Hello! New to group

Hi, I have been on this road to durgery for oh, about 2 years. I finally went and saw Dr Pohl last Sept and sat through his meeting. Then I started little by little to get the process done. I finally got the insurance ok with a target date of Sept 4th. Today I go and see Dr. Pohl, I am not sure if he will give me a date or not at this point. I still need all pre-op testing and I need to be on the shakes for 2 weeks. (I tried the shakes about 6 months ago and was very faithful...and I lost 20 lbs.) I will take the shakes here and there, but have not been faithful to stick with them as I did the last time. (I did the shakes on my own - with Dr. approval - just to see if I could do two weeks of shakes)

Sometimes I eat anything I want out of rebelliousness to conformity. I know that is bad, but it is what got me here in the first place. I am really terrified to have the surgery (I am having the complete surgery...can't have the band, allergic to the nickel in the port)

I have 3 young kids and worry about there future, I have my husband, who is semi-supportive, he wants me to be healthy, but does not want to see me sick. I had surgery once, in 1999, where I had my gallbladder out, and it was an Open CCY, I took a long time to heal, and hurt for a long time, but I don't miss my gallbladder at all now! 

I worry about complications that I think you may not post here, I worry about the pain and the intense need to eat, that cannot be satisfied because of the small stomach, surgical disruption, vomiting, etc that will occur...but I don't see you writing about.

I do see many weight loss sucesses, happy with yourselves for accomplishing these goals...do most of you have to have comsetic surgery to remove the hanging stomach, what about your boobs? Is your body totally disgusting to you now? I don't want that...I want to look sexy and vibrant, not baggy and lumpy.

All I can think about is this: THIS IS PERMANENT...NO GOING BACK, NO DO OVERS. That is very scarry to me...and my kids. My 7 year old just said to me..."Momee, I do not want you to die, you are the best momee that I have!" Boy, did that make me cry! I think my 2 biggest fears are ONE: Dying...that is more permanent than ever! (yes, I believe in God and heaven, but who wants to leave 3 little kids without a momee?) (BTW "momee" is the way they have been spelling it since they could write, so I go with that spelling instead of "Mommy")
My second fear is the pain...and possible after surgery complications. On a scale of 1 to 10 how would you rate it? For example, I rate my period (1st day) at an 8. Maybe I am a chicken, but right now I need MEGA support.

This is it! I feel like "Dead Man Walking" !

All this from a nurse who has always been on the other side of the bed! What a chicken I am!

Thanks for listening to this crybaby!

~Daisy
Current Weight 278, 5' 0"
Married w/ children 9/9/7

Hello Daisy,
   Welcome to the group.  I was reading your letter here and you remind me of me. I had all the scares and worries you had.   Unlike you I have no kids but, I do have a loving husband that I would like to grow old with.  I started out with this  at the weight of 345lbs  much higher then you and have lost as of today 108lbs.  Nice huh!  I think so.  I think you can do this too  positive mind and the support of family , friends, and us guys here.  You can do this.

  I did have problems in the begining with vomiting only because I ate to fast. I learn fast how to slow down.   As for feeling hungrey,,  that did not  happen.  I had to remind myself to eat.  You don't get that feeling. At least for a while.   My fair was waking up sick from surgery and I didn't 1st time in a long time . I am the type that always wake up sick after surgery.  I remember asking the nurse if they did the surgery. lol..   Only because I was not sick. 

 I never thought about the skin after loosing all the weight.  From what I can see I am not doing to bad with that.  They say exercise helps that.  I was unlucky with the exercise bit for I hurt my hip and now going for a hip replacement so I had to stop the exercise out.  (just for now)  I will go back to it.  Now I had my surgery in april of 2008 and like I said lost 108lbs.  so far.  I sitll have a stomach and I am sure that will be the last to go.  always is. lol.   I am sure I will have some hangin in the stomach but,  the long term  is live over death.  That was one of the things you said in your letter you want to live becuase of the kids and family.   My boobs got smaller but as for drooping not that bad  a good bra takes care of that problem.  I will tell you some good points about this surgery.  NO more  High blood pressure  it went down since surgery  No more Chol. that went down since surgery.  I was taking something like 7 pills in the morning before surgery and now I take Vitamins and an anacid pill.  Now that is cool.  So not only do you get healthy with this surgery  you.  save money with medication and your food pill drops a lot. 

I didnt have alot of pain . I mean sure I woke up for surgery in pain but not that bad.  They give great meds for it.  I to also had Dr. Pohl. He is the best.  I woke up on the 4ht day sick because they changed my pain medication from one thing to another and my stomach could not take it so they changed it back.  Dr. Pohl kept me for 2 extra night to make sure I would be fine.  If you remember to walk walk walk and sip sip sip  you will be fine.  Do everything to the letter what Dr. Pohl tell you.  Always remember you have us all here to help if you have any question.  No question is a bad question.  Roger Willaims is having a support group on Thur the 28th  at 6pm if you want to meet any of us.  I will be there.  You can get an idea what life can be like after surgery.  

Oh yeah by the way you are not a crybaby.  your a MOMMEE....  love how you spelled that.

Your friend from here
Lisa

Hi Daisy!

Welcome to our forum! I also have Dr. Pohl.

I had my surgery June 4th. And boy was I scared!!! I was truly convinced that I would not make it out alive if I had the usual 24 hour severe vomitting I usually get from surgery. However, I'm here...I made it. No vomitting. And hardly any pain.

Like Lisa said, walk, walk, walk and sip, sip, sip! No matter how much it hurts, walk and walk again! Just don't over tire yourself.

I was home from sugery on day three. Day five I ended up back into surgery with Dr. Pohl with and obstructed/twisted bowel. THAT was the worst pain I've ever been through in my life and I've had all my kids naturally, no drugs (including twins)! The surgeon didn't do anything wrong during my RNY and I didn't do anything wrong at home. It was something that just happens to some people. It's just the way my bowel 'fell'. Now it's all 'pinned up' and workin' like a trooper!

However, when I awoke from that surgery, even though I was more sore than the first surgery and more tired. I walked and sipped whenever they told me to. I was home again three days later and still feel I didn't have that much pain.

I have four children of my own and two step children I raised. I also have three grandchildren. I surely did not want to leave them without a Mom or Gramma. But I was even more sure that I would not have been around for the long-haul if I kept creeping on the destructive path I was on.

I can't say that I'm ever feeling 'hungry' in the true sense of the word. I know my pouch & body is hungry when I start to feel nauseous and a bit light-headed. I try not to let that happen by eating every five hours or so.

I do, however, feel head hunger a LOT of the time! What a pain in the arse that is! I have to consciously think about what I'm feeling and about what time I last ate in order to determine if I'm 'head' hungry or really physically hungry. Usually, it's 'head' hunger.

For instance....

When I'm driving, when I'm watching a movie, late at night when I'm watching tv, when I'm P'd off, when I'm bored, when I'm lonely, when I'm really tired, so on and so on.....

What do I do when I feel this?

Sing really loud, sip, dance in my living room (cane and all), sip zero cal drinks, get up and do something other than watch tv, sip some more, go to the park for a peaceful sit-down or walk, just keep sipping, go to the gym, try on some saved size 28/30 jeans and ask myself "was it worth it?" And the answer is always a resounding YES!!! Would I do it all over again....YES!!!

In less than three months, I've lost over 62 pounds! Gone from a size 28/30 to a size 16!!! My cholesterol is no longer a factor, I no longer have GERD, I walk better, my blood pressure isn't high anymore, I can breath better, I'm not as depressed as I used to be, in fact, I can say I'm not depressed at all now (knock on wood), I have less pain in my neck, shoulder, lower back, hips, knees and ankles.....I could go on and on.

My family benefits because I'm more active, more happy and more motivated to go places and do things! I am starting to be able to play with my grandchildren! I'll be able to go to ALL of my daughter's games and meets this year!!!

And all this, not JUST because I had weight loss surgery but also because of the truly wonderful friends I have met along the way! Not everyone has sad stories to tell but we ALL had to hit our own bottom with our food addictions and chemical imbalances and physical dis-eases!

I hope you can make it to the support groups and the extra on-the-side home get-togethers we have!

We're having our 9th annual Labor Day picnic Saturday (rain date Sunday). PM me if you would like to come. Several of us from this forum will be attending!

Glad to see you here!

Your new friend,

Jules

Hi Daisy and welcome!  I did not have RNY so I can't not speak to the complications potential or otherwise.  I will need plastics when I am done.  My boob are hanging, but they were hanging before I lost weight.  My stomach, legs and arms are hanging a bit too, but really they were before they were just filled with fat.   People here are pretty honest and have written about issues and complications (maybe read some older posts) I would suggest to go to some of the support meetings also. 

We are a very supportive group and we welcome all questions and comments. 

Happy Researching!

Hi Daisy - welcome to the RI Board. You have found a great place to come and ask questions, receive support and meet great people! We are all friends and have a great time together.

Your fears are completely normal. I too, thought a lot of the same things. I can say that I had RNY on October 23rd 2007, I've lost 197 lbs and I feel wonderful! I have not had any complications other than the usual boughts of certain foods not agreeing with me. Many people ask me if I would do this again and the answer is always "YES!!!!!" I'd do it again once a month, hell, once a week for the rest of my life if I had to - this was the best thing that I've even done for myself and I'm so glad that I made this decision.

Jules is right - sometimes the head hunger can get the best of you if you dont focus 100% but my goal in having this surgery was to be normal - not to never eat anything out of the guidelines etc.

Good luck - knowledge is power - read as much as you can while making your decision!

~Laura