Please pray for me...

Deborah, I normally do not post but I read everyday. Your post touched me and it hit me in the heart. My brother was a "problem child" He was involved in drugs and who knows what else. My mother never gave up. She did everything in her power to help him, protect him and support him. I learned a lot from watching my mother over the years. Sometimes I would say, "Mom, just let him go." She would say, "He's my son, I will never let him go." Deborah, I will keep you and your family in my prayers and I hope that you can find him and bring him home. Do NOT give up and do NOT just let him go, he's your son. Beth

I understand. I just can't let go. I just can't. Thank you!!!

OF COURSE WE WILL KEEP YOU & SETH IN OUR PRAYERS, AS WELL AS YOUR YOUNGER CHILD. ONE THING THAT JUMPED OUT AT ME IS WHEN YOU SAID THAT HE IS GETTING DRUNK WITH HIS TEACHER ... THAT IS A CRIME & YOU NEED TO GET SOME LEGAL ADVICE ON HOW TO PROCEED IN A FORMAL &/or CRIMINAL COMPLAINT AGAINST THAT TEACHER. IF HE/SHE IS INFLUENCING YOUR SON (&, other children) TO GET DRUNK OR HIGH, HE/SHE IS PUTTING THE VERY SAFETY OF THOSE CHILDREN AT GRAVE RISK ... OF COURSE SETH & OTHERS ARE GOING TO FOLLOW THE LEAD OF A TEACHER WHO IS GIVING THEM "PERMISSION" TO DO STUPID, DANGEROUS THINGS INSTEAD OF LISTENING TO YOU WHO IS TRYING TO TEACH HIM WISDOM & RESPONSIBILITY. THAT TEACHER NEEDS TO BE STOPPED BEFORE SOMEONE DIES FROM THIS IRRESPONSIBLE, DANGEROUS BEHAVIOR & INFLUENCE. ONE OF THE HARDEST THINGS IN THE WORLD IS WATCHING SOMEONE SELF-DESTRUCT & KNOW THAT YOU REALLY CAN'T DO ANYTHING TO HELP THEM IF THEY WON'T HELP THEMSELVES. YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO STEP BACK MOMENTARILY, MS DEB. YOU'VE DONE ALL YOU CAN FOR NOW. YOU CAN'T RUN AROUND LIKE A CRAZY WOMAN; THAT WON'T HELP ANYONE. TAKE A DEEP BREATH & GET CENTERED. THEN YOU'LL BE ABLE TO MAKE GOOD DECISIONS ABOUT WHAT YOUR NEXT STEP SHOULD BE. WE LOVE & CARE ABOUT YOU, SWEETIE ... GOD BLESS YOU & YOURS ... DAWN & NICK

Thank you Ms Dawn. This teacher took Seth's life into his own hands. He knew he is under age, he knew he took meds that mixed with beer and stuff could kill him, he lied to me, and he drove drunk with him in the truck. I will do all I can to help burn him. At the same time, I will do all I can to get Seth help, even if it is through the courts. My job is to protect him, even from himself. Right? I know there will come a time when I have to let go. I just pray some of the values and morrals I have tried to instill in him, will surface by then.

I WAS SO GLAD TO READ THAT THE TEACHER WAS ARRESTED. KIDS ARE SO EASILY SWAYED TO THE WRONG SIDE, BUT TO HAVE A PERSON IN AUTHORITY BEING THE ONE INFLUENCING CHILDREN TO DO WRONG IS SO FAR PAST WRONG THAT IT IS PURE EVIL IN MY BOOK. YES MA'AM, YOU DO NEED TO DO WHAT YOU CAN TO HELP SETH .. & MOST OF WHAT YOU WILL DO WILL **** HIM OFF & HE WILL "HATE" YOU FOR IT, BUT THAT ISN'T REALLY THE WAY HE FEELS ... IT'S JUST HIS IMMATURITY. BUT YES, THERE WILL BE A TIME WHEN YOU WILL HAVE TO LET HIM GO ... OR, LET HIM FALL ... NOT THAT YOU QUIT LOVING HIM. THERE IS A SLIM LINE BETWEEN HELPING SOMEONE & ENABELING THEM TO DO WRONG EASIER. I WAS MARRIED TO AN ALCOHOLIC FOR 30 YEARS & AT SOME PLACE IN TIME, MY "HELP" BECAME "ENABELING" ... IN OTHER WORDS, I MADE IT EASIER FOR HIM TO STAY DRUNK & NOT FEEL THE CONSEQUENCES OF HIS ACTIONS BECAUSE I TOOK RESPONSIBILITY FOR WHAT HE WOULD NOT. THAT JUST MEANT THAT I HAD BECOME PART OF HIS SICKNESS & IT TWISTED ME AS MUCH AS ALCOHOL TWISTED HIM. YOUR SITUATION IS HARDER TO JUDGE ON HOW FAR TO GO BECAUSE HE IS STILL A CHILD (not that HE would think that of himself) & HE ISN'T FULLY ABLE TO MAKE WISE DECISIONS OR SEE THE FULL DEPTH OF CONSEQUENCES THAT HE MAY FACE DUE TO HIS ACTIONS. SO YES, AS HIS MOTHER ... YOU DO HAVE TO HELP HIM AS MUCH AS IS POSSIBLE UNDERSTANDING THAT THE OUTCOME IS STILL IN HIS HANDS BECAUSE HE IS THE ONLY ONE WHO CAN MAKE THE DECISION TO CHANGE & DO THE RIGHT THING. I WATCH THE PROGRAM "INTERVENTION" ON TV & THE RECURRING LESSON IN THAT PROGRAM IS THAT NO MATTER WHAT FAMILY & FRIENDS DO FOR THE "PROBLEM PERSON", NOTHING THEY DO WILL WORK IF THE "PROBLEM PERSON" IS NOT WILLING TO TAKE RESPONSIBILITY & CHANGE. WE CAN BE A GOOD EXAMPLE FOR OTHERS ... WE CAN ENCOURAGE OTHERS ... WE CAN OFFER THEM OPPORTUNITIES & CHANCES ... BUT WE CANNOT CHANGE THEM, THEY MUST CHANGE THEMSELVES. YOU ALSO HAVE TO RECOGNIZE WHAT THIS IS DOING TO YOUR OTHER SON ... THE "GOOD CHILD" USUALLY GETS LOST IN A FAMILY WITH A MISBEHAVING CHILD. IT'S LIKE ALL YOUR ENERGY GETS DRAINED OUT FROM DEALING WITH PROBLEM AFTER PROBLEM WITH THE MISBEHAVING CHILD & YOU HAVE NOTHING LEFT FOR THE GOOD CHILD WHO NEEDS YOU JUST AS MUCH. SO, THAT IS ANOTHER CONSIDERATION THAT SHOULD HELP YOU KEEP BALANCED IN WHAT YOU SHOULD & SHOULDN'T DO FOR SETH. THERE IS A SCRIPTURE THAT SAYS SOMETHING LIKE ... RAISE UP A CHILD IN THE WAY HE SHOULD GO & WHEN HE IS OLD, HE WILL NOT DEPART FROM IT. I FIND IT INTERESTING THAT THE SCRIPTURE DOESN'T SAY HE WILL NEVER SCREW UP (especially in his teenage years) ... IT SAYS THAT WHEN HE IS "OLD" HE'LL GO BACK TO DOING WHAT YOU HAVE TAUGHT HIM. GOD BLESS YOU ... DAWN & NICk

deb im sorry youre dealing with this.. hopefully he will eventualy realize hes not making the right choices and come to his senses. bad part is it usually takes something drastic happening for someone to realize that.. thats what happened with me at least when i was his age and doing bad things. it took a friend of mine getting arrested for alot of drugs and me having a horrible trip on acid at 17 for me to snap out of it .. i told the Lord that night that if i would ever be able to sleep that i would never touch it again.. and ive stayed away from all that. luckily i wasnt addicted to anything.. hope your son comes around im praying for you all! *HUGS* Jen

I remember what it was like to be young once. Maybe it's just me, but things are so much worse now. Even when I was doing those things we do when we were young, I was somehow smarter. I mean, I did graduate, go to college, have a good job and home and vehicle. I can't say that he has accomplished even one of these. He is so immature. I know he will come around, hopefully it will be before he has a police record. Thanks Jen. I needed that hug too!!!

Deb., I am so sorry. My prayers are with you. Please let me know what you need and what I can do for you and your family and Susan much love Mary

Thank you so much for your call. That ment so much. Right now the ball is in Seth's court. I just get scared of how he is going to bounce it next. He has so much life in front of him, and he honestly doesn't have a clue on life. You always know something else is coming, the question is when.

Deb, Please make Seth go talk to a counselor or someone of that nature. I know he just went through some things and that could be a big part of what is going on now. Also for the teacher thing....there are several lawsuits out there right now with College of Charleston and an upstate school and their teachers for participating/allowing those things to happen. And if it makes you feel better...I have learnt from the things my friends and family did and I know better not to do them or have them happen to me. With Love, Jennifer