Thursday Morning Rant (LONG)

Alrighty folks.  For my health, well-being and many other personal selfish reasons, I've decided to start a weekly thread where we ***** moan, whine and complain about random things that really annoy the crap out of us. I notice that alot of you women are Native South Carolinians, and true SOUTHERN BELLES.  I think you guys could use this.  You may have some trouble with the concept of this thread, but go ahead and LET IT ALL OUT!  I, on the other hand, was born and raised in Texas.  Though Texas is IN the South, since I have moved here, I have since learned that it really isn't "THE South."  SO I will have nooo problem with this. Here we go: 1.  If you drive a small car, a crappy car with mechanical probelms OR insist on going 30 mph in a 55 mph speed zone, do NOT cut me off.  I drive a heavy SUV, with airbags, good insurance and am probably going 5-10 mph ABOVE the posted speed limit.  I WILL RUN YOUR A$$ OVER!!  If I have to slam on my breaks I will probably call you a BAAAAD name.  ALSO,  if I discover you are talking on your cell phone when I pass you, you will probably get the finger too.  There.  You've been warned. 2.  Drive thrus are a rip off.  There is always something wrong with your order.  AND if you are going thru the drive thru of the McDonald's on Hwy 14 and Woodruff, you can pretty much guarantee that your order is going to be wrong.  You might as well say "surprise Me" when you pull up to order, because WHO KNOWS what will actually show up in your bag.  They know that if you are in so much of a hurry that you don't even want to get out of your car to get food, chances are, you will not come back to complain.  UNLESS of course, you have a whining 5 year old complaining that they gave her fries instead of apple dippers or a BOY toy (ewwww.)  and don;t een bother saying, "I will NEVER go back there again!"  Becasue you will, many many times.  Because let's face it, it's McDonald's and you have a 5 year old... 3.  What is the use of asking people "how are you?"  Because seriously, do you REALLY want to know?  Just say hello.  Not, "Hi, How are you?"  Chance as are, I will just say "fine" and that is not the truth.  I am trying to teach my child that lying is bad.  If I answered that question honestly, I would probably say, 'How am I?  Well, I'm premenstrual, I have horrible cramps.  I feel bloated.  I hate my job, my child got a note sent home yesterday from school.  There is something fuzzy in my right eye right now.  My shoes hurt my toes and I really need another cup of coffee."  Do you really care?  Probably not, so its better not to ask. That's all I have for right now. AND I FEEL SOOOOO MUCH BETTER!!!! Now, its your turn.  

Yeah I LIKE THIS ONE... ready... set... go... Not being a southern belle... and being from Cali to boot... im good at this!

1.  If youre gonna get on the FWY... THEN GET ON THE FWY. As a commuter, the worst thing ever is to get stuck waiting for some MONKEY going 35mph to merge!!! GET OVER YOU DUMMY BEFORE I PUSH YOU INTO THE DITCH!!!! 2. Just because my skin in tan does not mean that I speak Spanish!! Dont profile me because ur parents didnt teach you better! And I dont speak GEECHI either!!!! 3. Dont walk up to me and ask me if my kids are BLACK! You were smart enough to realize that I am their mother... so how could they be BLACK!!!  And its not OK to stike up a conversation with me simply because you see my children!!! There is no "WHITE GIRL WITH A BLACK MAN" club... contrary to popular belief 4. Not all Californias are liberals. Dont ASSume that Im some wild marijuana smoking hippy that doesnt wear a bra but has Gucci sunglasses... California is not like you see it in the movies! 5. If you live in or around St. George... DONT GO TO THE TACO BELL OR MCDONALDS on HWY 78. They are OK about getting food right, but the ladies are so FREAKIN rude you have to talk yourself out of jumpin thru the window to choke them as you sit and wait. And if you sit and wait and dont honk your horn... YOU WILL WAIT THERE TILL JESUS COMES BACK!!! LOOK LADIES... its not MY fault that your 37 yo working in a fast food restaurant... I DIDNT DO THAT TO YOU SO BACK OFF!!!! 6. I am NOT mean because I tell you LIKE IT IS. The truth hurts, but its far less painful than living a life of lies. And if you know me well enuf to ask me something, then you should know how I will respond. If you cant take the heat... stay outta the kitchen!!!

Love it Crystal, but its geechee.  I'll give ya a lesson if I ever get to meet you.   Mary

LMAO... OH! MY BAD!!! the other nite and fball game, some man (thats what HE thought he was) was trying to speak to me... and I was like "huh', "what?", "I dont get it..."

and another parent (who is from NY) started LAUGHING... and had to step in to tell the "man" that I couldnt understand ANYTHING he was saying....LMAO... so funny...

My Dad used to have a fleet of Shrimp Boats.  All of the shrimpers, no matter what color, had that geechee thing going.  Dad picked it up and when he's with his old friends, I don't understand a word my father says, its hilarious.  One of his boats was named the Geechee Gal. So funny, it was such a different world back then M

Alright ladies, I actually had to google "geechee." LOL!!!  I didn't even know it existed.  I wanna learn to speak it!!!

Just take her down to the Market in Charleston and let her listen to the basket ladies talking Gullah.  That will really confuse people, it does me and I am a native.

Julie

 

WAIT!!! WAIT!!! I THOUGHT GEECHEE AND GULLAH WERE THE SAME THING?!?!?!  ARE THERE TWO FOREIGN LANGUAGES!?!?!?!

Gullah is the dialect that the African American slaves spoke when they were forced here.  Lots of it has almost died out and there are actually classes and a center for the preservation of the language.  Geechee is sort of a low country accents.  Some parts of gullah, but not totally.   I can do the Geechee thing, but not the gullah. I love to freak out my husband's Oregon Family and talk like that and about how i'm heading shrimp and fixing venison for dinner

I like your style!  I'm a geechee from way back.  My brother owns Mac's Supply in St. George.  I grew up with him for 18 years but now can hardly understand his "St. George" accent.  He's a great guy and that store is wonderful!

I'd love to meet you ~ maybe you can come to one of our LCBB meetings on Thursdays sometime. Dollie