How do you see yourself?

April 1, 08 I had WLS, prior to that and months afterwords I saw myself in a certain image a big guy. Now that didn't really effect my self confidence it was what it was.
As I dropped the weight the new image was hard for me to recognize. As I would pass a mirror I didn't recognize the person I had become.
I don't know when it happened but it did I became comfortable with who I've become and have a hard time remembering how I did look as well as all the medical issues.
Of course I have pictures and that helps but I have to rely on them. I'm not even a year out and this physical and emotional change has occurred.
Its been said in today's society we have short term memory loss we push forward and leave yesterdays issues in the past. Example: 911 I don't think anyone here will forget but even after 7 years the memory has dulled or a long term relationship at first your so infatuated then it dulls or becomes a stronger deeper love, but it changes do to life issues.
 So whats the point??
I feel with out the constant reminders of where we came from not just physical appearance but our entire medical being that the dullness could lead to old habits trying to re-introduce themselves.
Much like 911 with the annual anniversary of that tragic event keeps it fresh and the long term relationship the simple kindness, the hand holding, the kiss, the date night keeps it fresh.
So how do you keep this journey we've all taken fresh.
C'ya Bob

Bob,
This is a good topic, although a difficult one.  Since I haven't met goal, it may not be as difficult for me to remember where I came from.  But, I, too, find myself forgetting, hence, the midnless grazing.  I have put pictures of me at my largest around the house-it helps to remind me of all the hard work.  The other thing that may be unique to me, every month when I pay my surgery note, I remember where I came from and where I am going since I self paid for this!

Marilyn I've heard you before speak of being self pay and yet never thought of it as a motivator. But your right to not stay focused would be like buying a new car without insurance and wrecking it only to keep making the payments. Even though I was fortunate to have insurance there was still a substantial amount out of pocket cost, deductibles, non reimbursements, loss wages etc.. That will be another motivator I'll stick in my pocket good point. C'ya Bob

What an interesting subject.   I have just had my surgery and am just now seeing the "melting me" in the mirror.  I've lost weight before only to put it right back on.  I don't think it has yet struck me that cal be forever if I use the new tool in the way it was meant to be used.

I have always seen myself as the biggest person in the room.  I have others tell me that is not true, but I still feel it.  I have compensated for my perceived physical inadequacies by using my personality and determination to accomplish things in life.  You see I have always thought that I had to prove my "worthiness" by doing something outstanding that would be recognized by others.  Always seeking the "pat on the head" for a job well done.  I am very proud of myself for my accomplishments  but have never really been proud of "me".

I don't know how this is going to feel, or how I should feel about it.  It is going to be interesting to see how I deal with being "normal".  I'm sure there will be less stress.  The main thing that I have to fight is that I'm not using this as another accomplishment to prove myself once again.  When all is said and done, I hope that I can see this as the means to an end of the "prove yourself worthy" lifestyle, and maintain the fire that is in my belly (no pun intended) right now to get the weight off and change my lifestyle.

I'm going to make myself a note to re-think this in 6 months and again in a year.  

Thanks for the insight Bob. 

Cathy that was one of my concerns before WLS could this last long term, I'm sure its a question most if not all of us have asked. Never been one that was ever involved in a support group I didn't give a lot of weight (no pun intended) to them.
But during this journey I Begin early on to realize how important they are to keep us aware and focus on what we're trying to accomplish as well as accountable to a new set of friends.
Needing that peer approval and that need to do things better then the next person can help in this journey by modifying that perfectionism towards your vision of being the perfect you. Thanks for your input. C'ya Bob

I find this a very great topic, and I look forward to the day, I can be where you are Bob...  but right now, I've lost 40 pounds, and while others are noticing, I don't.  I look in the mirror and I still see the huge me...  I see that I'm wearing smaller clothes, and it is exciting to get rid of the big ones, but I still wear bigger than "normal clothes." 

What I have noticed is...  I catch myself, before grazing...   I want to exercise and get healthy and fit.   I pay attention to my water intact and my vitamins.  So I know I have developed healthier habits!

The one thing I tell myself and everyone...  It did not take me an overnight to look like I did/do, so it will take longer than overnight to look and feel healthier.

My journey is "fresh" & I have a long way to go...    thankfully I have this board full of folks like you who have made the journey before me, and folks who are making the journey along with me, and this is offering a huge support!

Thank you all!

Amy I've noticed especially with single moms that a great motivator is their child or children. Once you've enjoyed the activity that you never experienced before its hard to give that up by back sliding. Not to mention you need to be healthy so your able to provide for them.
 As well as the thought of not taking your children down that same path you traveled, protecting them from health issues and teasing. By creating positive eating habits early on so it becomes normal.
Thanks for jumping in.
C'ya Bob

One thing that makes me remember where I came from is to visit my online forums DAILY.  I may not always post, but I have 5 different ones that I'm part of.  I read people's stories, and it makes me think, "OH Yeah! I forgot when that happened." such as small things I forgot about postop life...  I also read of their small victories which really are HUGE victories...  like an individual who says, "I crossed my legs the first time today in 20 yrs!"  It makes me remember the times when I could not cross my legs either.

I also blog about my feelings and emotional changes that I've gone through.  I am always analyzing the things going on around me, and thinking, asking myself, "How would i have reacted to this when I was obese?"  It is always a part of me, near and dear to my heart, this postop life of mine. 

I am also reminded of what life was before surgery when I hear of someone who was aiming for a healthier life through gastric bypass and they passed away due to complications.  I remember when I felt that the risks were worth my sacrifice because I've said many times, "I wasn't living anyway... just merely existing."  I was willing to take the risk that something bad could happen.  It didn't luckily, and the odds are becoming less and less as the procedures are perfected...  but it is still a very present reality.

How do I see myself? I see me as a fighter...  determined.  Not willing to give up.  I'm also very human.  I am not "super wls patient" who never messes up.  I just keep getting up after my fall and trying to obtain a higher foothold.

Mel. your right other peoples hurdles can be a great reminder of the challenges we've endured. I still enjoy looking at the before and after pictures of others as a motivator and reminder. Thanks Bob

Great topic as I still can't see the changes in the mirror (that fat girl image) but I can when I see the pics. While I'm just six months out, I want to keep that day one momentum. How did I do it? Pre-op, I told EVERYONE at work (i work for a rather large company) what I was doing and while some were more supportive than others, it helps me b/c if i slide into old habits it will show and they will know it. That is enough to keep me focused.
I know lots of folks prefer to keep it private or don't share as much, but I'm a very open person.

this is my plan for the future and I'm praying it works. We're all human and have faced similar struggles or we wouldn't be here. I had a french fry last night and though it didn't make me sick, it tasted awful. whoo hoo!!