I wont fail

I used to write on other boards just to let out my feelings. I hope you can read what I write and relate. If you are new you can understand and if you preop you can learn ................... Today I looked back at the last 3.5 years and thought what have I learned ? What do I need to do tomorrow that will make me be more helpful to myself and others around me. I am not perfect I have failed from time to time. Have I learned from what I did wrong ? Was the surgery what I expected? What now ?    Weight loss for me before was all I could think about. In having the surgery I had dreams of one day a life withou****ching what I ate, not dreaming of food and even more days I could focus on diet and exersize......REALITY !!!!!!! never gonna happen..... I think now more than I ever have , WHY I dont want to be a failure....... I got one chance at this .... right now I have done the most drastic thing that anyone can do to loose weight, if this fails whats left? I dont want to be a failure.......... Exersize : God do I hate it....... but after loosing 350 lbs I have skin....... IN vane I tell myself that I will stretch my muscles in some area's to fit the skin......lol yea right...... but it keeps me motivated...... I now have been on a strict routine of exersize for 3 weeks I now miss the gym if I miss a day why? I dont want to be a failure.......  Bad Eating Habits, What the hell happened to the honeymoon? The Dr.s told us 18-24 months is the window of oppurtunity...I was to busy finding my new life , My new body...... I let it slip away.....Folks us that honeymoon once it is gone.... That is the true test to whgat you have learned....... The tool we have done to all of us is just that ...... We deep inside have the "Diet Training Wheels" on for only a short time...... I used them tossed them now I find myself on a unicycle...... I remember that time when 6 crackers and a slice of sheese made me quiver..... I remember the time when I forgot to eat...... well guess what honey its back...... I cant let iwhy....I dont want to be a failure...... What I have learned ..... Its simple Listen to others that are going through what you have or are going through..... Sometimes it better to walk than run..... Sometime it better to be cautious than run through life and not learn....Learn from advise ... yet be willing to be taught......I am not perfect...Yet I am not a failure....... With your strength , Kindness and enchoragement.... Failure will never be an option......... Hope all of you had a great weekend....... thanks for letting me post..... ron

verry well said !!I do not want to fail at this I have come so far God please dnt let me fail ,I bounce back & forth with 5 lbs & now with my head on straight again I am going to  try & ldrop at least 10 more to be in a comfort zone so I know I can do it I need to kick the carb monster to the curb gosh I love pringles got to find a good sub for them dnt know if it is the salt or what ,so I am drinking more protein & just going back to the bacis hope this helps ,good luck with everyone who is struggling with the last few lbs that needs to come off ,come on we can do it ,

18 months later and I feel the same way, I don't want  this tool to fail. I find it harder and harder, as the months go on to not think about food. Why does it seem to take more to fill me up now  than it use to? I too have been playing with the same 5 pounds, up and down, over and over again. I want so bad to lose 10 more pounds but, it seems such a struggle and no matter what I do, the weight won't drop. It reminds me of the old days, struggling to lose weight and forever thinking about dieting again. I guess it will never be where we won't have to think about it on a daily basis because with every morsel of food I put in my mouth, I have the fear of all my weight coming back on. I guess it's time for me to do the pouch test and see if that will get my weight loss going again. Thanks to both of you for letting me know I am not alone in this. Hugs! Mary

That was an AWESOME post. My fears are tremendous.  Mostly because, I am 26 now, And honestly I think about how LONG of a life I have ahead of me that I have to fight this battle to not gain my weight back. And it SCARES THE HELL OUT OF ME.  Does it prevent me from eating bad foods? No. Should it? yes! Its part of my overeaters obsession that I have had since childhood. I feel bad, I eat, I'm sick, I eat, I'm stressed, I eat.. I'm such an emotional eater its not funny. When everyone else in life fails me, Food is still there! And it doesn't talk back or judge me! LOL seriously I could teach an overeaters annonymous class, And I battle with it DAILY.  To think that I still have a good 50+ years of life to fight this battle, SCARES ME.

Guess this goes to show that we are not bullitproof we all bleed! I say.its not that we fail or.succeed but more. Important in what we learn from. Either!

I never post here, but do at times lurk. i must say that i always enjoy reading what you have to say. You are a true movtivator. You have a way of telling it like it is. This journey has been a wild ride. One year tomorrow. So many ups and downs...not sure how things will end up. For now like everyone else here, I am trying and hope to find some normalacy and happiness in my life. I always thought that only if i was thin ...then everything would be great. NOT But now I can't blame weight on my unhappiness... what is it then.... don't know. By outward appearences everything should be great. Was I happier heavy..maybe..who the heck knows. I wish that I would have done soooo many things differently. But all any of us can do is put one foot in front of the other day after day and hope that this is the day that I will learn how to be satified with what i have and who I am.

Thank you for your viewpoint