Passion. 2 1/2 years out. ???
Not ONLY will I let you know if I find the answer, I'll write a book, make it into a movie, and turn myself into a million dollar woman and share the wealth with all my friends here :)
Thanks Bethy! You DO listen really well, and I appreciate that!
Thanks Bethy! You DO listen really well, and I appreciate that!
Instead of complaining that the rosebush has thorns, be happy that the thorn bush has roses. 
You've gotten some really good advice so far, which I'm not going to repeat. Nor am I going to blow glitter and butterflies up your butt - you have Brian for that ;-) - and hey, what you guys do in bed is your own business... sounds kinky to me, but....
Seriously, I'm going to go all "older sister" on you here. Being 47, married 22 years, and in my career for (omg) 26 years, I have a slightly different perspective now than I did when I was in your shoes. I think our personalities are very similar - we certainly seem to think alike in a ton of ways. I find it really hard to sustain the level that I'd describe as "passionate" about things for an extended period of time. That used to bother me and make me feel like I was doing something wrong or missing something critical in me or in my life.
Think about the typical relationship - you meet the person and sparks fly. You can't WAIT to spend every second with the person (to the exclusion of pretty much everything else) and your world revolves around interacting with them and making them happy (and hopefully, their world does the same thing). Over time, the newness wears off and you settle into a more balanced and comfortable life where your heart still skips a beat when they call, but you can concentrate on your work day and enjoy a night out with the girls without your partner. You both get on with your lives - pointing in the same direction, lookout outward together AS partners, instead of focusing inward at each other. Periodically, you each do something positive to "shake it up" (a romantic weekend, flowers for no reason, a "hot date night", etc.) That combination of things is what sustains the relationship over time.
Life AND career are a lot like that. It's OK to not feel passionate about your job or your life routine every day. When you start feeling that lack of passion in a sustained way over time, though, you need to start looking at alternatives. You've been working ER exclusively for some time now in 2 different places. How do you recharge your nursing batteries? Would it be more rejuvenating to have 2 DIFFERENT types of nursing jobs? One on a surg floor and one in ER? One in a doc's office and one in ER? What is it that really turns you on in nursing... be specific... and look for a position that features that, but then find something that complements it. So if you thrive on the adrenaline rush of an emergency, which is why you love ER work, maybe look into riding an ambulance a couple of days a week or getting flight nurse training to supplement. If you love the interaction with patients, maybe a charge nurse position with the elderly would be a good supplement. Change it up in your life - and that's OK. It will help you sustain the passion for nursing.
I started out my career (as an English major with minors in comp sci and medieval languages) writing computer documentation... which morphed into programming systems to deliver documentation to remote printers using the internet (which wasn't even the internet at that point, it was DARPANET - yes, I'm dating myself)... which morphed into designing and creating online documentation... which morphed into internet-based training systems... which morphed into website design and programming... which morphed into .... you get the idea. There was a direct correlation between each of the morphings because I was following a passionate idea of something I was really enjoying in what I was doing at the moment, and developing that area until it led to something else. I've never been "bored" in my career (except once, leading up to Sept 11th, and that turned out to be the best morph of all) because I've allowed myself to continually redefined and explore. It can be scary to do that (especially because I've always been the primary breadwinner), but it keeps you "on your toes" and rejuvenated because there's always something to learn or develop.
As to our lifelong health journey - you're a lot further out than I am, and I'm already starting to feel some of the "2nd year" struggles to maintain the focus. I'm trying to take the same tack of changing things up and kick-starting my routine to keep it "new" and interesting. Changing up the type of things I'm doing at the gym - kickboxing, more/different weights, interval fight training, will be doing yoga with Katie mornings during the summer, swimming, etc. Changing up the types of foods I'm cooking and when I'm cooking... and cooking with and for other people... all helps keep that enthusiasm in the process.
I guess I would just say - it's OK to not feel "burning passion" every day... it's normal. Sustaining a level that we'd call "passion" on a daily basis would be exhausting. But enjoyment and enthusiasm are key to energizing our lives, with occasional bursts of passion. And finding that ebb and flow is a lifelong process that requires experimentation and sometimes even scary leaps of faith.
Karen
P.S. - How'd I do, Eric? ;-)
Seriously, I'm going to go all "older sister" on you here. Being 47, married 22 years, and in my career for (omg) 26 years, I have a slightly different perspective now than I did when I was in your shoes. I think our personalities are very similar - we certainly seem to think alike in a ton of ways. I find it really hard to sustain the level that I'd describe as "passionate" about things for an extended period of time. That used to bother me and make me feel like I was doing something wrong or missing something critical in me or in my life.
Think about the typical relationship - you meet the person and sparks fly. You can't WAIT to spend every second with the person (to the exclusion of pretty much everything else) and your world revolves around interacting with them and making them happy (and hopefully, their world does the same thing). Over time, the newness wears off and you settle into a more balanced and comfortable life where your heart still skips a beat when they call, but you can concentrate on your work day and enjoy a night out with the girls without your partner. You both get on with your lives - pointing in the same direction, lookout outward together AS partners, instead of focusing inward at each other. Periodically, you each do something positive to "shake it up" (a romantic weekend, flowers for no reason, a "hot date night", etc.) That combination of things is what sustains the relationship over time.
Life AND career are a lot like that. It's OK to not feel passionate about your job or your life routine every day. When you start feeling that lack of passion in a sustained way over time, though, you need to start looking at alternatives. You've been working ER exclusively for some time now in 2 different places. How do you recharge your nursing batteries? Would it be more rejuvenating to have 2 DIFFERENT types of nursing jobs? One on a surg floor and one in ER? One in a doc's office and one in ER? What is it that really turns you on in nursing... be specific... and look for a position that features that, but then find something that complements it. So if you thrive on the adrenaline rush of an emergency, which is why you love ER work, maybe look into riding an ambulance a couple of days a week or getting flight nurse training to supplement. If you love the interaction with patients, maybe a charge nurse position with the elderly would be a good supplement. Change it up in your life - and that's OK. It will help you sustain the passion for nursing.
I started out my career (as an English major with minors in comp sci and medieval languages) writing computer documentation... which morphed into programming systems to deliver documentation to remote printers using the internet (which wasn't even the internet at that point, it was DARPANET - yes, I'm dating myself)... which morphed into designing and creating online documentation... which morphed into internet-based training systems... which morphed into website design and programming... which morphed into .... you get the idea. There was a direct correlation between each of the morphings because I was following a passionate idea of something I was really enjoying in what I was doing at the moment, and developing that area until it led to something else. I've never been "bored" in my career (except once, leading up to Sept 11th, and that turned out to be the best morph of all) because I've allowed myself to continually redefined and explore. It can be scary to do that (especially because I've always been the primary breadwinner), but it keeps you "on your toes" and rejuvenated because there's always something to learn or develop.
As to our lifelong health journey - you're a lot further out than I am, and I'm already starting to feel some of the "2nd year" struggles to maintain the focus. I'm trying to take the same tack of changing things up and kick-starting my routine to keep it "new" and interesting. Changing up the type of things I'm doing at the gym - kickboxing, more/different weights, interval fight training, will be doing yoga with Katie mornings during the summer, swimming, etc. Changing up the types of foods I'm cooking and when I'm cooking... and cooking with and for other people... all helps keep that enthusiasm in the process.
I guess I would just say - it's OK to not feel "burning passion" every day... it's normal. Sustaining a level that we'd call "passion" on a daily basis would be exhausting. But enjoyment and enthusiasm are key to energizing our lives, with occasional bursts of passion. And finding that ebb and flow is a lifelong process that requires experimentation and sometimes even scary leaps of faith.
Karen
P.S. - How'd I do, Eric? ;-)
Holy Crap. That's really all I have to say because I'm so amazed by that post.
I will definately re read it and probably print it out for my own personal use, it's that powerful to me.
And yes, we do think a lot the same :)
And I've looked into ambulance stuff...need a specific cert for that and class starts in January so it'll be something I am definately pursuing.
Thanks so much :)
I will definately re read it and probably print it out for my own personal use, it's that powerful to me.
And yes, we do think a lot the same :)
And I've looked into ambulance stuff...need a specific cert for that and class starts in January so it'll be something I am definately pursuing.
Thanks so much :)
Instead of complaining that the rosebush has thorns, be happy that the thorn bush has roses.
R K.
on 5/12/10 6:24 am
on 5/12/10 6:24 am
Satisfaction, contentment, happiness, commitment. Replace the word passion with those words as a goal. Passion is fleeting and you can recreate it anytime you choose but IMHO it`s not a long term goal. It`s an occasional treat.
After 30+ years and over 3 1/2 million miles of trucking there is no passion for the job. I learned from a very wise Mennonite preacher that work (although we always give it 100%) isn`t our life, it`s what we do so we can have a life. I always feel bad for people who`s whole life and what defines them is their occupation. They are missing out on what`s really important.
Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony. ~
After 30+ years and over 3 1/2 million miles of trucking there is no passion for the job. I learned from a very wise Mennonite preacher that work (although we always give it 100%) isn`t our life, it`s what we do so we can have a life. I always feel bad for people who`s whole life and what defines them is their occupation. They are missing out on what`s really important.
Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony. ~
*
"If I only had three words of advice, they would be, Tell the Truth. If got three more words, I'd add, all the time."
— Randy Pausch
"If I only had three words of advice, they would be, Tell the Truth. If got three more words, I'd add, all the time."
— Randy Pausch
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