Bad news!

Hi, guys! I have some bad news that I want to share with you. Yesterday I had to contact Dr. Bour's office and cancel my enrollment in the program.  I had 2 support sessions left and was to meet with Dr. Bour on April 16th with surgery to follow sometime in May. Without going into a lot of detail, I will say that I have a 19 year old son (my only child) who abuses drugs.  I have literally tried EVERYTHING I KNOW to help him and have spent thousands of dollars to help him with rehab and such.  There was a rather serious turn of events this past weekend that has caused me to have to cancel the enrollment for now.  I don't see where going through a healing process  after surgery and dealing with the stress and personal turmoil will do me any good.  It would be difficult juggling the two...if you guys know what I mean. I am so upset and dissapointed that I can't even begin to explain it.  I wanted and needed this surgery and it rips me to pieces inside because I have never done anything for myself and I have devoted 19 years to bringing my son up in a decent home where there were never an influence with drugs and alcohol.  I have worked 2 and 3 jobs most of the time just where I could keep him in the nice clothes and shoes...and give the material things.  I know this is where I messed up and I blame myself for that part, but I feel cheated at the same time.  All I have ever wanted from him was to grow into a fine man and strive for a decent life...the same as everyone else who has kids.   I know that most of you don't know me, but if you would please say a little prayer...I would really appreciate it.  It is so needed right now.  I've known his situation is bad and I have offered help everyday, but I never saw this particular incident coming. I do plan to stay around here because I will eventually have it done and I want to see how the rest of you are doing.  I have been so excited that it was going to happen and now I feel like I've been pushed off a cliff.  I wish all of you guys good luck and great health. Take care and have a Happy Easter. Wanda

   I am so sorry to hear about this for you.  My husband and I have struggled for years now with this issue for my stepdaughter.  I totally support you for waiting for WLS.  The stress of the situation with your son would make it so hard to handle the life change that WLS is.  My heart goes out to you and I will be praying for you Mary

im sorry for the problems you are dealing with.. i pray that things will get better.

I will pray for you and your family but I just wanted to say that you not getting this surgery is not going to make you son any different. Sometimes its good to do for yourself. We have a family member that is a drug addict and for 10 years we have done everything possible to help but after all we have been through I am now a firm believer that you have to want help to be helped. I wish all the best for you and your family and hope that you find some time for yourself one day because its something we all need.

Wanda - without hesitation, I know everyone here is with you in thought & prayer! I am a mother of two grown daughters, but one in particular also has a problem with drugs & depression. So I can relate (in part) to you and the emotional toll this situation is putting on you.  Please know that there is ALWAYS help out there, even if it's just a silent prayer from a stranger. God will bring you thru - just let Him. Yours in Christ, Hellen

Hi Wanda, I understand fully. We do things for our kids and sacrifice ourselves all the time, even when they are almost adults. I have a 19 year old daughter and know emotionally this age is sometimes harder to deal with than infants! Good luck and hopefully in the near future you will be able to get back on track with your dream. STB

Wanda, I am so sorry you are going through this right now. I know when he comes out of this time in his life he will look back and thank you for all you have done for him. Hang in there... God brings things into our lives and we don't know why. Just trust Him and He will see you through. I will be praying for you and your son. I can only imagine how hard this is on you emotionally and physically. Please stick around here... we are still here for you... surgery or no surgery! Pam 

You are in my thoughts and prayers.  I hate that you had todo  that and cancel your enrollment.  Your son is very lucky to have your support.  - But I support you in your decision because you know your situation and family best. (not us).  Hang in there.  God timing is perfect and He is an on-time God.  Never late concerning his promises.   If  you need anything- we our all here for you Angela

I don't know you Wanda, but I can relate, I also had to postpone my surgery becouse of an emotional crisis in my family, it will happen for you, just hang in there. I will keep you and your family in my prayers, drugs are a terrible thing I think most families have issues with them my issue was my grandaughter that my son 16 had,we were raising her,well she was legally stollen from us and given up for adoption, the mom didn't want her and didn't want us to have her either. After I got some stronger I had my surgery and now I have more strengh to fight some more, it isn't final yet. I hope my story helps you to know that when the time is right it will happen. hugs to you, Sharon