I need help getting back into the right mindset!!

alexia3
on 5/12/08 7:19 am - N Scituate, RI
I am MISERABLE, depressed and basically a whiny *****!  I have not gotten on my scale (but have been on several different ones in doctors offices lately) and we all know how different those can be!  I got on my scale the other day- and I have GAINED back 5 pounds!!!  I can't believe it!  All I want to do at this point is to crawl into a hole!!  I am getting in my water, my protein, eating as I should, went over my diet AGAIN with my NUT.  With as drastically as my calorie reduction is, I still should be losing- and definately NOT gaining. I am a complete wreck over this!  Keep thinking what a mistake I have made, how I am failing at what I worked so hard for.  I know I chose the surgery that would have me lose slower, but am now finding it so hard to be happy for others losing so quickly when I am failing.  All I keep thinking is what a mess I have gotten myself into, I was healthier before surgery, now I am having all sorts of issues, plus this d#$% pain from my port, which at times, can be so sharp it takes my breath away. I go for a fill under fluoro on Weds.  At that point he can see if there is an issue with the port, and if not, do the fill.  When he felt for it in the office the other day- he could not feel it, so opted for the fluoro.   I know my attitude needs to change, but things are SUCKING right now.  I don't feel like being the cheerleader!  Please give me the kick in the head I need at this point!

islander
on 5/12/08 7:39 am - Middletown, RI

Not to worry.  Weight gain like that can be from many things- hormone levels, water retention, variations in scales, etc.  So quit weighing yourself. 

Even when I was youger & my skinny self my weight could vary as much as 5-7 lbs. in a day.  I lose very slowly- 1-2 lbs. wk.  and I've had stalls.  So what.  It's better than I was doing on my own before the surgery. 

Sorry that you have not been feeling well.  No wonder you are in a bad mood & this lousy weather doesn't help either.   It's bound to get better.  Beating yourself up is a losing game. The excess weight didn't come on overnight & neither will the loss.  Oh, well.  I keep telling myself it's better for my skin. Good luck!

alexia3
on 5/12/08 9:47 am - N Scituate, RI
Thanks! I am hoping for better- but this funk SUCKS.  I am sure it is partially my cycles are all screwed up, along with everything else going on.  I really just needed to get this out and get some guidance!

Julie Nolan
on 5/12/08 7:42 am - RI
Beth! Don't be so hard on yourself! We all have good days AND bad days. Some even seem to just link into a really long chain. Remember,,,,you've already broken your chain!!! Just by reaching out on this board, you're already in the process of changing that negative mindset! I'm really glad you're reaching out. So many things can fluctuate for us including, what we ate last night, monthly visitor, drinking/not drinking fluids, salt intake, STRESS, etc. Even our bodies just saying "hey, wait a minute...are you starving me?"............You know the deal. I'm sure that when I get to this point (as we ALL do no matter which surgery we decide(d) upon), you'll be saying the same things to me. Meanwhile, we're here for you for any venting you need to do. I hope your port is alright and that Wednesday will be a day of continued weightloss for you. Please let us know how you're doing. I really care about you! Jules

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alexia3
on 5/12/08 9:52 am - N Scituate, RI
I am hoping it may be stress, coupled with hormones.  I hope all goes well on Weds, and we just find out that I am a big whiny crybaby over nothing. Thanks!!

Kim W.
on 5/12/08 9:58 am - Greenville, RI
Everthing will be OK... You have come so far..be proud of that!! Good luck on Weds.and please let us know how everthing is.. Take Care Kim
Jennyo35
on 5/12/08 11:42 am
Think of all that you and your body have gone through in the past few weeks.  Not to mention all that goes on in your head (that's what is starting to scare me).  Something I have read along the way . . . maybe it was Khaliah Ali's book talked about a slight weight gain following surgery, but I truly believe that things will get better for you.  You have a Dr. with a terrific reputation and as long as you stay committed and motivated things will get better. I cannot imagine your frustration right now.  I would just assume with the cut in the calories just from the post-op diet that the weight would start to slowy melt away but things I guess our bodies are much more complex than that.   Good luck Wednesday - maybe that will bethe reassurance that you need to keep pushing on. Jen

alexia3
on 5/12/08 11:45 am - N Scituate, RI
Jen- have you met with Robin yet?  Or it that this week?? I think I may need to get myself a copy of Khaliah Ali's book.  It was actually an article by her that led me to this site.

alexia3
on 5/12/08 11:45 am - N Scituate, RI
thank you.  I will let everyone know how I made out

Jennyo35
on 5/12/08 12:03 pm
I am seeing Robin on Thursday morning and Dr. Roye (hopefully) on Friday afternoon.  Thanks for the referral.  I'm pretty excited about meeting her and getting some real information.  I've done so much research on my own, but nothing can take the place from sitting across from someone and actually getting the information from them.  I'm sorry that I didn't make my appointment with her from the start, but just gald to be tieing up this one last piece. Khaliah's book was pretty good.  I picked it up from the library a few weeks ago and it was quick read.  It was a story that so many people can relate to.  her issues with food and family growing up, yo-yo ing in weight and then her surgery.  What was interesting is that her surgeon actually had the procedure himself.  It was definately worth reading.  I also picked up a cook book with recipes tailored for WLS.  Some of the recipes had some ingredients that you may not have around the house, but for the most part there were several really good ones especially if you like to cook.  so many recipes call for fresh herbs so I'm planting an herb garden.  

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