pot calling the kettle black?
A few days ago, I saw some fat guy devouring a doughnut. he wasn't eating it. He inhaled it. I watch, in horror, at a red light. I am sure that is how I was and realized that is how I got to where I was. I lost a bet w/ a friend. I thought I could eat 1 dozen doughnuts, but I had to quit at 11 and 1/2. Was sick all day...but you do stupid things when you are 18.
But is it hypocritical to feel that way when I see someone fat doing something bad? when I see a really big guy, I want to stop them and talk to the about WLS. I don't, but the thought crosses my mind.
What are your thoughts?
But is it hypocritical to feel that way when I see someone fat doing something bad? when I see a really big guy, I want to stop them and talk to the about WLS. I don't, but the thought crosses my mind.
What are your thoughts?
I feel the same way sometimes, but I also know that if someone had stopped and talked to me before I was "ready" that I wouldn't have listened to a word they said. I concentrate on the people who know me and who have seen my results of WLS. I have had my eye on a few people and all I can do is share with them.
I don't think it is hypocritical but we know how much better we feel and we want others to know that feeling. My 3 closest coworkers are obese and I know at least one of them NEEDS to have WLS surgery to get the pounds off. I just keep encouraging her to make the right choices and hopefully she will see what she needs to do.
Sorry for being long winded...have a great day.
Katie
I don't think it is hypocritical but we know how much better we feel and we want others to know that feeling. My 3 closest coworkers are obese and I know at least one of them NEEDS to have WLS surgery to get the pounds off. I just keep encouraging her to make the right choices and hopefully she will see what she needs to do.
Sorry for being long winded...have a great day.
Katie
Progress not perfection
It's not hypocritical as long as you realize you were that person at one point in time - which is something you already mentioned.
There are lots and lots of times I want to "help" people - but really - they wouldn't listen and would probably take offense to it. Andy once said at a meeting he would just love to go up to some people and say "I can save you" and yet you can't just go and do that.
If it fits into the conversation - I will mention it. Like if somebody says to me "I don't know how you do so much in your life I get tired just thinking about it" I tell them that I didn't used to be this productive, or, if I was forced to do so, would be achey and tired and sore for a long time afterward. I tell them I could not do what I do without losing over a hundred pounds through a new dedication to a healthy life style and with the help of my gastric bypass tool. Now, granted...most times it's not to strangers....but there have been a few.
I am also put in a different position as a nurse. I have seen many "failed" WLS patients at work. And when I discuss it with them...I realize 99.9% of the time they are not following the program or never really followed the program, or have lost motivation. In that sense, I can talk to them as a healthcare professional as well as a post surgical patient with great results. Many of the times they don't want to hear what I have to say....but one or two have listened.
You can't save everyone - but you can lead through example and help those who wish to know more understand.
Pam
There are lots and lots of times I want to "help" people - but really - they wouldn't listen and would probably take offense to it. Andy once said at a meeting he would just love to go up to some people and say "I can save you" and yet you can't just go and do that.
If it fits into the conversation - I will mention it. Like if somebody says to me "I don't know how you do so much in your life I get tired just thinking about it" I tell them that I didn't used to be this productive, or, if I was forced to do so, would be achey and tired and sore for a long time afterward. I tell them I could not do what I do without losing over a hundred pounds through a new dedication to a healthy life style and with the help of my gastric bypass tool. Now, granted...most times it's not to strangers....but there have been a few.
I am also put in a different position as a nurse. I have seen many "failed" WLS patients at work. And when I discuss it with them...I realize 99.9% of the time they are not following the program or never really followed the program, or have lost motivation. In that sense, I can talk to them as a healthcare professional as well as a post surgical patient with great results. Many of the times they don't want to hear what I have to say....but one or two have listened.
You can't save everyone - but you can lead through example and help those who wish to know more understand.
Pam
Instead of complaining that the rosebush has thorns, be happy that the thorn bush has roses. 
I have had the same feelings. I sort of feel like I was sleeping and was that person and now I am more (not totally) awake and can "see" so many things about my eating that I was unconscious about before. I don't know if that makes any sense but that's how it feels. And I am overwhelmed sometimes by wanting to help them but I know we can't. I just try to honor the intention - the one where I want to help and feel compassion for that person. I think the energy of that is pretty special, even if we can't manifest it by actually helping them, the energy of compassion and a desire to help are a good thing.
Keri
Keri
When I see someone eating like that, I don't hate them, I don't pity them, I just understand what it is they're going through.
I've had very long, very deep discussions with potential surgery patients, but I have initiated none of them. I'm of the opinion that if you have to suggest to someone "Hey, you should consider weight loss surgery," then they're probably not ready for it.
I've had very long, very deep discussions with potential surgery patients, but I have initiated none of them. I'm of the opinion that if you have to suggest to someone "Hey, you should consider weight loss surgery," then they're probably not ready for it.
I feel the same way. My sister lost weight the wrong way, and inhales so much food now its gross, and of course throws it all up so she stays skinny. But I agree, someone could have talked to me everyday about WLS and I would have laughed. Today I am ready... so I listen to what people have to say, especially people that have already had WLS because you've been through it.
When I first started back on solid foods was when I noticed how much and how fast everyone around me was eating, and it was a real eye-opener for me, because I realized that was how I ate and how much I ate. I ate so fast that I never realized how much I was shoving in until I was stuffed and miserable!
So no, you're no hypocrit - none of us are - but it does keep us aware of how we got so big in the first place and how far we've come to try and be healthier. And like everyone else I would never initiate a converstion with someone about having the surgery - if someone asks I will definitely share my story - I have no qualms at all about that. But I had doctors who politely suggested I look into WLS over the past couple of years and I would get hurt feelings and convince myself that I was just not 'that' fat and I could lose it on my own. I had to come to the realization myself that I was beyond typical diets and exercise and that I needed a better tool.
Kathy
So no, you're no hypocrit - none of us are - but it does keep us aware of how we got so big in the first place and how far we've come to try and be healthier. And like everyone else I would never initiate a converstion with someone about having the surgery - if someone asks I will definitely share my story - I have no qualms at all about that. But I had doctors who politely suggested I look into WLS over the past couple of years and I would get hurt feelings and convince myself that I was just not 'that' fat and I could lose it on my own. I had to come to the realization myself that I was beyond typical diets and exercise and that I needed a better tool.
Kathy
'One shoe can change your life'...Cinderella
Steve,
I am pre-op and have had so much stress...the other day I ate 1/2 a box of chocolate covered donuts while reading. I "inhaled" them. Then I felt guilty and very nauseous (you play you pay). I am working with a nutrtionist now and that was a big no-no. I screwed up big time!
It's not hypocritical to feel that way about someone else doing bad behavior when you recognize your "old" self in that person. I tell everyone who asks that I am preparing for WLS. (even tho I did a boo-boo) because I am embarrased about my size. I am saying "I am trying to fix this" because I feel peoples' disapproval.
But before I saw my 400 lb Grannie suffer and die from congestive heart failure, I never cared about my weight. My theory was "If you don't like my looks turn your head". My hubby had always accepted my weight even as I got bigger. It took seeing Gran suffer to remember her warnings that she didn't want me to "end up like her". Of course I had thought about WLS before that but always brushed it off as "too drastic".
I am back on track now, and behaving. Just my .02 cents.
I am pre-op and have had so much stress...the other day I ate 1/2 a box of chocolate covered donuts while reading. I "inhaled" them. Then I felt guilty and very nauseous (you play you pay). I am working with a nutrtionist now and that was a big no-no. I screwed up big time!
It's not hypocritical to feel that way about someone else doing bad behavior when you recognize your "old" self in that person. I tell everyone who asks that I am preparing for WLS. (even tho I did a boo-boo) because I am embarrased about my size. I am saying "I am trying to fix this" because I feel peoples' disapproval.
But before I saw my 400 lb Grannie suffer and die from congestive heart failure, I never cared about my weight. My theory was "If you don't like my looks turn your head". My hubby had always accepted my weight even as I got bigger. It took seeing Gran suffer to remember her warnings that she didn't want me to "end up like her". Of course I had thought about WLS before that but always brushed it off as "too drastic".
I am back on track now, and behaving. Just my .02 cents.
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