i feel very FAT

have you had those days/weeks?!?!? im in a slump and i just feel FAT and awful. Then i eat something bad for me then i feel worse about it then get down on myself and eat something else bad for me! Its like the old fat girl habits.. that got me fat to begin with. Ive been going to the gym this week and im sure im gaining muscle bc im so dang sore and workin my butt off. .but then ill eat something soo stupid i feel like i did it all for nothing, and then the scale has moved UP this morning.. im worried! i think im plateued and the "Easy losing" is over with. i think im so stressed over issues in life right now that im getting depressed and its my only comfort i know to use like old times.. and i am obsessing over feeling so fat lately.. when in reality im not FAT like i used to be. but i still feel it. ugh.. then feeling so fat makes me eat! Rawrr its that old cycle back in my life again.. guess i should start taking my lexapro again so ill get out of this slump. hope everyone is having a better week than me! jen

I am right there with you. Its harder to lose weight and its really hard to stay away from the evil carb comfort food!!! lots of hugs Mary

It is VERY hard.. harder than i expected! Thanks Mary jen

Jen- I can totally relate to how you are feeling. I am doing the same thing. I start feeling sorry for myself and then the self sabatoge begins!!!! It is a vicious cycle. I turn to all the foods that we are not suppose to have and then feel guilty and eat more of them!!!! I would certainly get back on the Lexapro. I can really tell when I don't take mine. It keeps me much more level. When I forget to take it or just don't take it then the depression sets in and all the lovely things that go along with it. We are here for you if you need us!!! Melissa

Thanks Melissa its good to know im not the only one dealing with this self sabotage is the easiest and worst form of coping with stress.. which sucks. Im working hard on trying to stay on track and not let myself ruin this for me.. I can be my own worst enemy sometimes! Thanks girl jen

Jennifer, Congratulations on how far you have come in the last year. Your looking fabulous, you seem so full of energy when you talk about your dance class and working out at the gym, playing with your kids, and helping your father through this experience. Nothing looked as liberating as the other night when I saw you giving away your older pants that you no longer fit into. When you look at all the freedoms you have now, compared to a year ago, you also have to consider how much food means to you. I am really proud of you and I see you as an example of how people bloom from who they were to who they are. Dr. Russell was helping me with these same feelings. My fear is of slipping into old habits, not being able to overcome the old habits of mindless snacking and over eating through bad portion control. He recommended that I try to be self aware of when I feel weak and likely to eat out side the limits of the program. He also said to write down a list of two columns and note of what I like about being thinner and what I liked about eating. Then I read over the list before I give myself permission to have a snack. No sneaking or mindless eating, its either I chose to eat because the choice is a better option than living the way I live today or I decide not to. I read my list then I give myself permission to eat or I decide not to eat. We all know how hard the struggle can be and I know we all cannot be perfect. Going to the gym on a regular basis is a great milestone, I am proud of you. I am proud of your progress, and I admire you for being able to voice your frustrations and your concerns about what it take to make good choices and what a difference good choices mean in our lives. Your doing great, Herb

That was really nice Herb!!! Does the list seem to help you? Patti

I just started using that method this week, the first day it sort of did, I still ate over my 200 calorie per meal goal, but the last two days it has helped me keep to my 200 per meal goal. The second day I added a lot more positives and negative to my list. I just find it hard to throw food away, its an economic thing .. I think of it going to waste, but in reality if I go a head a finish off the whole portion and over load on calories, then it does go to waist, which is just as bad if not worse.

*Tears* that was so sweet and heart felt Herb! Thank you for such kind words. You all have helped me feel so much better about this especially knowing im not the only one hiding under a about my problems! Youre a great friend to have! And youre doing great as well!!! jen

Good to see you posting on here Herb!!!! I'm gonna have to add you as my friend!! Rachel