Something is just off kilter....

I don't really know what's the matter, but something is keeping me from my peace. It would be easier if I could identify what it is, but I can't. Something is bugging me enough to make me have a glass of wine or a beer every day. I am making sure that I still lose weight, but I really don't want to be doing this this way. I want to be stronger. I dunno, maybe it is the fast weight loss, the big changes, the new job, the kids, school, I just don't know. But I feel like I'm sometimes just at the precipice of unraveling.

OMG OMG OMG.  I have been trying to communicate/articulate this for twod days.  Agitated, discontented.  Can't seem to "soothe" myself in anyway.  Want to drink.  Want to eat.  I'm not doing either but it's so FRUSTRATING.  I get angry and irritable from it too.  And the unraveling feeling too!!!  Is it the full moon?  Time of year?  I can't believe someone else is feeling this way.  This horrible.  I'm so sorry you are!  But glad that I am not going insane, which is what I was beginning to think.  Nothing makes me content, happy or gives me peace.  I know I have to get that from inside but my usual ways of getting it AREN'T WORKING AT ALLLLLLLL!!!!!!  What are we going to do Cheryl????

Cheryl:
I chalk this up to hormones.  That seems to work for everything.  I hope you start to feel better soon.  Maybe you should just scream or try to get away from everything for a short period of time just to be with Cheryl and spend quality time with yourself.  Good luck!!!!
Linda

There's TONS of reasons you can be feeling that way - all of them valid. Could you perhaps speak to a therapist? You may find that to be helpful.

But I can promise you that you're going to find it increasingly difficult to keep yourself to that "one" daily drink.

That's a habit you need to break right now!

As much as this is a touchy subject on this board I have to agree - that daily drink is something you may need to watch out for and may want to cut that out immediately.  There was a point in our lives where we would have one cookie, too.

As far as not feeling at peace...there's a lot of changes now.  Perhaps you could start journaling.  I am not a big fan of journaling but have done it at times and have realized after a few days of writing down nothing things seem to just pour out of me and I get to the bottom of whatever it is that is bugging me.  (That's generally when I stop journaling, too.....because I feel better)

Good luck and feel better!

Pam

Oh Pam I am the opposite I have had my online journal since 2001 and before that hand written journals I love to write or brain dump daily as I put it....but glad you do when you need to!

Cheryl,

     I was going to say having a ****tail to unwind is not a problem but having it because you are feeling something is bothering you and it is helping you at night is not a good thing, There maybe many reasons so meting is tugging at your emotions but only you can figure that out maybe talk a therapist or like Pam suggested journal to let out your emotions. If you need to call a Friend say I just need to talk and vent it out to see if you can figure it out.

  I saw you last night and sadly didn't get a chance to introduce myself to you I promise I will make a point of it next time.

I know I have to get it together. I'm depressed, tired, lonely. It just doesn't go away with the weight, does it?

I am finding (and I'm no where near as far along as you are) that it actually is worse with out the weight.  Which from an intellectual standpoint makes total sense to me because the "medication" I was using is gone so whatever is in there is bubbling up.  Intellectual understanding and liking it are two very different things though.  In addition to knowing what to do with it.  I feel like these huge sewer holes down by the river where I live.  When it rains a lot they are rushing and flowing water like crazy into the river.  Other times nothing coming out.  When it's rushing and going crazy it feels so difficult to figure out what "it" is, I mean come on, it's water and it's flowing, separating it out is impossible.  I think I might go for a massage, a non-head way to process whatever is happening.  I'm sure this made no sense and sounded like a rambling idiot on crack but it makes sense to me.  I'm sending prayers, vibes, hope and good energy your way in the hopes that something gives for you soon.

Keri