Recommittment

So I've said for the past few weeks that I've had some weight gain and what I have been attributing it to.  But I was attributing less of it to what it should be and more of it to what it shouldn't be.

I gain 5-8 pounds every month during my cycle.  Seriously.  Nothing I can do about that.  However, it is gone in 2-3 days MAXIMUM

My lowest weight was 128.  Definately didn't like it there.  I then jumped up to about 133 without changing anything.  And for quite the time I hung between 130-135

Lately I've been hanging around 135-140.  No big deal, right?  Frigging wrong.  I'm done with it.

My clothes are snug.  Granted, they still fit, but not well.  And when I DID gain the 5 pounds in frigging water weight, seriously - I had almost nothing to wear.  Because 5 pounds on top of already snug pants...not a pretty picture, nor a comfortable one.

So...the past 2 days I've done a lot of thinking.  Here's been my mistakes:

~ Eating out of boredom.  With the exception of 2 nights I had 8 days off from work.  I was home, in the snow, with nothing better to do.

~ Eating on the go.  Not pre planning ANYTHING while home

~ Testing my limits.  I can have sugar in certain amounts without dumping.  When it snowed..I baked "for Brian".  Frig that.  It wasn't JUST for Brian.  It was for me.  Mom and I used to bake all the time when it snowed...and it's the first thing I did.  Did I have mallitol on hand?  Yup.  Did I use it?  Nope.  why?  Because Brian won't eat malitol, so I used that as my excuse.  Yes, it's a damn excuse.  I made two batches (6 each) of cinnamon rolls.  I can guarantee you I ate at least a total of 2 of them over the course of "a little piece here" and "a little piece there"

~Exercise - non existent

So....game plan:

I went back to pre packaging my meals today, my fridge has a bunch of containers

I am writing down what I eat (IE the menu thread)

I am NOT testing my sugar limits.  Before I made this committment, much earlier today, Brian went to McDonalds and got me a vanilla shake.  I get insanely ill off those things, even a sip or two.  Guess who got insanely ill today?  That was the last straw for me.  Going back to no more than 5gm of added sugar, etc

Gym starts on Sunday.  Ok...why not today....the fact of the matter is I will NOT go to the gym when I am doing three nights in a row.  I am out of the house for 14 hours as it is, plus waking up time and going to bed time...I'm lucky to get 6 hours of sleep on a work night as it is, and that is the bare minimum I need to function safely in my job.  So, I will go on Sunday morning after work.

I am printing out the gym schedule and packing a gym bag in the meantime to keep in the car with me at all times so there's no excuse after work.

I may start journaling...I've never been a big journaler...but lately with all the family stress...I think it might be worth a try.

No more excuses.  Back to how hard core I used to be.

Any support, kicks in the ass, or snarky comments are more than welcome!

no snarky comments from me.. I am right here with you on the recommittment. 

After my appointment yesterday, I was so frustrated.  I already had a pork roast in the crock pot, so I came to sparkpeople and figured out portion sizes/calories.  I measured out 3 oz. servings and put in containers in the fridge.  I made sure Siehara and I each had a 3oz serving for dinner, too. I made some veggies in the pot with it, so I portioned them out in each container, as well.  

Then, after dinner, I made some chicken thighs that turned out to be 3oz..put one of each into a container, along with some leftover veggies that were in the fridge from the other night.  Each is portioned as a complete meal.

Today, I will be making chili in the crockpot and doing the same thing.  I will use my 1C containers and portioning out. 

So, now I will have pork, chicken and chili in the freezer so I can just grab, heat and eat! 

When I go shopping today, I am going to pick up some more dense protein so I can make more stuff.  
I don't need to recommit to exercise as I hadn't stopped, but I DO need to recommit to the 5K training.  I started at week 1 day 1 yesterday and it was tough, but I will do it!!!!!

I am going to try really hard to follow the pouch for dummies things from Jackie's post.  It makes a whole lot of sense!

Frustrated is the EXACT word - although the more I thought about it the more angry I became at the whole thing....my whole "mental ignorance" as I coined it

GREAT job on all the pre packaging.  All I did was for the next couple of nights at work - but that's all I really needed.

Sunday I'll be cooking a bunch of things and pre pack for the rest of the week

And kudos to you for working from home - because these 8 days proved to me that regardless of my tool, I'm not sure how successful I would be from being at home all day.  Obviously NOT my strong suit.

I know that's a big part of my problem.  I have way too much access to all this food. 

The day I went into the office was great.  I packed everything and only ate what I packed.  The only thing I bought while I was there was 1 cup of coffee.

I wish you every success, Pam.  You definitely seem to know what you must do and are prepared to do it.  And you can!!

And I will take a cue from you in the planning-ahead dept...Yes, the "hard core" seems to be the best way to go, doesn't it?  I wonder if that's part of that "all or nothing" thing - when I don't kick my own ass, I fall apart.  Moderation was never my thing...

Consider your ass kicked, girlie - and then I'll bend over so you can kick mine!! I swear I don't know if its the weather, life in general or what but I have been off my program of eating well and exercising too. Hell the owner of my Curves even called me the other day wondering where I've been and asked me to stop in just to talk and try to get started back!! How sad is that?

I did grab an orange (along with my daily banana) for today - I am definitely not getting enough fruits or veggies in my diet, and doing too much evening snacking.

Yesterday I actually started logging my food again - not that it was GOOD food, but at least I logged it. Maybe that'll be my wake-up call - I know I've put a few pounds back on as well - can tell in my clothes. And I am not making the same mistake again of thinking 'well gee, if I only go up one size it won't matter' - did that once before and ended up running out of sizes!

I am so looking forward to the weekend when I can get out and walk the dog again - I haven't had a walk all week due to heading to the hospital after work every night to visit mom - by the time I get home and try to nuke something for dinner, change, play with the dog and clean up the kitchen I'm exhausted - mentally and physically - oh yeah, let's not forget the phone calls at night to the sibs to update them on mom...it is very draining. But it is NOT an excuse - well, at least not a GOOD one for the bad habits I'm forming again.

So let's kick some butt, girl!! Get back on that wagon and at least get some exercise in and better food. I printed out Jackie's article on the Pouch Rules for Dummies and am sticking it in my Barix bible to take home for some 'light' reading this weekend!

Good luck to all of us!!

I have a snarky comment but I have to e-mail it

There is a house across the street from me - you should buy it so we can force each other to exercise!

I am SO going to have to re-commit after the baby comes. Now I have to eat carbs.  I too have been pushing the sugar limits, I know I can eat 10 grams without feeling ill, so what did I do, last night  I had 14 - I was still OK but it scared me! I know a lot of it is hormonal and things will go back to "normal" later.

I will join you in the re-commitment, I need to make sure to pack all my food every day. I need to have things accessible at to grab and go, that's the only thing that works for me. I can't exercise right now, but hope that I can get cleared for something on 3/2 when I see the Dr again.

Ironically I do better when I am at home, infact I find I don't eat ENOUGH when I am at home all day! My work days are so structured that I live by the clock when I am here, not so much at home.

*hugs* if you need anything you know where to get me!

I got your comment :)

Hey - I want in on the comment! :)

Pam - this is a great post.  It's too easy to slip into bad habits.  I do SO much better during the week at work than I do when I am home.  And the gym is a really good idea too.  That is one thing that I have committed to and while I can't say that I enjoy it, I can say that I feel really good after I've done it.

Lisa