Better, but I still have improvements to do. B: Starbucks hot chocolate with NF Milk and No Whip S: small amt of M&Ms L: Grilled chicken S: Peanuts (too many I am sure, but a better choice than of late) D: Hardboiled egg, Apple Cinnamon Fiber One Muffin, 6 oz juice S: a few multi-grain chips Lots of water! And I exercised tonight too, and did physical therapy this morning.

Alyssa, I'm so sorry you are having such a rough time of things..no one should have to endure what you've been going through! I truly hope all your medical issues get resolved soon, so you can start enjoying being a "twenty-somehthing". This should be one of the best times of your life!!! Wishing you well, Marla

Today was a self-imposed liquids day and I did really well. B: 16 oz. of milk S: yogurt L: soup at hand S: CIB D: more soup at hand I am tired and going to bed. Have a great night everyone!

Yeah... it's been rough for me, that's for sure. I am surprised at how bad it has been for me... but I keep thinking it could be worse... but I don't want it to keep getting worse!

Well, it's obvious I am still pretty depressed and she wants me to keep working with the psychiatrist to find the right antidepressant (none so far have agreed with me). I am not someone to cry but I was fighting it the whole time I was in the exam room. Then we talked about my weight (I was up 10 pounds from last week). She thinks it is time for me to go to an endocrinologist. I have so much muscle weakness and joint stiffness, she wants me to see a specialist. My TSH level was normal the last time it was checked (like 8 months ago), but there are other ways to check it I guess. I don't know. My doctors have wondered about my thyroid since I was a little kid, so maybe they are still wondering? Maybe the endocrine doctor will think it is nothing? Weight has always been hard on me. Even with my band, I had to take extreme measures to lose the weight. I would eat around 1100 calories (under what the dietitian said for my age, height, and activity level) and exercise hardcore about 2 hours every day. I would burn almost as many calories I would consume and that was the only way to lose the weight. I am so grateful that I did, but without the exercise component, I fear that I won't lose at all (even when my diet, hunger, and restriction were "perfect", if I couldn't exercise for a period of time, I would not lose and even gain a pound here and there). I just don't know why my body holds onto weight and food like it does, but it drives me nuts She was relieved to hear about my HH and repair date. It's making my asthma worse and due to the constant reflux, I am always hoarse and clearning my throat. It will be great (and strange) to feel relief from that surgery! I wish someone could just heal me overnight. The muscle weakness for example: I was walking from my car to class with a backpack on. I had to carry a book in my left arm. By the time I got to my classroom (not far), my arm was burning and shaking due to the book being too heavy. I just can't figure out why I am so weak. There really aren't any meds that could do that and no meds cause water retention (so that can't be the reason for the weight gain). My face is puffy and my weight gain is mostly in the belly... so my clothes that I got 2 weeks ago are too tight in my stomach region. It's driving me nuts. My body is just so exhausted and my internist is just hoping that the stress of the stomach problems will make it easier on my body. I mean, I am forgetting things (like where I park my car, why I got up from my desk, what the professor just said, what I was saying, etc). My mind is so foggy and again, no meds are not really responsible for this forgetfulness. Lack of sleep killing my brain cells now? I mean, geesh, I am too young for this memory trouble! My internist is again hoping that the lack of sleep and trauma on my body from the GERD and vomiting will improve more than just GI and asthma symptoms. She hopes that the weakness and memory problems will improve after surgery. But, just to make sure nothing gets missed, she wants me to see an endocrinologist. She was thinking about endocrine problems a few months ago and now with the weight gain and weakness, she wants to follow through and explore all aveunes. She also started me on Lyrica for my bladder nerve issues. Maybe that will help me? Neurontin is pretty common for IC, but I couldn't tolerate it. So, we are going to try this nerve pain med. So... we'll see... Just though I'd give you guys yet another update... and I needed to vent a bit. I am so frustrated. I just want to fall asleep and wake up feeling like a normal 24 (almost 25 year old). Sorry for being such a downer this last year. I am just so tired and I don't want to burden my dad all the time with my health problems. You guys are a wonderful support group! Again, sorry to be such a downer... but I need some support, kind words, prayers, etc. Thank you from the bottom of my heart!