Lunch Bunch/Dinner Club Ponderings ~ Notice the smiling face !

While reading some of the post these last few weeks, I had a thought.  It seems we are truly blessed here in Nashville to have not only The Lunch Bunch, but also The Dinner Club.  Now I know that East Tennessee has tried on several occasions to get something started, but I feel good about this one coming up.  Now I read how Memphis has a group that gets together once a month.  WOW!!!!  Support is something we all need, and the more support you have, the better you are!

For all you veterans, and by that I mean anyone who has attended a Lunch Bunch type activity in your area, I have a few questions:

1) What was your first visit to this type of support group like?
2) What have you learned from these outings?
3) What advice would you give to a newbie on the Lunch Bunch Scene?

I just thought that would be a fun and interesting way to share!

So, here's my answers!

1) What was your first visit to this type of support group like?
Scary, but interesting!  I met some wonderful people that have truly become some of my best friends.  Some of these people are still active and involved, and some have moved on.  But it was really the beginning of my feeling good about my decision to have weight loss surgery.



2) What have you learned from these outings?
That my eating habits would have to change, but I that would be able to eat most items but only in moderation.  In fact, the title of my food blog comes from one of the Lunch Bunch gatherings that I attended.



3) What advice would you give to a newbie on the Lunch Bunch Scene?
Understand that the people you meet are just like you.  Yes, you have seen them on the Internet here on Obesity Help and it sometimes seems like they are  celebrities.  Don't place the people you meet on a pedestal, they put there pants on one leg at a time, just like you!



OK, who's next!

Scott

Well I'll jump in....
My first invite was from my good friend Scott aka computer guy.. It was held at Scott & Beth's church and was very informative.
Learned some computer skills from Scott and a multitude of great recipes.
One of my favorites was Freddie's strawberry crape's!!! Still think about them!!!
It was really important for me to put a real face with the written word. Words can be misunderstood when read, but when you meet the person behind the words you know the heart behind the words. C'ya Bob

My first lunch bunch was the one on February at Scott and Beth's church.  It was great!  Everyone made a point to come up and talk to my husband and me.  I learned a lot by just listening to others talk.  And, Shelia finding a pair of her old pants and then getting her entire body into one leg really made an impression on me.  My advice for newbies would be: GO!  The more support you find the better.  For me, I had surgery 4 hours from my home so I am limited to my sugeon supported group only once every 3 months.  The surgeon supported groups in east TN are not real welcoming of someone who had surgery elsewhere, at least the ones that I have attended.  So, having a group that I can be with that it doesn't matter who your surgeon was, or what kind of surgery you had, is a real blessing and something I desperately need.  That is why this message board is so helpful to me and why I am so hopeful we can get a east TN lunch bunch going!
Marilyn

My first Lunch Bunch was 2006. There were 4 of us: Susan, Kathy, Toni and me. All of them had surgery but I had not. I asked a million questions, and I was very afraid that I would not be approved by my insurance company. These friendships were very important but I did not realize it at the time just how important. When I found out that I was approved, these gals were so happy for me, and they knew the road that I was soon to walk. Susan helped me a lot in answering questions, and Toni even drove over to my house with a protein shake one day because I could not eat anything.  Kathy was just starting to see some person she met from the internet, and I enjoyed hearing her stories and glad to know that it was possible to get a date after losing weight (I had not had a date in years! LOL)

At another lunch bunch, I met Kym and Paula. These friendships would also prove to be VITAL because Susan, Paula and Kym held the first ever protein intervention (aka protein party). They invited me to Paula's house and whizzed up a ton of protein shakes. I think I only liked 4 of them, and I took notes until my hand was about to break! I took those notes home, studied them, made those recipes, as my life depended on them. Really, it did.

And now a few lunch bunch firsts:

I remember the first time I met Shelia. She sat across the table from me and her hair, I just remember how curly and blonde it was. She was quiet as a mouse, and sipping her Isopure. Now, that was a trooper, anyone who has ever tasted Isopure must agree! I think it was April or Misty who brought her some protein samples, and Susan coached her into some new protein choices and then she stopped her violent puking (caused by the Isopure).

 

I remember meeting Marie for the first time. There was a book club meeting in the next room, and when Marie came in, I thought, "she thinks we are the book club!" Come to find out, she was a wls patient! She looked so tall and thin and beautiful. I would never have thought she was a wls patient. I just kept admiring how pretty she was.

I also remember meeting Wendy, Marilyn and Bob (and spouses) at Scott & Beth's church. That was the day Scott attempted to show me how to post avatars, which I still can't do! I failed the class tutorial. It was nice to talk with them and find out where their weight loss efforts had gone, and how they came to the choice of wls.

There is one person who stand out the most in my mind. It was Jackie. She is so tiny, petite, and it was when I first met goal. I had NO idea in the world "where to from here?" and she brought me two pairs of American Eagle blue jeans. I got them home, tried them on, and they did not fit. I fell over trying to scoot into a pair! LOL. But what stood out was how small she was... and it helped me have a new goal... I kept going with my weight loss until I was "done" losing. She helped me go further than I originally planned, and I needed that encouragement, to see someone who had accomplished what she had.

I don't remember the first time I met Juanita and Misty. I have tried to remember, but it seems like they have always just been a very normal part of my life. There are just people who "belong" I guess... and these two gals surely fit in just perfect. They have been a great support to me, even in their quiet but strong (very strong) personalities.

Is it worth going to lunch bunch or dinner club? Yes!

I'm sorry to post again on this thread, but it was too early and I had to get my morning latte'!  And take vitamins, get a shower, weigh in, all the good stuff.

I wanted to add some more thoughts about the gatherings and what they have meant to me.

I really enjoy seeing the monthly transformations in each person.  You don't think that you change a lot in one month...  but when someone else sees you a month later, its like 'WOW, OH MY GOD LOOK AT YOU!'  It is an amazing difference!  We can all see the weight melt off one another, and that is so great.  We all used to share our monthly struggles daily on the board, and then we came together and its a concensus of "Now see, you went through all of that struggle, and look at you now!"  Its proof in the pudding so to speak, that the surgery and sacrifice was worth it.

I know, I say this all the time but my favorite memory of lunch bunch was the month we had the protein party at Mike's house.  You have never seen so many boxes of clothes for a clothing exchange in all your life!  Women were flinging clothes, hangers, plastic bags, all over the room and I have never seen so many naked people in my life!  It helped me too because I was just starting to experience sagging skin, and when I saw that others had the same "inhibitions" about getting naked in front of one another, and we all had our own issues...  but its like we really did all know what the other was thinking, feeling and experiencing.  Then those inhibitions got set to the side.  Everyone left that day with something - pants, shirts, shoes.  I think a few even ended up with bras.   Since then, the clothing exchange has been a big hit.

I also remember the clothing exchange where I was out talking to Alyssa in the parking lot while the clothing exchange was going on.  I looked down at the ground and exclaimed, "Oh my God!" and bent down to pick up something.  Alyssa asked, what's wrong?  I said, "My breast is laying on the ground!"  Yes, my chicken cutlet there for the world to see, had fallen out of my bra.  I just picked it up and then everyone just laughed.  Now what kind of group could you still feel comfortable with after having your left breast fall out onto the pavement?  Surely not your local church group!  LOL 

This is a pic of my first lunch bunch in Feb of 07. Wow we have all come such a long way. I remember the first face I recognized going into restuarant was Susan and she gave me a big hug and I felt right at home and at ease. I was very very qiuet. I'm not sure if I even talked. LOL
Yoou all have made such an impact on me and have been there for me when I had questions needed protein or just needed a friend. I have not seen this pic in a long time and it amazes me the trasformation each person in this photo has made.

Go**** has been so long ago Scott....

I know that Susan (as always) was there.  Toni, Laura (cant remember her last name) and a friend of hers, and i think April.  Gosh.  I really dont remember.  It was at a chinese rest. in madison.

I have felt like a family member ever since. 

In my two years on the board, there have been hurt feelings, attempts at dissention, and other times when folks took their toys and left to play by themselves.  I hate that for each one, but like every family, there will be times of trouble and growth.  The other support systems are fabulous and encouraged.   Keeping things in perspective is the key.

But we still chug on.  We will still have lunch bunch.  Even if only 2 people show up, it will still go on.  The reason this is so, is because it is needed and we all have learned so much!!!  Just like i learned that there are people here locally who are there when i need them and can call them at all hours with questions and concerns.  These dear people were a Godsend to me.  I have felt it an honor to be in the position to help others who have come behind me and I do say "pay it forward" because of the help offered and the blessing received.

For the new lunch bunchers:  WELCOME!   Be a SPONGE!  There are so many experiences and information to be garnered from those around you at each lunch bunch.  There have been times where totally different groups attend month to month.  Know that if you have questions or needs, let it be known.  We may not be able to provide all you need but we certainly can help and offer ideas.  Nothing is more fun than when folks open their trunks and clothing exchange begins.  And any questions about Protein...shooooooot!  We got THAT covered too.  But be aware, we believe in tough love and have no problem pulling you to the side and asking "what are YOU doing?"

I am going to do everything in my power to be at the Oct 11th lunch bunch.  I hope to see yall there. 

And the pic that Juanita put up (that chick standing in front of her that is tall with long curly hair, glasses and blue shirt and jeans...who is that???????????)  ROFL!

Well I put my thinking cap on to remind myself when my first Lunch Bunch was and I can not remember. Can someone help me out? I do though remember the first Dinner Club, it was the one posted above at Outback. I was scared to death, I was not use to going places and actually talking to people, people that I didn't even know. That was when I met all of those wonderful people, that I now call friends/other family. I remember it was Barb's first time also, I will never forget that night. Shelia was the first one to say anything to me, I told her that I was not a talker and she said that she would make sure that would change, well she did. I also, remember the clothes that I got that night. That wonderful dressy blouse that I got from Beth, gosh I got alot of use out of that one. I just know that I totally enjoyed myself that night and I was ready for the next one. Everyone was so helpful, informative about so much, it was a bit overwhleming, but it was all good. I remember that Freddie had brought samples of something for everyone to take with them, I missed out on that, by that time I'm sure that I was somewhere talking to someone......lol

All of the Lunch Bunch/Dinner Club's have been great I have learned so much from all of you. I only hope that somewhere down this road I am able to help at least one person the way ya'll have helped me.

Thanks so much,
Cheryl

My first Lunch Bunch was before it even had a name. LOL April and Misty will have to help me here. I know Misty was pre-op and I believe April was too.

Sometime early in 2006 April, Misty, me and a lady named Michele got together in the break room at the business owned by Michele's parents. I know that I did not yet have my braces and I got them 3 months after my surgery. We had met on the board and started talking about meeting people in the area face to face. Out of that invitation, 4 of us got together.

A few months later Kathy responded to a post by Toni on the board and said she would be in Nashville and would Toni like to get together for lunch. Since they decided to get together in Rivergate, I chimed in and asked if I could join them...then Melinda asked the same question. The 4 of us met at Logan's and had a wonderful time.

A couple of months later we decided to do it again. This time 4 of us met at China Garden. Other people then said if we did it again, they would like to attend also. By the 4th such meeting we decided to try it on a monthly basis and see if it took off. Can I just say, WOW did it take off!!!

The clothing swap started because Kym posted that she did not have a winter coat and she hated to go buy a new one since she knew she was only going to wear it one winter. A couple of us responded and brought not only coats of various sizes but other clothes she could shrink into also. It wasn't long before she was bringing those clothes back to pass on to another post-op. Since then I think everyone has been blessed with articles of clothing on the way down. And it is such fun to see something you once loved being passed on to the 3rd or 4th person in the group.

I have noticed this has slacked off recently. It is up those still changing sizes to keep this going. For me, this group was the perfect place to pass on the clothes I had undergrown. I was able to help others in the same clothing predicament I was in and always went home with at least a few "new" items myself. In fact, if anyone is needing 8's and 6's, I will bring them to the Lunch Bunch on October 11th. I think I have a few 10's also.

Over the past 2+ years, I have gotten recipes, protein ideas, clothes, clothes, clothes, and friends who understand the language of WLS and all of our quirks, gurgles, and excitement over the "little" things like moving out of the Plus Size department in stores. Where else can you discuss the strategic positioning of excess skin to best disguise it in clothing? LOL