Just saying hello!

Hobbitgirl
on 5/6/13 8:28 am - PA

Hi Trish!

I will find you on Facebook, thank you so much for the invite!  I actually was going to blog about this, but since I'm on here right now, guess no better time than the present!

The last 2 weeks for me have been beyond difficult.  At my last visit, my nutritionist told me Aetna changed their "requirements" recently and now I have to submit a food journal to her, as well as had to sign a contract to lose 5% of my body weight before surgery.  Now, in her defense, she doesn't want to have to worry about that, and she told me if I don't lose it, it doesn't mean I won't have the surgery, but to have the food journal as back up is going to help.

Because of this, my stress level rose to a level I wasn't expecting, and with getting off caffeine over the last month, all I do is SLEEP.  I am falling asleep at work, falling asleep at 8:30-9pm at night and sleeping all night until 6:30 the next morning.  I am going out to my car and sleeping during lunch.  And I got on the scale and it says I gained 7 pounds in the last week!  HOW???  I don't know what I did wrong, and I feel sick at heart that she's going to think I'm not pulling my weight (no pun intended), and I feel like a child who is ready to get in trouble.  I just want to cry, and I'm feeling bloated, but all I do is drink water and tea.  Nothing else.  No soda, coffee, alcohol, nothing.  And it didn't help I got into a big fight with my mom, who in the middle of a heated talk with her, came out she is against this surgery, and that I'm being lazy, and that this is the easy way out.  And that I have severe "behavioral" issues that need intense psychotherapy, that I'm addicted to food, etc etc etc....It cut right to the core, and I haven't been the same since.

Anyway, I'm sorry for letting loose like that.  But I feel like I had a setback and I don't know where.  I truly believe I would be in a much better state of mind if I wasn't so tired all the time.  Even with a little exercise, I am exhausted after.  This isn't like me, and I'm worried.  But, I'm afraid to talk about this stuff, out of fear people will think I'm not ready for this.  I've been waiting for 6 years to do this.  July cannot come soon enough!

 

Hobbitgirl
on 5/6/13 8:31 am - PA

Trish,

I wasn't able to find you on Facebook.  Maybe you could find me?  I am under as Bridget Mulhall. :)

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