An Incredibly generous offer...

SPatel4
on 8/31/10 11:51 am - Levittown, PA

I just saw my father who BTW lives less than 20 minutes from me but unfortunately I don't get to see more often. Anyway to make a long story short after I lost over 100lbs and started thinking about plastic surgery but could not afford it (at least in this country) I became obsessed with how could I come up with a way to save enough to pay for this. I get sooo upset that I have a permanent muffin top and on most days I am okay with that but 6 out of 10 days I am not.

Anyway my dad surprised me and told me he wants to pay for my plastics!! Say what? I don't want to take this money from him but my dad just got an inheritance from his parents' estate and it's just me and my sister and he told me everything they have is for the two of us. My dad will be 73 September 23rd but still works because he likes working. I rather my dad buy his own place instead of renting but he thinks renting is the best in old age. I am in a quandary should I accept this incredibly generous gift? or should I just learn to live with my "imperfections"? Any ideas? Suggestions? What would you do?

 
-Shilpa

People comment on my over 100 pound weight loss and attribute it to my WILLpower, but it is my WANTpower: I WANT to be thin and healthy more than anything else! 

 

kgoeller
on 8/31/10 12:22 pm - Doylestown, PA
As a parent, it gives me a wonderful feeling to be able to do something incredibly nice for my girls... especially something that would otherwise be out of their reach.  My recommendation is to graciously accept your dad's generous offer in the spirit in which it was made.  Help him experience the joy of generosity.

Karen
SPatel4
on 8/31/10 11:42 pm - Levittown, PA
Karen,
Thank you for the advise and I think I will take him up on it BEFORE he changes his mind. LOL

 
-Shilpa

People comment on my over 100 pound weight loss and attribute it to my WILLpower, but it is my WANTpower: I WANT to be thin and healthy more than anything else! 

 

(deactivated member)
on 8/31/10 2:36 pm - Santa Cruz, CA
I'd say to take the offer;  you would be happier, and your father would be so pleased to see that he has been able to make your life better.  Would you rather wait until his passing, and then know that he wouldn't be able to see how happy and pretty you are? 

Parents love us, and they love to give us presents.  Take it and give him a big hug and kiss and say "Thank you" with all the fervour you can give.

What a sweetie!
SPatel4
on 8/31/10 11:41 pm - Levittown, PA
Lynn,
I agree my parents are the best and the sweetest people around. My dad truly is my hero...

 
-Shilpa

People comment on my over 100 pound weight loss and attribute it to my WILLpower, but it is my WANTpower: I WANT to be thin and healthy more than anything else! 

 

Lisa H.
on 8/31/10 3:00 pm - Whitehall, PA
Hey Shilpa.. first of all congrats on losing over 100 lbs.  I don't know if I ever knew how much you lost.  That's awesome.

I'd say accept the offer.  Like was already said, your dad wants to do something just for SHILPA.  This is a present that he cannot give to anyone else.  It is special. He wants to share in the joy you will have once you get rid of the muffin top.  I know it brings you grief and if there is a way that you can make it better, go for it. 

By the way, I have to agree on the whole renting is better at his age.. at my age, too..lol.  Why should he have to do home maintenance and deal with the stressors of a house.  Let him live comfortably while other people keep up the place for him. 

Let him spend the money on you.  You deserve it and he obviously agrees or he would not have made the offer.

My tracker

hers 

SPatel4
on 8/31/10 11:39 pm - Levittown, PA
Lisa,
Thank you so much! You are such a sweetie and I agree I feel like being selfish and doing something just for me. That does not make me a bad person and I am not going to feel guilty about it.

 
-Shilpa

People comment on my over 100 pound weight loss and attribute it to my WILLpower, but it is my WANTpower: I WANT to be thin and healthy more than anything else! 

 

Nicole0216
on 8/31/10 8:02 pm - Lancaster, PA
Shilpa you know your Dad best and the dynamic of your relationship. If this is truly a gift with no strings attached I say go for it. Unfortunately I know sometimes gifts do come with strings. Jasons mom will make a grand gesture and then he will pay for it, so he has started refusing.

I am sure your father is not like that. So I say go for it
SPatel4
on 8/31/10 11:38 pm - Levittown, PA
Nicole,
Thank you so much for the advise your professional opinion mean so much to me and I agree this gift would not come with any strings attached. My father told me the look on my face when he told me that he would pay for my surgery was thank you enough. It was priceless he said!

 
-Shilpa

People comment on my over 100 pound weight loss and attribute it to my WILLpower, but it is my WANTpower: I WANT to be thin and healthy more than anything else! 

 

Maura M.
on 8/31/10 8:12 pm - Yardley, PA
If your father wants to do this for you, you should let him.  Karen said it the best, it would give him great joy to see you so happy.  If it doesn't break the bank and doesn't leave him indigent.. go for it.

That's an awesome dad!
Maura

        

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