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Topic: RE: MELT DOWN!!!!
Why don't you tell your husband to log on here and go over to the Men's Forum http://www.obesityhelp.com/forums/men/ There's a lot of great guys there and he can go over there and get a lot of great "manly" support. It's a great bunch of guys, and they wouldn't mind at all. When I had my surgery, all of my family are out of state except for my wifes. In fact, none of my family knows I have had it done! I'm looking forward to going back to Kentucky and surprising a lot of folks. Then they can think what they want, but they'll see it for themselves (let them eat crow!!) I hope this helps a little.
Topic: RE: MELT DOWN!!!!
It is ok to have a total melt down, mine occured days before my surgery. I being in the health care field and knowing the risk, benifits, and failing already at the alternatives made the decision to have sugery.
I did not tell anybody but two friends at first. They had both knew I was contiplating the choice and knew I was doing what I felt best for me.
I had my Mom put my Dad on the phone the night before Thanksgiving. I premited the conversation by, I am going to tell you something and I am going to explain why I am going to do it. If you have anything negative to say, say it to each other after we hang up. I will be there for Thanksgiving tomorrow unless you feel that you can only say negative things about my decision. They were silent after I told them. I asked them not to tell anybody else. Wellllllllll my mom can not keep a secret and within a week I was getting calls about the same type of things others expressed.
I even had one friend who said, " I will be your biggest supporter but I dont understand why you can not do this the nautral and easy way". (you will hear some form of that statement a 100 times).
I also have those that are negative about my decision. There are a few things you have to keep reminding yourself 1) That you are worth it and deserve this chance to be healthy 2) They are in Ohio when you see them the next time you can WOW them with what you look like and let them be as jelious as they want. 3) They are correct about those that do not keep their weight off at times. However, if you follow the information your doctor gives you, eat well, increase your activity. You will be successful. Those that are not many times do not work on all aspects of their weight loss and go back to old patterns. The surgery is a tool to your weight loss not a magic wand.
Good luck and know we are rooting for you as the days to come.
I did not tell anybody but two friends at first. They had both knew I was contiplating the choice and knew I was doing what I felt best for me.
I had my Mom put my Dad on the phone the night before Thanksgiving. I premited the conversation by, I am going to tell you something and I am going to explain why I am going to do it. If you have anything negative to say, say it to each other after we hang up. I will be there for Thanksgiving tomorrow unless you feel that you can only say negative things about my decision. They were silent after I told them. I asked them not to tell anybody else. Wellllllllll my mom can not keep a secret and within a week I was getting calls about the same type of things others expressed.
I even had one friend who said, " I will be your biggest supporter but I dont understand why you can not do this the nautral and easy way". (you will hear some form of that statement a 100 times).
I also have those that are negative about my decision. There are a few things you have to keep reminding yourself 1) That you are worth it and deserve this chance to be healthy 2) They are in Ohio when you see them the next time you can WOW them with what you look like and let them be as jelious as they want. 3) They are correct about those that do not keep their weight off at times. However, if you follow the information your doctor gives you, eat well, increase your activity. You will be successful. Those that are not many times do not work on all aspects of their weight loss and go back to old patterns. The surgery is a tool to your weight loss not a magic wand.
Good luck and know we are rooting for you as the days to come.
Topic: RE: MELT DOWN!!!!
I'm so sorry your going through this, when right now you should be on top of the world and excited about your surgery. Your right, this surgery is for you and no one else. Most of the time when people are giving negative remarks it's because they are uninformed or in a lot of cases jealous. You can find bad in everything and unfortunetly people like to prey on the bad when it comes to this surgery. I work in the hospital and I see problems that occur in just about any surgery, even the most simple ones like a tonsilectomy, but you don't hear people talking about those because they are so routine and have been around for centuries. You probably won't hear these same relatives say anything about what obesity does to you and how dangerous it is when you have a list of co-morbidities that go with it. I had a lot of negitive remarks from people before the surgery also, but afterwards when they saw how I was losing the weight they seemed to be more interested in it and some were even inquiring about it for their own weight problem. My family was very supportive throughout this whole life changing experience. What ever you do,don't let these people influence your decision, you deserve to have a new you and regain your health. If I lived closer to you I would be more than happy to sit with your husband during your surgery, yes, they need support too, just to ease their fears. I wish you all the best god has to offer you and I know you will do great after the surgery. Just go into it with your head held high and know your doing something just for you, not the medling relatives. Inlaws can suck, I know, I have a mother-in-law that no matter what I do, it's not going to be right, lol.
I have had no problems since having the surgery, it was the best thing I have ever done for myself, and I would do it a million times over if I had to.
Take care and god bless!
Mary
IF WE WEREN'T ALL CRAZY WE WOULD GO INSANE!
Jimmy Buffett
Jimmy Buffett
Topic: RE: musc
I am so glad to hear you did great. I am going in next tuesday the 4th and need some courage. So you can access the internet in the room or do I need to bring my laptop? Let me know how you are doing.
I am so glad to hear you did great. I am going in next tuesday the 4th and need some courage. So you can access the internet in the room or do I need to bring my laptop? Let me know how you are doing.
103 pounds gone!!!! Yeah for me
Topic: MELT DOWN!!!!
Alright, I had a total melt down this weekend. I cried and cried. A few things threw me over the edge, I spoke with my sister in law in california, who was just going on about how the surgery doesn't work, people have died. Some of the famous people are gaining it all back. Then she told me that my mother in law knows about the surgery. This is the most negative person on the planet and I can feel all her negative energy from Ohio to SC. My mother in law has never wanted me in my husbands life and I am sure she is planning my funeral. Then I find out my two evil sister in laws in Ohio also found out about the surgery. Nothing good ever comes from these 3. My husband has no one here to talk to about the surgery, he is my support and is very scared for me, he wont show it but I know. I really hoped I could find someone in charleston that can sit with him during my surgery. My sister is going on a cruise. I am considering cancelling my surgery. I told my husband I need nothing but good vipes right now. Did anyone notice that their family really did not want to talk about it? I am so wound up right now. I just telling my self this is for me, no one else but for me. I know I cannot change how anyone feels or acts. I just need some positive thougths.
Alright, I had a total melt down this weekend. I cried and cried. A few things threw me over the edge, I spoke with my sister in law in california, who was just going on about how the surgery doesn't work, people have died. Some of the famous people are gaining it all back. Then she told me that my mother in law knows about the surgery. This is the most negative person on the planet and I can feel all her negative energy from Ohio to SC. My mother in law has never wanted me in my husbands life and I am sure she is planning my funeral. Then I find out my two evil sister in laws in Ohio also found out about the surgery. Nothing good ever comes from these 3. My husband has no one here to talk to about the surgery, he is my support and is very scared for me, he wont show it but I know. I really hoped I could find someone in charleston that can sit with him during my surgery. My sister is going on a cruise. I am considering cancelling my surgery. I told my husband I need nothing but good vipes right now. Did anyone notice that their family really did not want to talk about it? I am so wound up right now. I just telling my self this is for me, no one else but for me. I know I cannot change how anyone feels or acts. I just need some positive thougths. 
Topic: RE: musc
Dr. B did my surgery 2-1/2 years ago and I love him. He is very caring...but shoots straight from the hip...which is what I like best about him. Good luck and keep us posted on your progress.
Topic: RE: musc
Dr. Byrne did my surgery just over 2 years ago and it was the best decision I have ever made. It is normal to be scared. But you are in the best hands possible. You will love Dr. Byrne. They will take care very good care of you.
Julie
I can go the distance... I do not care how far... I know every mile will be worth my while.
My goal in life is to be as good of a person as my DOGS already think I am!
Julie
Topic: RE: musc
Hey, I actually got RNY done yesterday at her at MUSC. DR. Bryne did mine. It turned out great I was up and walking three hrs later. I am laying the bed right now in a room at the hospital u cant actually get online via the tv and a wireless keyboard. NEAT HUH!
Topic: RE: New Support Group - Dr. Bour's Office
the fee is a f**k joke. i needed support, paid for it and never got it. oooooo sounded *****y sorry 
Topic: RE: musc
Kaye,
Thanks so much for your reply. It really made me feel so much better. A nurse saying such great things about him is the best ok I could get.
Many thanks again.
ang
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