Negativity from strangers.

So, boyfriend and I stop into the mall tonight. He decides to go to the eyeglass store to check out some frames he saw in the window. Right next door is a GNC, so I run in and see about getting some samples of protein shakes to try.

When I walk into the store this middle-aged woman asks me if I need help. I tell her I am looking for protein shakes and she promptly gives me a strange look. I expected it. What fat girl goes into GNC looking for protein. Anyway, I tell her that I'm going to be having WLS and then she's ready to help me. She gets me some samples of chocolate and vanilla and some other thing. While she's ringing me out some muscle-head is sitting in the massage chair while they process a return for him.

"What do you have there?" he asks.
I politely answer, "Protein shakes." and clearly look like I don't want to explain.

The lady that was waiting on me feels that it is her duty to announce that I am having WLS.

*disclaimer* I am not ashamed that I am having this surgery at all. I'm actually very proud and excited to be making this extrordinary change in my life. It's just not GNC lady's place to tell random strangers my business.

Seems that this "dude" is a personal trainer and starts telling me how he can make me drop 30lbs in 2 months and how he's talked people out of the surgery. And then how his GF has it before he met her and she regrets it. BLAH, BLAH, BLAH. I've did the trainer thing for 2 years. It's not a matter of training anymore. I having this surgery because of a medical condition that TRAINING can't fix. He just wouldn't lay off.

GNC lady did finally come to my rescue and tell him that he doesn't know my medical history and then he stopped.

I grabbed my bag and met BF outside of the store. He could tell I was clearly upset. He shared a piece, just a piece, of his Auntie Ann's pretzel with me and he hugged me while I vented to him. He's a good guy. :)

This is the first pushback that I've received from anyone regarding this surgery. I've had people "awe, you don't need that, you look fine" but that doesn't bother me. I'm really not doing this for looks, although it will be a nice perk! It's entirely for health reasons and so I can have a family someday.

I just didn't think some stranger talking crap on my decision would effect me as much as it did. Oh well, some people...

I am so sorry you went through this.  People always feel they can put their two cents in no matter the subject.  Like when a woman is pregnant.  Total strangers will touch her belly.

You have made the decision that is correct for you.  Some will understand it.  Some won't.  Some will keep their oppinions to themselves and others wont.  You have to take it with a grain of salt.

People told me before the surgery I wasnt fat enough.  My response was.... You've never seen me naked.  Now people tell me after losing 65lbs I need to stop.  Well I'm 190lbs and obviously I need to lose at least 40lb more.  When I tell them that they say.. OMG from where can you lose it?  My response again is..... You havent seen me naked. (Nor would they want to at this stage of weight loss..gravity and sagging skin...snort)  If I show them a pic of me at my highest weight before surgery they say.. OMG I can't remember you being that BIG!.  Make up your mind people! HEH.

There are many wonderful people on this board that have gone through the same thing as you.  They will support you.  Come and lean on us when you need that support.

Diane

I totally agree with Diane...people have told me also that they didn't think I was big enough to have the WLS either...but my reason was also for my health...since my surgery I have gone from using 2 kinds of insulin and 2 pills for diabetes to 1/2 pill for my diabetes (which by the way my endocrinologist said I might not even need that after May or so), I am not taking all 3 of my blood pressure medicines, and I am not taking all 3 cholesterol meds anymore either!  WLS was my saving grace.  People also say to me now not to lose anymore weight.  I simply respond that I will continue to lose what my body is willing to lose, and leave it at that.  Sometimes you just have to have a thick skin and brush these negative comments off your shoulder...it is hard to do sometimes, but others can't dictate what is best for you in your life....keep strong and keep venting to us...we are great listeners!

Dee

It's amazing what people believe they have the right to say to (or about) people.  The GNC lady was the first at fault - she had no business sharing.  And actually had no business looking at you quizzicly about the protein powder as well.

And the muscle head - well - he's just a muscle head.

Your BF sounds like an awesome guy - much like my husband.  Just a few weeks ago I was having a conversation with a stranger about my decision (long story here...) and the weight loss and everything and they started giving me crap.  I was holding my own in the conversation and my husband, when it had gone on to long, put his arm around me and said "I'm sorry to interrupt but I do have to say one thing.  There is one really excellent thing here.  And that is that your opinion is not our problem"

I loved loved LOVED that answer.  Brian wants a t shirt made up with that saying "Your opinion is not my problem" 

Enjoy the protein!

Pam

we could arrange that....

Haha... When your hubby makes those t-shirts, I want one!
 

God people are idiots!

I don't understand how a perfect stranger feels it's any of thier business to tell you crap. they don't know you. I don't have any advice other than to ignore complete idiots. You know why you are doing this. You know what is best for you. And stick to your guns!

I'm so sorry you had such a negative experience, especially in a public place. Like you I'm very open about my WLS and last year on a flight to Seattle I sat next to a young man who was a personal trainer. Somehow we got around to weight, etc., and I told him I had had RNY, showed him my before picture and he was amazed and very supportive - he even gave me his card and said to look him up when I was ready to kick my work-outs up a notch.He thought it was a wonderful tool for me.

So they're not all d*ckweeds - you just happened to run into one...I hope future experiences with strangers are much better - ignorance is not knowing and opening your mouth like you do. Just ignore those people because they do not want to be educated or understand.

Kathy

Thanks everyone for making me realize that "dude" was just a tool. I really think that all he saw were $$... he just wanted to make money off of me. Too bad he doesn't know that I'm pretty much broke! lol

I'm glad I have the support system that I do. Between this site and my friends and family who support me 100%, I really don't need to care what anyone else thinks.

Thanks for being there and thanks for letting me vent! Yenz are all pretty awesome.

wow people can be so tacky!  I would have gotten her name and reported her butt to headquarters for violating my privacy which she had no right or need to explaine anything for you.  If you wanted this "dude" to know your business you were perfectly capable of doing so. And GNC "lady" if she didn't open her big mouth wouldn't have had to "rescue" you so she stuck her foot in her mouth.  I love Pam's husband Brian's comeback and it's so perfect!  Yay Brian! I personally do not volunteer info on my surgery unless someone is considering it and do  not care what their opinions are. Negative or positive. I do not have to justify or explain my choices  Thats why they are my choices. And muscle head is a nosey jerk so he can take a long walk off a short pier. He had nerve asking you that. I would have just ignored him. And what does GNC think people who buy protein do with it? Dude needs to mind his own business no pun intended.