Recent Posts
Topic: I think I'm going to lose it.
I am so f'in stressed out, it's scary.. The past few days with Siehara have been pure hell. It started on Mother's Day... The day started out great! Neil and I had gone out the night before and as I slept in, he went out and bought me flowers and a card. The day for all of us was quite nice.. very relaxing, he made dinner.. etc..
Later on at night, things weren't going the way she wanted them to.. she started screaming at the top of her lungs..... all kinds of yelling, cursing, throwing things.. arguing back and forth, etc.. out of control behavior (on her part and yes, on mine) I shut down and went outside and smoked a cigarette while she was screaming in her room.
Monday morning.. didn't want to get out of bed.. Neil came to help.. more screaming, arguing, cursing, etc.. she threw her water bottle at me --open-- in the bathroom--when I was trying to get her to take her pills. She also spit at Neil and got physical with me.
Last night.. scheduled to work at the store.. I was so upset from the events of the past few days, I couldn't function. The woman who had worked ALL day saw how upset I was and told me that she would stay for the rest of the night and I could leave. I did not come right home.. I went and sat in a parking lot just decompressing for awhile and then went to Wegman's for chinese food and a frappe.. came home around 8.. shut down
This morning, more of the same.. did not want to get out of bed.. more of the same.
I made a call last night to Kids Peace because we have an appt with her therapist tonight. I want to get in with the therapist AND the psychiatrist at the same time. If we have to go back at 9 after they are done seeing all the other patients, I will do that. I need to do something. The mood stabilizer is NOT working.. she's worse than ever.. I've been reading some things and am convinced that along with the bipolar, she has Intermittent Explosive Disorder. Something's got to give.
I am at wit's end and have been out of control just as much as she has. This is not going to help the matter AT ALL. If I am out of control, there is no way I can get her under control. I hate being here with her because I never know what is going to happen next.
There are many more details than just what I have written, but I just don't have the energy to write it all. I feel like such a terrible mom because I can't keep myself in control and can't stand what it is doing to our relationship.
Later on at night, things weren't going the way she wanted them to.. she started screaming at the top of her lungs..... all kinds of yelling, cursing, throwing things.. arguing back and forth, etc.. out of control behavior (on her part and yes, on mine) I shut down and went outside and smoked a cigarette while she was screaming in her room.
Monday morning.. didn't want to get out of bed.. Neil came to help.. more screaming, arguing, cursing, etc.. she threw her water bottle at me --open-- in the bathroom--when I was trying to get her to take her pills. She also spit at Neil and got physical with me.
Last night.. scheduled to work at the store.. I was so upset from the events of the past few days, I couldn't function. The woman who had worked ALL day saw how upset I was and told me that she would stay for the rest of the night and I could leave. I did not come right home.. I went and sat in a parking lot just decompressing for awhile and then went to Wegman's for chinese food and a frappe.. came home around 8.. shut down
This morning, more of the same.. did not want to get out of bed.. more of the same.
I made a call last night to Kids Peace because we have an appt with her therapist tonight. I want to get in with the therapist AND the psychiatrist at the same time. If we have to go back at 9 after they are done seeing all the other patients, I will do that. I need to do something. The mood stabilizer is NOT working.. she's worse than ever.. I've been reading some things and am convinced that along with the bipolar, she has Intermittent Explosive Disorder. Something's got to give.
I am at wit's end and have been out of control just as much as she has. This is not going to help the matter AT ALL. If I am out of control, there is no way I can get her under control. I hate being here with her because I never know what is going to happen next.
There are many more details than just what I have written, but I just don't have the energy to write it all. I feel like such a terrible mom because I can't keep myself in control and can't stand what it is doing to our relationship.
My tracker
hers 
Topic: Terriffic Tuesday Roll Call
Good Morning PA!!!!!
The sun might not be shining but for me today is still terriffic. Last class last night. The instructor didn't keep us late - we were all very surprised at that. We all went out after class invited our spouses to join us since they were such a huge important part of our success. Before we left the building for the last time Gene took a class photo that I still have to download and email to all in my class. After that we went to a nice place in Rosemont called The Garden, wonderful conversation, wonderful time of sharing and laughing!!!
Today I'm off to work. Will be leaving early today, 2ish, to head to St. Joe's for the walkthrough for the banquet we have yearly at work. This year my company is able to give out 60 scholarships to the members of our healthplan. This is soooo exciting, I love this program so much.
Sending prayers, hugs, and love to all Beth for her dad's hospitalization.
Hope you all have a wonderful day...
Ida
The sun might not be shining but for me today is still terriffic. Last class last night. The instructor didn't keep us late - we were all very surprised at that. We all went out after class invited our spouses to join us since they were such a huge important part of our success. Before we left the building for the last time Gene took a class photo that I still have to download and email to all in my class. After that we went to a nice place in Rosemont called The Garden, wonderful conversation, wonderful time of sharing and laughing!!!
Today I'm off to work. Will be leaving early today, 2ish, to head to St. Joe's for the walkthrough for the banquet we have yearly at work. This year my company is able to give out 60 scholarships to the members of our healthplan. This is soooo exciting, I love this program so much.
Sending prayers, hugs, and love to all Beth for her dad's hospitalization.
Hope you all have a wonderful day...
Ida
IdaMae
Topic: RE: Suggestions
Effexor works for me. I don't contribute my weight gain to my meds because even after WLS I love to eat.
Good luck and I hope everything works out well for you.
Good luck and I hope everything works out well for you.
Topic: RE: Suggestions
Hey there,
This is a timely question. I just went off Cymbalta, which worked great for me, but my kidney specialist thinks it was causing a problem with the sodium level in my blood. So, my psychiatrist switched me over to Celexa, and I am just building it up in my system. While on the Cymbalta, I was able to lose 30 pounds.
I have bipolar disorder, and have been on a variety of meds, including a mood stablizer, an anxiety med, and of course antidepressants. I was most stable on the Cymbalta, Geodon and Buspar. I am hoping that the Celexa kicks in soon, and helps. Right now, I am a mess.
If you ever want to talk, I am here. PM me, and I'll give you my phone number.
Hugs,
Trish
This is a timely question. I just went off Cymbalta, which worked great for me, but my kidney specialist thinks it was causing a problem with the sodium level in my blood. So, my psychiatrist switched me over to Celexa, and I am just building it up in my system. While on the Cymbalta, I was able to lose 30 pounds.
I have bipolar disorder, and have been on a variety of meds, including a mood stablizer, an anxiety med, and of course antidepressants. I was most stable on the Cymbalta, Geodon and Buspar. I am hoping that the Celexa kicks in soon, and helps. Right now, I am a mess.
If you ever want to talk, I am here. PM me, and I'll give you my phone number.
Hugs,
Trish
Seek always to do some good, somewhere. Every man has to seek in his own way to realize his true worth. You must give some time to your fellow man. For remember, you don't live in a world all your own. Your brothers are here too.
Albert Schweitzer
Albert Schweitzer
Topic: RE: Barix Langhorne, Post Op Support Group, Wed 5/16
Looking forward to seeing you!
My Mantra is that I do not determine my success by the number hanging in my closet, nor will I let the scale determine that success either. . . It is through trial and error I will continue to grow and succeed. . . Laureen
"Success is a journey, not a destination." Ben Sweetland
Topic: RE: Barix Langhorne, Post Op Support Group, Wed 5/16
I'll be there!!! I'll be there!!! I'll be there!!!
"No matter how hard life may get, no matter how many curveballs you are thrown, keep in mind, if you want to succeed - QUITTING IS NOT AN OPTION"!!!
Topic: RE: Monday Monday Monday - roll call
Sorry to bring up th rear today. I have been an anxious wreck since noon. I have Keystone HMO, and need referrals for specialists. Up until now, I have not had a problem keeping them up to date. Unfortunately, I spent two weeks in April in Michigan, then all of last week there as well. I have been on an antibiotic for over a month because of a sinus infection. I'm scheduled to see the Ear, Nose, Throat doc tomorrow, so he can look at the films of my CT scan. Today, I get a call from them telling me I need a new referral. My primary doc's office requires 48 hours notice for referrals. I left them a message begging them to make an exception, explaining the whole thing. I have to wait till tomorrow morning to find out if they did it. They send referrals electronically.
Prior to my retirement, I did not need referrals. Since I retired, I pay for COBRA medical insurance, and Keystone is $150 a month cheaper than Personal Choice.
Sorry to dump my woes. I desperately need to keep this appointment.
Hugs,
Trish
Prior to my retirement, I did not need referrals. Since I retired, I pay for COBRA medical insurance, and Keystone is $150 a month cheaper than Personal Choice.
Sorry to dump my woes. I desperately need to keep this appointment.
Hugs,
Trish
Seek always to do some good, somewhere. Every man has to seek in his own way to realize his true worth. You must give some time to your fellow man. For remember, you don't live in a world all your own. Your brothers are here too.
Albert Schweitzer
Albert Schweitzer
Topic: Suggestions
Hi all
I haven't posted for awhile. I was trying very hard to get my life in order. I have started all the steps and even though I am still on rocky ground I have taken steps.
Question to the group. I am seeing a psychiatrist this week and am going to ask for a change of medications. I have suffered with depression for well over 35 years. I have never stayed on top of it thus my getting to a point where i didn't want to go on.
I have been on many different anti--depressents and of course the doctor is the only one who can diagnosis me and tell me what he feels is best. BUT, I know that with mental illness it is ofter a crap shoot, a try and see.
I don't need to keep putting weight on. I want something that doesn't increase my appetite but also I need something that gives me a push. If I had my choice I would sleep 23 hours a day but that is not going to happen.
I read that U of P is doing studies on post menipausal woman using ADD or ADHD drugs and they have been having success.
PLEASE I will liisten to what the doc says but would love to hear any stories out there. If any of the oldies from the boards could share their stories I would appreciated it.
I don't want to post this on facebook as I feel that my craziness doesn't need to be broadcasted on such a social forum.
Any suggestions, stories or ideas are very welcome.
Thanks in advance.
I haven't posted for awhile. I was trying very hard to get my life in order. I have started all the steps and even though I am still on rocky ground I have taken steps.
Question to the group. I am seeing a psychiatrist this week and am going to ask for a change of medications. I have suffered with depression for well over 35 years. I have never stayed on top of it thus my getting to a point where i didn't want to go on.
I have been on many different anti--depressents and of course the doctor is the only one who can diagnosis me and tell me what he feels is best. BUT, I know that with mental illness it is ofter a crap shoot, a try and see.
I don't need to keep putting weight on. I want something that doesn't increase my appetite but also I need something that gives me a push. If I had my choice I would sleep 23 hours a day but that is not going to happen.
I read that U of P is doing studies on post menipausal woman using ADD or ADHD drugs and they have been having success.
PLEASE I will liisten to what the doc says but would love to hear any stories out there. If any of the oldies from the boards could share their stories I would appreciated it.
I don't want to post this on facebook as I feel that my craziness doesn't need to be broadcasted on such a social forum.
Any suggestions, stories or ideas are very welcome.
Thanks in advance.
Topic: RE: Barix Langhorne, Post Op Support Group, Wed 5/16
You can go for supplies anytime they have hours. . . so far as I know
My Mantra is that I do not determine my success by the number hanging in my closet, nor will I let the scale determine that success either. . . It is through trial and error I will continue to grow and succeed. . . Laureen
"Success is a journey, not a destination." Ben Sweetland
Topic: RE: Barix Langhorne, Post Op Support Group, Wed 5/16
i am not able to make the next two meetings. boo! i might just stop by to get some protein though. hubby does quoits on weds and it starts this week and june saturday we will be away. i have the little one on weds night and i definitely know she doesn't need to be there. do you know if i can just go to barix to get supplies or do i need to call first?
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