Mild Monday Roll Call

I can already tell it will be a nice mild spring day today. Not sure how sunny it will be but enjoy.

Sunday, I experienced something pretty cool. I went to Radiance in Lancaster where they had a visiting practioner for the weekend and I had an Angelic Healing Session. Sounds hokey I know but hey I am open to all things right now. The woman who did it was a very kind soul, her hands burn fire when she touches you and you cannot help but feel something. She laid hands on me and told me that my energy was drained, I was apathetic, and overwhelmed and that there were people pulling on me from all directions. I had anger and fear stuck in my abdomin and that it needed to be released. She put her hands on my chest and arm and she began to weep and she asked me " do you want to know everything? Even dark things? " I said yes because that was necessary for healing, ( i of course am thinking that she is going to tell me i am about to die lol ) she put her hands back on my and I was overwhelmed with her grief for me, and she began to tell me about the abuses i remeber and some i don't. She surrounded us with healing light and she began to tell me how I can heal. " the angels" told her that I had found the person ( therapist) who would help me and that I needed to listen to her and find a way to break free. They told her that I needed to set limits with the energey drainers in my life. She said that she could see me walking away from my career very easily. But that I am the type of person who does not turn my back on others or abadon them and that it would be hard for me to do so.

I came home pretty tired, I laid down in a sunbeam, and napped, and then moved to my bed and napped and I did feel peace. I do now today feel sad. but I know that is ok. I am thankful to my dear husband who took care of all of those THINGS i felt needed to be done but could not bare to deal with on Sunday. He cleaned did laundry and did not even ask if that is what i needed. he knew I needed to not have that on my plate. I love that man.

On and on it went, she gave me suggestions etc. I wanted to cry and fall apart so badly but would not allow myself. I need to connect my emotions i realize this. All of this is to say and not to be too personal, that for those of us that have developed our armor from fat, need to find a way to heal. The surgery does not do this.  We develope addictions, dysfunctional relationships, walls, and all of these things do not go away under the surgeons knife. I challenge you to find your own weights that are holding you back and do whatever necessary to break free.

Today is Monday, still tired. working on finding a way to energy. Should be alright today. I hope you all will have a fabulous day.  I wil be adding two links for you to see here one is from the lady who i met with Sunday and another is a workshop I will be attending on April 30th if anyone wants to come along let me know.

http://www.angelichealings.org/

http://radianceinlancaster.blogspot.com/2011/03/realizing-me -within-me-saturday-april.html

Good Morning Nicole and PA,

WOW! It sounds like this lady was REALLY good for you!! You deserve to have peace and serenity in your life. You are such a sweet and giving person so you only should get the best!! I guess that is why you have Jason.


Today is wor****il 3:30 unless we have a meeting then it will be 3:45. After work I am going to try and see my folks for a bit, stop at the apple store, come home, dinner, homework and I am going to try REALLY hard to fit in some type of exercise today. I am trying to recommitt myself to eating right and exercising. I know I am not where I should be so there it is!!

Have a great Monday!

Love to all,
Beth

P.S. HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO BETH CUMMINS!!!!

 WOW, Nic.. she really nailed it huh.  I got the chills reading it and knowing, even in small part, just how accurate she was.  

I'm barely functioning this morning after my crazy weekend.  It seems that no matter how much sleep I get on a Sunday, Monday morning still does not agree with me.  My breakfast consisted of coffee prepared with CLICK for protein.. yup.. espresso IN my BOLD coffee.  I'll try to add extra water in today to make up for it.  

After work today,  I am going to relax a bit.  Depending on how I feel I would like to get to zumba.  But, my back is sore so we'll see how that goes.  I'll get down on the floor and try to stretch it out so I can get there.  I won't be able to get to Body Combat tonight and I am disappointed by that, but I have a Sisterhood Meeting scheduled so duty calls.  

I'm hoping to make the meeting a quick one so I can come home and get back to bed early to catch up on sleep and hopefully get back on track for tomorrow morning. 

Good Morning Nicole,
Thank you for your honesty, and candor.  I am glad you got in touch with your pain, and have started your personal healing journey with your new therapist.  I know you will reach your goal of healing,  in time.  I have had my share of abuse, and have been in therapy for a long time, dealing with borderline personality disorder, binge eating disorder, alcoholism, and now bipolar disorder.  It has been a long time, because I was resistant to change for a long time, and there was a ton of Daddy transference to work through.

Monday has me finishing some tidying, because the Munchkins are coming to visit, and I must have this place in better shape than it is.  My daughter is a tough critic when it comes to clean.  Both she and my older son have horrific memories that are triggered by clutter and disorder.  I was a lazy slob when I was at my borderline worst, and they associate clutter with those bad memories.

Sorry to babble.  I am psyched about the kids coming.  In addition to the Munchkins, Mom and the rest of the clan will be here for dinner. 

I am hoping the day stays nice, so we can take a walk down to the river.  It is so pretty down there in the Spring.

Hugs,
Trish

Nic, she sounds amazing, how great that you found her.  I would love to attend the event on the 30h, but I have to work on Saturdays.

Hope everyone enjoys the warmer weather today!!

Peace,

Deb 

Nicole,
Thanks for sharing in your post!  It sounds like that lady was in tune with you and your current issues.  When I read your post i realized ther were a few things I wanted to say to you.  I think that we create our own energy and it starts with our attitude and frame of mind and I would encourage you to release yours.  Its there!  People dont take our energy, they can only absorb what we have already released as part of our shining!  Its not a limited pool of energy but rather something that is continually powered from within. 

Secondly, dont hold back.  Let it all go!  Whats the worst thing that could happen?  If what you're doing now isnt working its time to try something new.  You can do it.

Swede

Swede you are right we do create our own energy and others cannot take it if we dont let them.
being in the helping profession finding that balance is hard. But doable. Next time I find myself on the brink as I did Sunday? I wont hold back. god help them LOL. But as always it was a lesson learned had no idea how hard I was working at holding the emotions in.  Lesson Learned Got it.

Good morning all - Nicole, many prayers and well wishes coming your way as you work through your struggles - I'm glad you met someone who understood your pain and is helping you heal.

I am at work - my pain is purely physical - just sort of achey again today. Have PT this afternoon so that should help.

Yesterday I went through my mom's old desk - that was pretty draining emotionally for me. A lot of it was just old tax returns and bank statements, but there was also a lot of medial stuff in there and it just hit me at long she had been ill and how much she must have suffered in silence, because most of the time she really was a trooper when it came to going through her treatments and doctor visits, etc. I laid down and took a nap after that.

Got a couple of items onto Craig's List yesterday - we'll see how they do. Also put some books on half.com. Trying to start the cleaning out process of the house so when it does come time for us to move it won't be too overwhelming.

Hope everyone gets a chance to get out and enjoy the lovely weather we'll be having today.

Kathy

Kathy I can only imagine how hard that was for you. I remember you saying something about a treadmill, what kind is it and what kind of shape is it in?

The treadmill is a Pro-Form 785TL Low Profile - Space Saver. The unique thing about this treadmill is that it has a 13" color cable-ready TV mounted on it. TV works great - treadmill works, but needs a front roller assembly (makes a lot of noise). My neighbor said they're not expensive and are easy to replace, but we just never got around to it and I know I won't be taking it when we move. It folds up and is on wheels to move it.

I have it posted on Craig's List with pictures - I'd attached the pictures here but I don't know how!