Do I tell him????

O.K. I know I have been asking alot of questions the last few days and this one may seem crazy but if you haven't been in our shoes how do you know right....I go tomorrow for my first seminar my DH is going with me here is the thing I have NEVER told him how much I weigh. He has been at the hospital when I have had surgerys and I will write it down for the nurse that is how ashamed I have always been to admit that I am 232 lbs there I said it LOL but I am scared that there want be any hiding tomorrow so I was wondering if I should tell him ahead of time and get it over with or wait and let it be a surprise oh gosh I'm gettin sick just thinking about it I know it sounds crazy and I don't know why I am this way but I don't tell anyone!!!  I know deep down he want love me anyless it is just a number but then there is the what if!!!!

It's ok.  I have been doing the same thing all of my life.   Go ahead and tell him.  He won't love you any less.  I have always lied about my weight and got away with it.  But when I first told my husband he was surprised.  It was one of the "You weight how much!?" things.  But he got over it and so did I.  I told him I was embaressed to tell him.  He said he didn't know why I was.  It wasn't going to make him love me any less.  I have been honest about my weight since and he has never said anything else about it.  In fact he really supports me more in my weight loss adventure.  Don't let him be surprised at the seminar.  That would be worse.  And I don't think 232lbs is so bad.  I weighed 255 at my first surgery and am now 220.  Not much loss.  But when I have my switch I hope that will change.  I am with you in this step so be brave!

 

Susan

I meant to ask what dr are going to see.  I want surgery with Dr Spaw in Nashville.  I was thinking about Dr Husted in Ky but Nashville is closer and Dr Spaw is a member of Blis.   I am getting my band taken out since it has failed and going to do the DS instead.  I think that  this will be better for me.  If I had know about it two years ago I would have done it instead. 

Go ahead and tell him.  Weighing 232 isn't nearly as bad as weighing 299 or higher.  I wouldn't even tell my mother when I was on the scales, and I would weigh at a Doctors office and if I didn't like the number not even the nurse was getting the info.  After I had my surgery, I loved the scales and now I don't.  My pouch has stretched and I need a revision to tighten up the opening.  Easy procedure.  Let him know, he'll still love you and support you. 

Kathy the

I say go for it and tell him. He will still love you. It is not good to keep things from DH's or anyone else. Everything should be out in the open to discuss and help with each of our journey's. Keep us posted on your progress.

Cheryl

You should tell him. It is just a number. He sees you every day and still Loves and supports you. I highly doubt that a number will change his feelings towards you.  The day of my surgery I weighed 402 lbs. Can you imagine???  You have nothing to fear but fear itself. He will still love you regardless the numbers on the scale.

Sweet one...he sees you every day and loves you every day.  I felt the same way!  My husband has never even weighed 200.  When I hopped on those scales at 297...I figured I had to start somewhere!   It is just a number.  Do what you think is best but remember...there is more to you than that silly number!

Hugs!
Freddie

First, we don't mind questions!  Do we folks?  We love them, cause it opens up topics that get us to thinking... and remembering.  So ask away!  We will even tell you when we don't know the answers, where else will you find that honesty? LOL

And on this note, I just want to chime in with the others who said to tell your husband.  He will probably look at you and say "yeah?" as if it is no big deal to him...   He loves you very much I'm sure, and he will say "its just a number".  It is something very private and secret to us, something that we do not want to share.

I had to show my loose skin to my boyfriend.  He said "You don't have to do that." and I said, "Yes I do."  In my mind, it was the ultimate way to show him that I trusted him, and yes perhaps even to prove to myself whether he really loved me or not...  I thought, "If he can stomach the site of this, and stick around, then I will know that he loves ME."  It was very difficult, but something that I felt I had to do...  

 

Thanks everyone it is so good to know that there are people that know what I am going through and that have been there not just saying they do.  Will it come out at the seminar? I want have to get up and say it in front of everyone will I? Do they weigh you? Now my brain is racing and I do have a wonderful husband that loves me just the way I am but it's still hard and scary. He is also one of the people we love to hate he eats like a pig and weighs like 145 it killed him when he had to go from a 32 waist to a 33 but anyway 232 may not seem like alot to some of you but I am pushing all of 5'2" LOL .  I guess it goes back to the fear of failing and then my secret will be out forever but oh well I'll tell him or write him a letter or something LOL

No...the seminar is for information only.  Don't worry...it is just a meeting.  They don't weigh you or anything.  They just tell you about the different surgeries.