Monday WLS Express

Hi Susan,

I'm having the same issues you describe with not stopping eating when I'm full.  I think it's often just not paying attention to how my body feels. 

You may remember that I had quite a contentious relationship with my Mother.  Taking care of her needs as she got older and her health declined was one of the hardest things I ever did.  She was not a nice person even when she was healthy.  I would never have chosen her to be part of my circle of friends.  I really struggled with that more and more as the tables turned and I had to make decisions regarding her health and care.  It has taken me a long time to come to terms with my mother and my life with her.  I have finally come to the conclusion that she never set out to be a "bad" mother and she probably did the best she could do given her own cir****tances and mental health. 

My advice to you is, do whatever you have to do as it relates to your mother, but don't forget that your most important job is taking care of yourself.  Do what's necessary to preserve your own mental health and take pride in the fact that you are a fabulous mother to those beautiful boys of yours.  And don't feel guilty about keeping some healthy distance between yourself and your mother. 

You will be in my prayers.

Hey Vicki!!

Wow...someone else who doesn't know when to stop eating??  What's wrong with us?? LOL I think I get too busy talking and enjoying my food that I forget to pay attention to what my body is trying to tell me.  Plus, I hate leaving those last couple of bites on the plate.  Years of "training" I suppose.  I'm working really hard on not doing that to my kids.  Trying to teach them to guage how hungry they are, to take less than they think they really want and to wait and see if that satisfies them before reaching for more.  Of course, if they are still hungry, seconds are fine.  But, a lot of the time they realize they don't really want/need it.  I hope this saves them problems down the road!!

As for the mother situation.....are our mothers sisters? Mine has always had issues and has always been a little less than normal and nice her whole life anyway.  As she's aging, it's beyond awful.  I'm thankful that my brother lives next door and my sister is only 30 minutes away.  They are close by and can do much more than I can at this point. 

Thanks for the advice.  I'm trying to follow it as best I can.  Keeping distance is my favorite part of it.  Dh and I have already agreed that if she starts acting up while we are there, we will simply pick up our bags and leave.  It'll be hard to do, but if we need/have to, we can and will. 

Picking up and leaving is a great idea if it comes to that.  I actually did it once when my kids were little.  On my way out the door I simply said, "I had to put up with this crap when I lived here, but I don't live here any more."  It was one of the most empowering things I ever did for myself.   It didn't really change anything except it made me realize that I had more power in the relationship than I realized. 

I had to keep reminding myself that just because I was my mother's child, I was not a child and was not going to be treated as one.  Why is it so hard for us to define ourselves and our roles as they relate to our mothers?  Just remember, If you wouldn't let someone else treat you that way, you don't have to let your mother treat you that way!

In the long run, you'll be glad you kept trying to have any kind of relationship with your mom.  But just remember, preserve your own mental health.  You are a strong and beautiful woman who has the power to walk away if necessary.

Thanks Vicki!!  I needed to hear that!  :)

Last year, I left 2 days early when we went to visit.  It was one of the hardest things I've ever done.  I swear, I shook the entire 44 miles to my in-laws house.  It was like I was running away from home and scared that my mother was going to come find me and make me go back home.  What's up with that?  LOL 

Good morning
I was up earlier then I planned on, 5 instead of 545 as I was having tummy issues. Its going to be a long day for me as I am working both job. I pan on taking my 1 lunch at the end of my shift today if its not busy and maybe hitting the gym in between jobs. I left the house this morning at 6:30 and will be home around 11ish  I hope. So far today its not  been too good. I  drove my daughter's car to work again as mine is having either starter problems or needs a new battery (hope its just the battery). My daughter called me from Boston (she there with Friends on vacation), they just got news that one of her best Friends Grandfather just past away (she is on the trip to with some of her family), so I'm not really sure whats going to happen, they weren't suppose to come home on Friday. Then Hubby called me and told me the IRS took $310 out of our account (taxes) we have made other arraignments to get it taken care of and  they were not suppose to do that. He Finley called me back, he has been on the phone with the IRS and got it straitened out, he said that it will not happen again but they aren't putting it back in either. I just hate the IRS they love to screw the little people over but if you have money its no problem with there is a mistake on your taxes. Ok enough with my venting, the day has to get better.

Lorraine

Morning all,

I'm up and running this morning.  Already on my second load of laundry, vitamins and first cup of coffee down, trash out by the curb.  Time to stop and make myself some breakfast as soon as I finish this post. 

Took DH to a furniture store on Saturday planning to buy a new coffee table with my birthday money.  Instead, we bought a new mattress!  We've still been sleeping on the old one we've had since I weighed 300+ pounds.  There was such a "hole" where I slept that it was like sleeping in a ditch.  The new one will be delivered today.  It's a firm mattress with a memory foam top.  I can't wait to sleep on a comfy mattress tonight.  And I found a big square black leather ottoman at Ross for $150 to replace my coffee table.  BONUS.  Going to offer my old coffee table on freecycle.com.  Hopefully, someone will come and pick it up.

We went to see the new Transformers movie yesterday.  I ended up enjoying it, but I hated the first 45 minutes or so.  It was as if the camera was too close to the action when it was filmed.  They had all these cool special FX, but you couldn't actually focus on them because they were too close and too fast, but it was still enjoyable in the long run. 

I hope you all have a great day and make good choices. 

Wooo hooo on the new mattress Vicki!!  Enjoy a great night's sleep tonight. :)

We are looking at a new mattress too. Ours is 18 years old and has the grand canyon where I sleep! I can curl up in one end of it now(Ikinda sleep curled up like a cat!) The sleep number one's have all kins of special deals this week!! Maybe that would help me sleep bettre!

Meggie

Good morning from Carefree Arizona!!!!  I can't believe that I get to wake up to this view for the next 3 1/2 weeks!!!!!


We are trying to get use to the time change (2 hours earlier here).  It's 8:30 and the kids already have on their swim suits!!!  The water is a bit cold right now so I think they have decided to play on the Wii for a while before they jump in!!!!  Gonna go jump on the treadmill for before it gets too hot out... yes it's outside!!!  (It was 111 degrees out yesterday but NO HUMIDITY!!!)  Then I think I'm off to find some new pool toys for the kids!! 

Have a great day... and prayers out to all who need them today!!

AWESOME view!!!  Enjoy your time there!!  :)