My dad just passed away
My dad just passed away unexpectedly and it's tearing me apart. I know death is a part of life but that doesnt help a broken heart. My question is I have always been an emotional eater, I ate out of boredom, stress, anxiety and any kind of change in my life I turned to food. How do I control this now with the surgery and pain of losing my dad?
I am so sorry to hear of the loss of your father *hugs*.
Emotional eating gets the best of the best of us! The key is to be prepared. Have healthy snacks surrounding you. I am sure that you are going to be a busy lady the next week or so. Always have protein bars, cheese sticks, frui****er, etc handy so if you are out longer then planned you have healthy options. Also recognizing the emotional eating is the first step. Now that you know you do it you can keep yourself from doing it. And in all reality I am sure that your eating isn't going to be perfect the next few days / week - don't be too hard on yourself. Just do your best.
We are here no matter what you need. You can call/text me anytime too 610-462-1204. Sometimes just talking to someone else (be it one of us, your spouse/significant other, friend) can distract you enough that you forget about the food.
ANother tip - if you feel yourself going for food - have a cup of tea or a glass of water instead.
*big hugs*
Liz
Emotional eating gets the best of the best of us! The key is to be prepared. Have healthy snacks surrounding you. I am sure that you are going to be a busy lady the next week or so. Always have protein bars, cheese sticks, frui****er, etc handy so if you are out longer then planned you have healthy options. Also recognizing the emotional eating is the first step. Now that you know you do it you can keep yourself from doing it. And in all reality I am sure that your eating isn't going to be perfect the next few days / week - don't be too hard on yourself. Just do your best.
We are here no matter what you need. You can call/text me anytime too 610-462-1204. Sometimes just talking to someone else (be it one of us, your spouse/significant other, friend) can distract you enough that you forget about the food.
ANother tip - if you feel yourself going for food - have a cup of tea or a glass of water instead.
*big hugs*
Liz
I'm so sorry to hear about your loss. When it's unexpected, it seems it's even harder to comprehend and you go through your days in a numb, disbelieving "daze" for a while. It's kind of like having a tender spot on a tooth that you try to stay away from, but can't help poking every once in a while. I, too, lost my dad suddenly, so I understand what you're feeling.
In the days that come, people will be pushing food on you - it's society's way of providing comfort. i can't even recall how many people brought casseroles and lasagnas in the days following my dad's death. Given your recent surgery, that will all be VERY tempting for you, especially as an emotional eater.
You've taken a huge step to recognize that and in having the surgery. Let the tool work for you now. It will help you "limit the damage" in the days ahead. Be kind to yourself, focus on your emotional needs and on letting yourself truly feel the devastation of your grief. Don't try to numb it by diving into a casserole. It will actually help you heal better emotionally if you let yourself feel it.
Think about how proud your dad must have been of your progress so far (you've been doing just great!) and how you want to honor his memory by not allowing this to get you off track. Keep healthy foods handy (not to graze, but to ensure that you can make good choices when it's time to eat). Keep your water bottle at your side at all times. Keep journaling your food... and try journaling your emotions along with it, which might help too.
Don't be afraid to ask people who are bringing food to place it directly into your freezer, or to place it somewhere that others can help themselves but it will be out of your line of sight. Likewise, enlist helpers to do the serving and cleanup, so you're not facing that "last slice" of something tempting at a weak moment.
And, as Liz said, call one of us if you need to talk. My cell is 267-261-1582 and you're more than welcome to use it.
Yes, it's a tough time, but you CAN and you WILL get through it. Remember to be as kind to yourself as you are to others.
big hugs.
Karen
In the days that come, people will be pushing food on you - it's society's way of providing comfort. i can't even recall how many people brought casseroles and lasagnas in the days following my dad's death. Given your recent surgery, that will all be VERY tempting for you, especially as an emotional eater.
You've taken a huge step to recognize that and in having the surgery. Let the tool work for you now. It will help you "limit the damage" in the days ahead. Be kind to yourself, focus on your emotional needs and on letting yourself truly feel the devastation of your grief. Don't try to numb it by diving into a casserole. It will actually help you heal better emotionally if you let yourself feel it.
Think about how proud your dad must have been of your progress so far (you've been doing just great!) and how you want to honor his memory by not allowing this to get you off track. Keep healthy foods handy (not to graze, but to ensure that you can make good choices when it's time to eat). Keep your water bottle at your side at all times. Keep journaling your food... and try journaling your emotions along with it, which might help too.
Don't be afraid to ask people who are bringing food to place it directly into your freezer, or to place it somewhere that others can help themselves but it will be out of your line of sight. Likewise, enlist helpers to do the serving and cleanup, so you're not facing that "last slice" of something tempting at a weak moment.
And, as Liz said, call one of us if you need to talk. My cell is 267-261-1582 and you're more than welcome to use it.
Yes, it's a tough time, but you CAN and you WILL get through it. Remember to be as kind to yourself as you are to others.
big hugs.
Karen
I am so sorry for your loss and the emotional pain you are experiencing as a result of that.
That being said, the fact that you know you are an emotional eater is a good thing, because as others have said, you can prepare yourself to do things without indulging your old lifestyle habit. Try to remember that while the physical part of your Dad is no longer present, his love and spirit for you remain and he would not want you to feel badly and that spirit will be wanting you to continue on your road to healthy living.
I lost my only parent almost 9 years ago, it was a very sad time and I speak from experience when I say that you will have moments of knowing your Dad's spirit is with you, I wish you peace in this most difficult of life's moments and joy in the memories you have of your Dad.
Hugs, Laureen
That being said, the fact that you know you are an emotional eater is a good thing, because as others have said, you can prepare yourself to do things without indulging your old lifestyle habit. Try to remember that while the physical part of your Dad is no longer present, his love and spirit for you remain and he would not want you to feel badly and that spirit will be wanting you to continue on your road to healthy living.
I lost my only parent almost 9 years ago, it was a very sad time and I speak from experience when I say that you will have moments of knowing your Dad's spirit is with you, I wish you peace in this most difficult of life's moments and joy in the memories you have of your Dad.
Hugs, Laureen
My Mantra is that I do not determine my success by the number hanging in my closet, nor will I let the scale determine that success either. . . It is through trial and error I will continue to grow and succeed. . . Laureen
"Success is a journey, not a destination." Ben Sweetland
I am so sorry to hear about your loss. I can't even imagine your pain but I am sure your father is in a better place. As for the emotional eating please turn to us at this stressful time in your life. Support is the key to keeping you on track. Remember you are stronger than those demons that want to make you eat. Lots of cyberhugs coming your way. You and your family will be in my prayers. Take care of yourself.
-Shilpa
People comment on my over 100 pound weight loss and attribute it to my WILLpower, but it is my WANTpower: I WANT to be thin and healthy more than anything else!
My sincere condolences on the loss of your dad - many prayers coming your way and whether it's expected or not it always seems to be a shock.
I just lost my mom a little over 2 weeks ago and while we knew she had a terminal illness she had not been classified as 'terminally ill' - if that makes sense. I will just tell you now that I have no idea what I ate, how I ate or even cared about it. All I know was when I started feeling woozy or just plain crappy I would realize I hadn't eaten and grab anything I knew my pouch would tolerate.
Don't get me wrong - I am not recommending that type of eating, but at this time its going to be very difficult to stay on track and even think about it - many people brought food - mostly deli trays, potato and macc salads, big rolls, desserts and snacks. I stuck to meat & cheese roll-ups when I ate - had some of the salads but not much. One precious person did bring me a huge jar of homemade applesauce that was made with Splenda so I ate a lot of that. And one day I made a crockpot of chili with lots of beans and meat for protein.
I'm just now getting back to good eating - my body was telling me it was time - my hair has gotten dull and is breaking so I know my protein levels were way down. When you're dealing with the loss of someone like this the last thing you really think of is yourself.
Right now you're going to be dealing with so much - if you can keep protein bars handy - remember to stay hydrated and don't berate yourself if you fall off track during this stressful time - you will get back once life calms down.
Again, my thoughts and prayers are with you...take care, Kathy
I just lost my mom a little over 2 weeks ago and while we knew she had a terminal illness she had not been classified as 'terminally ill' - if that makes sense. I will just tell you now that I have no idea what I ate, how I ate or even cared about it. All I know was when I started feeling woozy or just plain crappy I would realize I hadn't eaten and grab anything I knew my pouch would tolerate.
Don't get me wrong - I am not recommending that type of eating, but at this time its going to be very difficult to stay on track and even think about it - many people brought food - mostly deli trays, potato and macc salads, big rolls, desserts and snacks. I stuck to meat & cheese roll-ups when I ate - had some of the salads but not much. One precious person did bring me a huge jar of homemade applesauce that was made with Splenda so I ate a lot of that. And one day I made a crockpot of chili with lots of beans and meat for protein.
I'm just now getting back to good eating - my body was telling me it was time - my hair has gotten dull and is breaking so I know my protein levels were way down. When you're dealing with the loss of someone like this the last thing you really think of is yourself.
Right now you're going to be dealing with so much - if you can keep protein bars handy - remember to stay hydrated and don't berate yourself if you fall off track during this stressful time - you will get back once life calms down.
Again, my thoughts and prayers are with you...take care, Kathy
'One shoe can change your life'...Cinderella
Please accept my deepest and heartfelt sympathy in the loss of your dad. Losing my parents was so difficult for me because we were so close. I think about them every day and still miss them a great deal. I think of the words my mom used to say to me "everyone has to make this journey." She didn't want me to be sad. I remember all of the fun times we had and the precious memories.
Recognizing that you are an emotional eater is huge. I know it will be difficult for you, but try to plan and have available to you things that are healthy and good for you. If you remember to eat your snacks and prepare as best you possibly can, you will get through this. It will make you a much stronger person.
I'm sure your dad was very proud of your success. He would want you to eat healthy and not deviate from your plan. Remember, his spirit will always be with you. Please know you are in my thoughts and prayers.
God Bless,
Debbie
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