Advice before I blow.....

I am curious about what to say when someone tells you that you are taking the easy way out.  I tried approaching them about this subject but they gave me this long speach about how this is the easy way out....... I really felt ticked off and wanted to blow but did not and let the conversation drop.  Needless to say Most of the family is still in dark.  My mom, my husband and kids know, everyone else can bite me.  I come from a big family of 5 brothers and 1 sister, but I am confident that this is what I want and need.  So until my surgery is over I do not need their negativity.  What can you say to these people?

I didn't tell a lot of people at first, only the ones I knew woud be supportive.  I have told more and more people since I have been successful...and when they ask why didn't you tell me I say because I didn't want to hear any negative comments from anyone.  This is my body and this surgery has saved my life.  There is nothing easy about it....

  That was the hardest part of this surgery.  I just want to take all that say that, into my backyard and have a good 'ole fashion redneck barbaque. I ask them what part is easy?  The part where you have surgery and get cut on? The first month of not being able to eat anything you have to chew?  Or is it the baby food and pureed food?  Maybe it's the part where you puke because your pouch can't handle the food?  Or maybe it's the part where you have to walk away from that "bad Food" life style cold turkey, no soda's or sugar and crap?  For those that smoke, maybe it's the part where you have to stop smokin'?  Maybe it's all the excersizing you have to do to try and firm up and keep your heart healthy. These people that say that don't have a clue.  How much research have they done?  What Doctor's have they talked to? When I told a few people before surgery, the one's that were negative and had ugly things to say, I put months of distance between us.  Now, my progress speaks for me!!!!    My family supported me, even though some of them didn't want me to have it.  2 of my sister's were against it because I wouldn't be able to eat what I wanted and how much I wanted....DUH...that's what got me here in the first place. Now that the negative one's see how much happier I am and the benifits my body is recieving from it, I just grin.  (While they sit their everweight self there eating Little Debbie cakes and do nothing to help themselves, easy or hard). Do what you have to do for you.  Someone told me before surgery,  "Don't let anyone talk you into this, but don't let anyone talk you out of it either"!!!!!!!!! If staying away from the negative one's don't help, JUST POP THE $H*T OUT OF THEM, THEY'LL SHUT UP THEN!!!!!!!!!!

You don't have to justify your decision to anyone but yourself.  I think the whole "everyone else can bite me" is a GREAT attitude. But think of it this way.  All the diabetics, people with high blood pressure, people with heart disease, etc take medications to control their symptoms, when the same can be done with diet and exercise.  Are they taking the easy way out by depending on prescription meds? You are risking your LIFE by going through this surgery.  You are re-routing your digestive system!  Your life changes after this surgery and it requires WORK to achieve the weight loss, stay healthy and then to MAINTAIN that weight loss.  It isn't easy.  It just WORKS! This is your chance to be healthy.  This is chance to greatly improve your quality of life.  Being overweight is dangerous and deadly.   I think the people that claim this is the easy way out either have some sort of fear of losing us OR have some sort of fear of our success!  There are people out there that have something invested in you remaining overweight...even if it is just to make them feel better about themselves. Either tell them, "I am saving my own life.  I want to see my kids and GRANDKIDS grow up.  I want to be active and healthy.  I owe it to my family.  This is my opportunity and I am taking it.  I'm sorry you just can't be happy for me, but those are your issues, not mine." OR just don't give them the chance to speak about it.  You've made up your mind.  Who cares what they think?

Everyone is always trying to rain on someones parade. Not quite sure why... but it is what it is. My family goes thru spurts of "easy way out"... I dont pay them attention and neither should u! The decision is hard enough without having to deal with peoples negative comments.  As long as your making choices based on your PHI and your dreams... SCREW EVERYONE ELSE!!!  No one is going to live for you, so dont live for anyone else! OK... im off my soap box...... haha!

You just plain and simply ask them to try your way of life for a few days after your surgery... They won't be able to do that ... And say well yours was only a couple of days and this is my life forever.... OR if you're like me for 6 months I threw up every few minutes of the day... I asked my family if they would like to come hold my hair or wash my face when I puked... that was my life for 6 months and still some days now... Alot of people think it's the easy way out and they think it's a quick fix... but unless they can walk in a gastric bypass person's shoes they need to keep their mouths shut... Most of my family thinks I'm a failure since I'm only weighing in at 119 and not 95 pounds that is perfect bmi for my height... BUT I'm 40 years old, and to me 119 is too low for me as it is... So my long winded advice is this........... DON'T TRY TO PLEASE ANYONE BUT YOURSELF !! GOOD LUCK AND SURGERY WILL BE HERE SOONER THAN YOU THINK Stephie

wow I can say I know how you feel when I told my brothernlaw which is like my brother we are close he told me I took the easy way out I would have never thought he would have said anything so neg but let me tell you it hurt me so bad I cried for days IN NO WAY THIS IS THE EASY WAY OUT & I let him have it so from that day on I have told no one if they ask I will tell them but I am not putting my self out there any more I would do it over again in a heart beat but some ppl know how to hurt you bad& it is usally the ones you are the closest to ,good luck some ppl just are jealous good luck & be wise who you tell ppl are neg about this good luck

I just didn't tell many people at first.  As I succeeded with it, I began telling everyone because I was so excited.   A coworker who also had the surgery told my whole office that I was having it.  I just still feel like they are waiting for me to gain the weight back. Remember this is for you and only you.  It will affect those around you but as you become healthy, the ones who love you will be happy for you. Mary

i got that speech too. and i replied with no surgery is easy, regardless what it is. people will be and are cruel.

and probably jealous.

take it easy!

shelly