What am I eating???
Why does a sense of helplessness make me want to eat? Is it an empty feeling? My daughter, Sheila, age 19, is in the mental hospital again due to her depression. She has been diagnosed as bi-polar with schizophrenic tendencies, along with OCD, an anxiety disorder, and she cuts. I think she was mis-diagnosed years ago and, obviously, the medications they have her on do not work to control her depression or anxiety. I'm seriously frustrated with the whole field of psychiatry at this point.
Sometimes I feel like the worst mother in the world, because I don't understand these disorders. I sometimes feel she is just crying out for attention. I worry about her ability to hold down a job or maintain a relationship. I get selfishly frustrated when I have to lose time from work or sleep to deal with her mood swings which lead to lots of psychiatrist visits, therapy visits and hospitalizations. She does not drive, so she cannot take herself to these appointments.
I am experiencing guilt, fear, frustration, and irritation. I'm short on patience, understanding and compassion -- all the things I think I SHOULD be feeling instead of what I AM feeling. And the urge to eat is powerful, even after I just finished my lunch.
I had to share it somewhere. Thanks.
Sometimes I feel like the worst mother in the world, because I don't understand these disorders. I sometimes feel she is just crying out for attention. I worry about her ability to hold down a job or maintain a relationship. I get selfishly frustrated when I have to lose time from work or sleep to deal with her mood swings which lead to lots of psychiatrist visits, therapy visits and hospitalizations. She does not drive, so she cannot take herself to these appointments.
I am experiencing guilt, fear, frustration, and irritation. I'm short on patience, understanding and compassion -- all the things I think I SHOULD be feeling instead of what I AM feeling. And the urge to eat is powerful, even after I just finished my lunch.
I had to share it somewhere. Thanks.
Blessings, Jill
WLS 5/31/07. Maintaining a weight loss of 141 pounds and feeling amazing!
Jill,
So sorry you are going through this!! As a mom myself, when you can't help your child it is the most frustrating thing to deal with!!
I am here for you!! Call me if you need to talk!!
my cell is 215-917-3388
I am actually home today....I needed some time to myself!
HUGS, Beth
So sorry you are going through this!! As a mom myself, when you can't help your child it is the most frustrating thing to deal with!!
I am here for you!! Call me if you need to talk!!
my cell is 215-917-3388
I am actually home today....I needed some time to myself!
HUGS, Beth
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Isn't it amazing how our emotions and the pressure/"should haves" that we have in our lives, can easily bring on the feelings of wanting to eat? I know that feeling all too well!! I am so glad you shared it here because geting it out, will most often stop you from acting on it. At least that is what it does for me. The good thing is, you reached our before reaching for food. That shows so much!
I am sorry you are going through all of this. Do you journal at all? I know that for me, it has really helped to get all those feelings out "on paper" even if electronically.
Just my two cents but I totalllllllyyyyyyyyyy understand!!!!!!!!!!!
I am sorry you are going through all of this. Do you journal at all? I know that for me, it has really helped to get all those feelings out "on paper" even if electronically.
Just my two cents but I totalllllllyyyyyyyyyy understand!!!!!!!!!!!
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