The idea of surgery terrifies me

What terrified me more than gastric bypass surgery was dying super, super morbidly obese (SSMO).  I am now living a happier, healthier, complication-free life thanks to a lot of people I owe to keep it that way.  Most importantly, I now have a chance to die at peace with myself no longer being SSMO (with no plans for a soon departure). 

No complications here.  I was another who put it off way too long.  Zero regrets.

I was worried about surgery also, but I was much more worried about dying younger than I should, about a lower quality of life, of leaving my daughter at a young age, and it helped to make my decision easier.  

Remember, when you are reading online and you hear about complications, these are going to be many more people who post about complications than those who post that everything went perfectly.  It's human nature.  It's like when looking at reviews online:  if you had a bad experience, you want to warn others.  If you had a good experience, it's much less important to get on and tell everyone.

It's not an easy choice, and any surgery has risks, but to me (and many others) it was worth it.

Thanks so much for putting that in perspective for me. The more I learn, the more I decide that I want this. 

I think the fear is rational. I mean most surgeries the choice to have it or not is not really an option, it's usually an emergency decision you make in a split second. This surgery is voluntary and your choosing it and the process takes awhile so you have plenty of time to over think and second guess yourself but in all honesty it's not any different than going through with a C-section or an appendectomy, etc... It's a life saving procedure all the same, obesity carries with it so many co-morbities that are detrimental to our health and from my research the risks aren't really any greater than many other abdominal surgeries. I'm 3 months post-op and have had no complications at all and might I add that I had more complications with my back surgeries than with my RNY. 

I had no complications. During the surgery the surgeon discovered a tumor on my gall bladder (benign), so my gall bladder was removed, too. So, added bonus! My recovery was fast and easy. My primary care physician tried to talk me into surgery for three years before I admitted to myself that I wasn't going to do it "on my own". Having the surgery was the best decision health decision I've ever made.

My fear wasn't surgery but being in a hospital room.  I have a fear of enclosed spaces.  I had surgery all scheduled and cancelled it due to that fear but then my A1c started climbing.  I sucked it up and had the surgery in December.  The first day was a breeze since I was drugged up. The second day I freaked out but a kind nurse took me out for a walk and I was able to calm down.  Went home the third day after a battle with a frozen bladder.  When I got home I was terrified that something would go wrong and I would have to be readmitted but nothing did.  I am since no longer pre-diabetic, no longer high cholesterol, no longer high BP, no longer snoring and I no longer shop for plus size clothes.  No serious complications and nothing but rewards.  Even though I know my fears are irrational they still are real for me but I would still do this again. 

I had a hysterectomy a year before RNY.  Deciding on that hysterectomy was hard!  It terrified me. I truly needed it, as my quality of life was so badly affected by serious bleeding and pain, and yet it took me more than a year of serious consideration and fear to finally go through with it.  It made such a difference right away.  I should have done it 10 years earlier.  My life would have been improved for an entire decade.

Meanwhile, I had never really considered WLS, then within a month after my hysterectomy, I started thinking of WLS.  At that point, it was like, "Ok!  I have now had a major body organ removed, and things went well! And I feel so much better!"  That made the idea of WLS much easier to face. It did take almost a year to do all the paperwork and insurance qualifying work for WLS, and at each step in the preparation process, it became clearer and clearer to me that this was a good choice for me--by the end, I saw it as my only path.

So, why don't you try stepping onto the path a little at a time?  Take a step or two, and see where that takes you?  See how that feels, see what you learn.  With each step of exploration, just decide what your next step is. Eventually things will become clear to you about what you want to do.  Don't let fear keep you from some kind of action.  Having WLS is a decision, and a big one.  What I realized was that NOT having surgery was also a decision.  Each decision could lead me somewhere: where did I want to go?  

Thank you so much for the inspiring post! I think that is the best way to do it. 

12 years out. No complications. My fear was dying from complications of morbid obesity