Ice cream "Meltdown" <--- I'm so clever.

Try to start living by my motto:

Say to yourself...
"Go ahead and buy that ___________. You deserve it!"

I've racked up a nice credit card bill with that motto, but it is something that my therapist and I worked on...as far as feeling (genuinely feeling) like you do deserve.  I never thought I deserved anything....happiness, beauty, success...etc.  But over time, we have worked on the whole self and this whole "deserving" part surely falls into place.

Everyone "deserves".

SO go ahead and buy yourself that ice cream. You deserve it!

You are incredibly tough on yourself....and why you have been so damn successful in the past 16 months.

I have basically stopped thinking of "deserving" a treat.  Because before WLS that was my roller coaster ride...I would be on a diet...I would "deserve" a treat for all my hard work...and one treat would turn into a whole lot of treats.

I now try to just simply have a balanced diet.  I am basically maintaining now.  I have bought sf ice cream.  And in all honesty -there have been times where I have noticed myself ONLY wanting that instead of my other food choices.  And when that happens - I have one serving - and if it becomes a demon and begins calling me - it goes into the sink with ho****er and is thrown out.l  A waste of money?  Yea, probably...buying 1/2 a gallon to eat one serving.  But it's what I sometimes need to do.

I stress sometimes.  There have been other times where that ice cream has sat so long in my freezer that it has become freezer burnt and I throw it out anyway.  Because I'm just not interested in it.

I just had this conversation with hubby - for the first time, I feel mostly in control.  I have learned "moderation" to a degree. Granted - that moderation is with sf/ff options.  I don't experiment with having just one or two pieces of regular candy or what not.  When hubby and I went down the shore a few months ago he got those darn butterfly fries with cheese sauce.  I had literally 2 pices of it, felt sick, realized what I was doing...and haven't looked back.

You're not the first to cry over icecream....many of us have been there.  And you won't be the last.  And you do "deserve" happiness - and if that moment happiness is ice cream....fine.....because although food isn't happiness and led us down a road where we were completely UNHAPPY...sometimes being "normal" and having ice cream when we want it (all be it sugar free low fat) is.....

Pam