Felt so sad this weekend

I saw my old self this weekend, and it made me so sad.  I had to run out for diapers Sunday morning,  and as I was standing in line holding a box of diapers and a jack links meat stick,The woman in front of me was morbidly obese. Just glancing at her purchases sent me into my past.  There was a small pack of toilet paper,  and then 4 or 5 boxes of little debbies, some individual bowls of sugary cereal, 4 full size bags of potato chips, and other various snacks.  Her total bill came to over $40 and the toilet paper cost less than $10

I wanted to give her a hug,  but of course I don't want to get my ass beat for being rude or hurtful.  But the whole scene just really took me back to a place in my life that was not that long ago,  and filed me with an overwhelming sadness. 

I don't know why I'm posting this, I don't want to sound judgemental,  because I would never want to shame anyone or hurt their feelings. But it was so unhealthy and I think it was the first time since surgery I've seen something like this.  In the past I wouldn't have noticed, since my cart would have looked about the same.

I don't think you are being judgmental, just making an all so common observation.

I can just see myself going out for toilet paper (or diapers) and coming home with  $30 of junk food.  I've done it so many times,  and it broke my heart to see it from the other side.  

We all have done it. Buying double orders from Mcdonalds and eating one on the ride home. It is scary when I look back. I try to look forward not forget but not beat myself up for what I have done.

Oh I can so relate! I can't begin to sketch out all the different scenarios where I've 'watched my former self' in action.  

I've started noticing things like this too... One of my thoughts lately is how much money I must be saving by not buying huge quantities of junk food (multiply that $30 by how many times a week or month we would purchase it).  Now I buy healthy treats for my dog... and me :)

I'm not saving any money.  In fact, my grocery bill has increased. Plus, factor in the cost of protein shakes.  Eating healthy is not cheap!

Yes, a flashback moment that brings all kinds of emotions to the forefront. Early post-op, I turned around in a checkout line because of a mini panic attack when watching a young woman self-medicating herself with purchases I knew all too well.  Even today, I still glance down at my own shopping cart when I run into people like a known health care professional or WLSer.  I mentioned this at support group and saw nods---anyone nodding right now? 

Actually went grocery shopping and felt strang buying wheat bread for my oldest son and Fritos for the baby shower I helped host on Sunday. 

When I bought my kids Easter candy one year. I felt horrible doing it.