , when I was NOT pms'ing, when I was pms'ing I would order a value meal AND a snack and eat it all only to be hungry again an hour or two later. Not just a little hungry but starving. It is really scary. I have been through every avenue and doctor over the years and been on every pill known to man and nothing ever helped. Since surgery I have gone through 2 periods and I have not been able to fight the hunger, but it just takes a few bites to make me full. & my choices are a bit healther because I dare not test the waters with my new stomach. Except yesterday, I dared to take a fry from my sons food and I threw it up. Yep, it sucked. But....in 2 years from now, or farther out, will that change? Will I be able to handle those foods again and then gain all my weight back? Will I eat more and more? 
Sorry for the long one guys! I am just really scared. I DONT want to go back to where I was. I was always an average size, size 8, until I hit the end of high school and my periods (which used to come every few months) started coming regularly and I started having really bad periods that would last 2 weeks. Then I started getting PMDD and it downward spiraled from there. I remember 10 years ago when I met my husband and I was 170 and swore I was the fatest person on earth and I cried b/c I was a size 10 and I was telling my doctor how out of control my eating was around my period. She put me on Prozac and the pill. 2 months later I came back in bigger tears because I had gone from 170 to 192 and her exact words were "at least your not 200". I cried and cried. By the time I had surgery April 30th of this year, I was 260. Uggh.
Ok, Ok, Ok, I am ending this novel! Thanks for your help everyone! You all are always so helpfull! 
Have a great Sunday! 
Michele

Michelle - I am 3 and a half years out - I still throw up when I eat stuff I shouldn't   - I have learned to make better choices - at a few months out I could only eat half a taco (made with beans - greezy meat made me sick - still does some) now I can eat a whole taco and most of the time I do - but I do not eat a whole taco or 5 or 6 everyday or even every month - I emotionally eat still - hubby is going to the sandbox for a month then home a month then iraq for a yr - you think I am emotional you bet I am!! am I stuffing my face? yes and no. I am eating every hour or two but instead of high fat high sugar "comfort" foods I am making good choices, I am eating SMALL servings - half a sonci jr burger (yes I can eat a whole jr burger now but half satisfys me so I quit then) half a choc granola bar. I am making homemade cream of chicken soup today to take up to Tim on CQ and latter I will make homemade pizza - the differnce is I will have two small bowls of soup over the afternoon instead of making a really big pot so I could eat a ton and him not know, I will have 2 sm slices of pizza instaed of half of one

so part of it is yes you will still dump if you do now
yes your pouch get bigger but NO it should not get huge agian unless you abuse it repeately

use your honeymoon to learn good habits - small healthy meals/snacks
working out
taking your vits
getting all your protien and water in every single day

all of these will KEEP you healthy and that is what it is all about - and remember most woman do fluxuate on their peirods - I have a 5 pound bounce that happens every flippen month - Ihave learned to not freak out, but keep pushing water, good foods and moving and it comes right back off b/c it is water weight

to me it is hard to keep working on maintiaining but not as hard as dieting was - it is hard b/c I am by nature a lazy person and have to always push to do what I need to but it is no where near as hard as being the fattest woman everywhere I go was,

it is easyer when I know I won't embarrass my husband or kids with my size ( my off the wall humor is another matter LOL)

so hang in there - keep coming here for support and LEARN THOSE GOOD HABITS NOW!!!

Peace
Danni

Thank you SOOOO very much! That is exactly what I needed to hear! I appreciate you taking the time to share that with me! I know how hard you have it and I only have 2 little ones. I gained 30lbs this past deployment!! 30lbs in 15 months! That is HORRIBLE! I guess I am an emotional eater too. My hormones were OFF the charts while he was gone and I felt like everyday I was on my period.
I am glad you mentioned tha****er weight because I was totally paranoid yesterday! I was 208 and quite happy, then my period started yesterday and I could not get the scale to go under 211 and I was so upset. I thought I gained 3lbs. I knew part was water weight, but it still upset me.
I can handle the idea of my pouch getting a little bigger based on what you said. That makes sense and it seems like I can still control things at that point. I guess my fear was after a year or so (I heard 9/10 months from some poeple and that scares me) the honeymoon is over and your pouch is the same as it was before and you will gain weight easily. That is what scared me. If I can still take advantage of the pouch being smaller than it was, I guess Im good. Hopefully my choices will stay on the better side. I really do try to make good choices and sometimes I feel I do not get enough calories. I try and try to get more calories in, but aside from my protein shakes, I get about 400 a day if that. I struggle to eat enough. But I am still scared of overeating in the future.
Thanks again for sharing. I feel a bit of releif! LOL
& sorry to hear your hubby is going back again! Hang in there! I will be in your neck of the woods soon... we PCS to Fort Benning, GA in Oct. Can't wait but I hear Columbus, GA is horrible with crime! I just want out of Texas! 110* heat is KILLING me! 

glad to help I was blessed with awsome support most places we have been - I keep coming back to the TMB b/c tx is home n someday we will move home again
Ga is differt but we live on base, I have found walmart n have internet - so it is like most bases LOL read my sig line for my take on moving :)

I will pm you my number feel free to text whenever you need a little extra right now support - anytime day or night since I turn the text noise off at night but get up with Tim at 4 for PT

Listen to Danni's wise words. She is one of my inspirations and a fantastic lady who I miss seeing. I don't agree on everything she said like her being a lazy person by nature, she gets more done in one day then people get done in a week lol.

Good luck on your journey. Just take one day at a time and try not to stress over it. Like Danni said start with your good habits now. This is a life style change and that doesn't mean you can't have something you want you just have to have it in moderation. Good luck you can do it!

Lorraine

I will be 4 years out in November and have been at or below my goal weight since December 2006. Once I finally got my weight to bottom out and stop losing, I've had a pretty easy maintenance. One key thing that has forced me into maintaining is once I got a full wardrobe of clothes that fit at my lowest weight, I got rid of everything that was too big or even the slightest bit baggy. If I put on more than a few lbs. my clothes start getting tight and uncomfortable and I don't have "fat pants" anymore that I can put on so that's my constant reminder to stay on track.

I'll be 5 years out November 3rd.

You've been given excellent advice!  I concur!  I especially agree with Julie on having no "fat pants" or "jogging pants" or any other pants one can crawl in to be comfortable.  When my clothes become uncomfortable, I start paying more attention and I lose it quickly. 

I was considered a "lightweight" going into surgery at 252.  There seems to be a consensus that "lightweights" get to lower weights.  Remember that a successful RNYer loses and keeps off -- what is it?  65% of the weight they need to lose.   (You may check that stat but it's not 100%!) My lowest weight was 125 and I was way too thin!  I had a "bounce back" of as much as 25 pounds but at 150 I was still wearing size 4/6.  I think this is because when you lose the fat the skin still needs time to recover and continues to shrink; so, for me, the gain was like an even switch?  I've been through a lot of stress recently and I've lost 20 pounds. So, I am at 130 right now and all my clothes 4/6 are too big!  I don't look well -- especially in my face. 

I still have restriction.  Some days I can eat more than others but it all seems to even out.  I don't deprive myself; so I'll have a small piece of cake or whatever I am craving because if I don't the monster grows and I eat more of everything else which actually adds calories.  For some people, that doesn't work; they have to stay completely away.  You are going to learn a lot about yourself IF you pay attention to your own *cycle* and you are already aware; now, you just have to use what you know about yourself and your cycle to learn effective ways of dealing with it.

Your body is going to find the place it wants to be and acceptance is crucial.  Not everyone loses down to a low weight.  Not everyone finds *tiny* sizes (and trust me, vanity sizing is everywhere).  When I weighed 130 in the 90s, I was a size 8/10.  I wish I had an old pair because I know they would fit me just like these 4/6s. 

Goal doesn't have to mean a size.  It can mean being healthy and active.  My surgeon never gave me a goal weight but when I asked several months out and weighed 150 pounds he said, "I'd say you're at goal.  Your labs are great and you look fantastic!"    The average American woman is a size 14 the last time I checked the statistics.  So much of this is a state of mind and we are the only ones that can control that state of mind.  Think positive.  Don't fret.  Focus and rejoice on the good things!

Now, because of the history you gave regarding your health, I'd like to ask if your Thyroid has been checked recently?  I mean a full thyroid panel.  The Board of Endocrinology changed the acceptable range in 2003 and there are still many people who have hypothyroidism that are not being diagnosed b/c some laboratories have yet to get the numbers correct and many PCPs and surgeons are not aware of the changes.  Once I was diagnosed with the new numbers, I went back and looked at blood work that was 10 years old and I was hypothyroid THEN.  If it had been caught, I may not have gained 10 pounds every year for 10 years!  The thyroid hormones control so much in your body that even the insurance companies have caught on to regular testing once diagnosed because it can be the culprit of so many other illnesses.  Then, it is much cheaper for insurance companies to have your thyroid treated than treating the symptoms!!  For example, my insurance company is AETNA and they will actually CALL me if I haven't had my thyroid checked in the last 6 months.  They want it tested every 3 months. 

I suddenly feel like I'm rambling!  

Try not to fret.  You're on a journey that is completely your own.  Try to enjoy the ride!

WOW! That is funny you mentioned thyroid because my mom, my aunt, and my grandfather all had thyroid problems and my numbers were never "high enough". Now I am wondering. And 10lbs a year for 10 years, that is my EXACT pattern! Would I go to my PCP for testing? How is it treated? So does this have anything to do with my PMDD? Would it alter my moods and cravings? I am really psyched now! LOL. Thank you for your information! I have been searching for a reason for my insanity for years.
I never figured out why so many people had such mild PMS compared  me. My friends never got as moody as I did or ate as much as I did. Some of my friends said they would pig out the day before, or the day of their period, but for me it has always been 2-3 weeks before. Sometimes, my pms is back to back. I can end my period, and a week later start pms'ing for the next one. My hormones are so crazy. Hmmm. Thanks! I am going to talk to my pcp asap! 

heya.
Have you been diag also with PCOS? that also has to do with the PMDD, eating, blah blah freakin b lah lol.  I totally relate to what you are going thru and i STRONGLY suggest you see an endocrinologist (sp??) immediately for testing of thyroid and PCOS.  Vanessa is the thyroid queen around here as are a few other ladies. Definately look into this!
Liz

Wow. I was told I had PCOS but I never paid any mind to it because I thought it was a bogus claim the OBGYN gave me after I had a miscarriage. I never had any cysts on my ovaries, I never had pain, and I was able to get pregnant in one shot. So I did not think I had it. I guess it would make sense looking back. I am going to call my PCP today and try to get a thyroid test done. I appreciate everyones help and the heads up! This is turning over a new leaf for me.... I have been struggling to figure out my hormones for YEARS!