rough days
Hi Karen,
Wow, your head may not be where you are emotionally right now, but I applaud your honesty and the fact that you are working through it in such a fine manner.
I also want to say that I, too, have been in a bit of a funk the last few days, part of it is that I have not been to the gym in the last few weeks, due to the fact that I want to spend all my free time with Dillinger. I am feeling guilty and even while most days I make all the right food choices, I had hoped to make my personal goal by my 2nd anniversary, however, the scale does not move in a downward direction these days, matter of fact I've actually gained a few pounds, so while I am happy to have my dear boy with me, I also need to motivate myself to do some stuff at home, I just never did any home exercise before and while I know what to do when I get to the gym, I don't know where to begin at home. . . anyway, just want to say, I'm here for you and you have down a marvelous job, I've seen you at Barix and you look incredible. Hope your feelings pass, as well as your current goal being achieved in short order.
Hugs, Laureen
Wow, your head may not be where you are emotionally right now, but I applaud your honesty and the fact that you are working through it in such a fine manner.
I also want to say that I, too, have been in a bit of a funk the last few days, part of it is that I have not been to the gym in the last few weeks, due to the fact that I want to spend all my free time with Dillinger. I am feeling guilty and even while most days I make all the right food choices, I had hoped to make my personal goal by my 2nd anniversary, however, the scale does not move in a downward direction these days, matter of fact I've actually gained a few pounds, so while I am happy to have my dear boy with me, I also need to motivate myself to do some stuff at home, I just never did any home exercise before and while I know what to do when I get to the gym, I don't know where to begin at home. . . anyway, just want to say, I'm here for you and you have down a marvelous job, I've seen you at Barix and you look incredible. Hope your feelings pass, as well as your current goal being achieved in short order.
Hugs, Laureen
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My Mantra is that I do not determine my success by the number hanging in my closet, nor will I let the scale determine that success either. . . It is through trial and error I will continue to grow and succeed. . . Laureen
"Success is a journey, not a destination." Ben Sweetland
Laureen,
Thank you so much for the encouraging words. I am trying very hard as part of my program to be unflinchingly honest with myself and with my support resources. In the past, one of the symptoms of the food addiction was hiding things - hidden eating, hidden calories, hidden binging... seeming so 'together' publicly while having this massive-feeling dysfunction privately.
So far, the policy of honesty seems to be helping me deal with the recovery portion of this. So thank you for recognizing that.
Given how many of us are in funks, I think we need a "funky" group - haha! Maybe I'll try to find some funk-themed music to bring to the meeting tomorrow night ;-). Let's see - the Funkadelics, Grand Funk Railroad... I'm sure we can come up with some more.
Thanks again!
Karen
Thank you so much for the encouraging words. I am trying very hard as part of my program to be unflinchingly honest with myself and with my support resources. In the past, one of the symptoms of the food addiction was hiding things - hidden eating, hidden calories, hidden binging... seeming so 'together' publicly while having this massive-feeling dysfunction privately.
So far, the policy of honesty seems to be helping me deal with the recovery portion of this. So thank you for recognizing that.
Given how many of us are in funks, I think we need a "funky" group - haha! Maybe I'll try to find some funk-themed music to bring to the meeting tomorrow night ;-). Let's see - the Funkadelics, Grand Funk Railroad... I'm sure we can come up with some more.
Thanks again!
Karen
Hi Karen,
You are dealing with a ton of life stuff that is somewhat challenging and can be painful. Allow yourself to cry, and mourn with your friend. It's okay to feel bad about the end of summer, I sure do. Life sometimes hurts and it's good that you are identifying the different painful parts that are hitting you right now.
See if you can spend some time to yourself, a walk in a park, or a quiet time with just candlelight and just meditate. You need some R&R.
Hugs,
Trish
You are dealing with a ton of life stuff that is somewhat challenging and can be painful. Allow yourself to cry, and mourn with your friend. It's okay to feel bad about the end of summer, I sure do. Life sometimes hurts and it's good that you are identifying the different painful parts that are hitting you right now.
See if you can spend some time to yourself, a walk in a park, or a quiet time with just candlelight and just meditate. You need some R&R.
Hugs,
Trish
Seek always to do some good, somewhere. Every man has to seek in his own way to realize his true worth. You must give some time to your fellow man. For remember, you don't live in a world all your own. Your brothers are here too.
Albert Schweitzer
Albert Schweitzer
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Trish -
I think you're right that some alone time (and down time) would help recharge the batteries. Actually working out tonight seems to have helped, too - the time on the treadmill, facing out the window and immersed in my music was very relaxing and calming.
Thanks so much for your support.
karen
I think you're right that some alone time (and down time) would help recharge the batteries. Actually working out tonight seems to have helped, too - the time on the treadmill, facing out the window and immersed in my music was very relaxing and calming.
Thanks so much for your support.
karen
I Didn't get to read everyone's replies but I am sure that you got some great ones!
One thing that does happen for us lucky women is that as we loose the fat estrogen is released back into our blood streams making our hormones and emotions go all sorts of whacky! You are doing great but have a lot of outside factors that are hitting you at once.In the past these emotions would have been comforted with food - now we have to deal with them head on - yikes!
We are here no matter what you need!
*hugs*
Liz
One thing that does happen for us lucky women is that as we loose the fat estrogen is released back into our blood streams making our hormones and emotions go all sorts of whacky! You are doing great but have a lot of outside factors that are hitting you at once.In the past these emotions would have been comforted with food - now we have to deal with them head on - yikes!
We are here no matter what you need!
*hugs*
Liz
Karen,
You are describing EXACTLY how I have been feeling the last couple of weeks. My emotions have been up and down with little or no warning. Unfortunately, my family has gotten the brunt of it. Then I feel worse, have to apologize especially to my six year old. Some days I feel great about what I have accomplished in such a short time. Then there are other days when I feel like I am not doing enough. My poor husband compliments me pretty much everyday and I still have difficulty acknowledging my success.
This head stuff is messed up!!
Give yourself a break...you deserve it!!
Beth
You are describing EXACTLY how I have been feeling the last couple of weeks. My emotions have been up and down with little or no warning. Unfortunately, my family has gotten the brunt of it. Then I feel worse, have to apologize especially to my six year old. Some days I feel great about what I have accomplished in such a short time. Then there are other days when I feel like I am not doing enough. My poor husband compliments me pretty much everyday and I still have difficulty acknowledging my success.
This head stuff is messed up!!
Give yourself a break...you deserve it!!
Beth
I"m not sure many of us "like" the mental part of this journey - and you continue to impress me with exactly how far you HAVE come in the mental department of this lesson in so little time.
Venting does help...and sometimes, it just takes time...which plain ol' sucks.
Don't beat yourself up over the 2 sf cookies you had. Granted, getting them out of the house might be an idea if you really feel it is what you need done...however - give yourself credit for having the two of them. I'm sure there were times in your life it wouldn't have been just 2 cookies, let alone sugar free cookies.
We don't need to be perfect at this - we need to keep successing and keep learning.
Hugs!
Pam
Venting does help...and sometimes, it just takes time...which plain ol' sucks.
Don't beat yourself up over the 2 sf cookies you had. Granted, getting them out of the house might be an idea if you really feel it is what you need done...however - give yourself credit for having the two of them. I'm sure there were times in your life it wouldn't have been just 2 cookies, let alone sugar free cookies.
We don't need to be perfect at this - we need to keep successing and keep learning.
Hugs!
Pam
Instead of complaining that the rosebush has thorns, be happy that the thorn bush has roses. 
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Thanks, Pam... and you're very right - there were times that it would have been the whole bag of cookies and they wouldn't have been sugar-free!
I've had some sugar-free cookies before (post-surg)... the difference is that those were planned treats and this one had the hallmarks of being "out of control" - I was eating for the completely wrong reasons. I was lucky that I did limit it to 2 of them, and I dutifully logged them (logging does help me, still). But I didn't like the mental state that I was in and how I felt about eating them. It felt too much like "the old days."
Anyway, I'm just trying to be patient with myself, do the right things, and keep moving. And to keep in mind that this is all just part of the journey, and it, too, shall pass. I hope.
I always appreciate your support!
Karen
I've had some sugar-free cookies before (post-surg)... the difference is that those were planned treats and this one had the hallmarks of being "out of control" - I was eating for the completely wrong reasons. I was lucky that I did limit it to 2 of them, and I dutifully logged them (logging does help me, still). But I didn't like the mental state that I was in and how I felt about eating them. It felt too much like "the old days."
Anyway, I'm just trying to be patient with myself, do the right things, and keep moving. And to keep in mind that this is all just part of the journey, and it, too, shall pass. I hope.
I always appreciate your support!
Karen