May I whine a bit?

About what you say? Let me preface by saying things are going so great seven months down the WLS road. I am down 138 pounds since my surgery date. My six months visit with the surgeon went well. He said my labs are better than his. I have about 20-30 pounds to get to my goal, although I do feel that if I didn't lose another pound I would be at peace with that. I feel so incredible - healthy, able to move about, Christmas shop (that does count as daily excercise right?) till I drop. Some sweet moments this month....I went to my husbands work Xmas party at a fancy downtown hotel ballroom. Lots of standing around with drinks, sit down meal, games, etc. I didn't dread it. I wore a fitted outfit that really revealed to me how far I have come! Oh yes, high heal shoes for the first time in at least a decade. I ate appetizers, dinner, a couple bites of the dessert - no problems. I have avoided things like that for years, so uncomfortable with myself. Also, this weekend was the beginning of my daughter's gymnastic meet season. In the past, difficulties included gyms with rickety, cheap, plastic folding chairs that I hoped wouldn't break. They didn't, but they hurt to sit on for five hours. They are always crowded, crowd events. Instead of just enjoying my daughter's performance, I was usually suffering in some way physically or just feeling so self concious. Walking long corridors, climbing bleachers, being hot when no one else was, etc. All difficult. My husband has had to take her to out of state meets (Las Vegas, San Diego, Boise, Phoenix) because I just couldn't travel well. It really hurt me to miss those years, and not be able to enjoy some of the exciting moments. Well, this weekend was great! She scored her first nine on vault (always her worst event) and all of the above mentioned problems were gone for me! All I was doing was thinking of the girls. I am the one taking her to Cancun in January. I have tried on the bathing suit - I'm not going to turn heads, because I'm not a perfect ten, OR a 320 pound lady. Oh yeah, I was going to whine. I really don't believe in spot reduction, and have figured that my body would release the fat from where ever it still has it. So far it has been pretty evenly coming off. I have reached a point where the remaining fat is mostly in my abdomen. In recent weeks I have started to notice that instead of letting go of my abdominal fat, I am losing in places I already lost a lot (like my legs, face, waist). I think sit ups or crunches will help with building muscle & toning, but like I said, I don't really buy that one can target a spot to lose. As a result, my butt and lower back are getting pretty bony. At first I was thrilled, or amused. I have been relieved of my lower back pain with all of this weight loss, but now I am starting to really experience pain from these bones. When I sit, I feel like my tailbone is protruding. The meet was in Eugene. After driving there and back, the two bones in my butt and the tailbone were making me uncomfortable. I even feel it when I sit on my very soft, cushy couch. I don't think sitting on a pillow would help, because it is bothering me when I'm on soft, overstuffed furniture. I'm still in the 180's. I have been in the 140's (I was young) and didn't feel this. I think being so big has compromised the tissue structure, and so sitting has the pancake effect. It isn't like my butt even looks bony. I have actually started to worry I am going to get a pressure sore, but maybe it just feels that way. I don't think that is really a danger. Jeez, enough about me! Anyone else have this happen when their weight came off? A woman in my support group had a lower body lift and breast lift (lucky girl!). She pointed out that the plastic surgery is far more than cosmetic. The reconstruction of damage caused by morbid obesity is a big part of it. She has experienced much relief of things that were causing trouble to her. I wonder if my probem falls in that category? Patty

Well, I loved reading your post, whine or not! LOL! I have to say that I have felt the boney butt syndrome myself and I'm still quite a bit heavier than you right now (at 223.....ever so slowly inching downwards). I don't know what PS would do for losing too much in one area though - but it should help a lot with the excess in the tummy area. I have the same problem. I used to be very thin in the waist when I was young. I was always fat, but I always carried it in my butt and thighs. Well, when I was this weight years ago, pants were a nightmare. I would have to buy a size to fit my butt and legs, but they would gap horribly when I sat down because my waist was too small. Now I am finding that the abdominal fat is hanging on quite nicely and at least, if I have one thing to say that is positive about it, at least my pants are fitting more like a normal person's pants. I thought I was going to escape that panni rash but I was sorely mistaken. I have to get into the doctor and start documenting this if I have any hopes insurance will pay for it. Are you considering any of this? Dina

I am planning to do plastic surgery down the road. I have gotten not a single rash that I could document. I don't have any hope for getting it covered by insurance, although I am thinking I might be able to accomplish them paying for a breast lift by qualifying for a breast reduction. After all this loss I am still a DD, and a droopy one at that. I would be much happier with a high up, C cup. On the other hand, I worry that my body shape is kind of meant for the DD, and getting smaller would make the in and out of the hips look bigger. O.K. ....I'm not caught up in how things look right!? I only did this for my health right!? After so many years of not allowing my mind to even go there (because it was so hopeless) it somehow feels a bit healthy to care about wanting to look good too. I am already loving the health benefits! Can sound a bit wacky, but I thinking my hope for getting the PS is going to Brazil. For a girl who went to Mexico for WLS I am sure you understand that it can be a safe and viable option. A woman in my support group just got back from Brazil. She is a very cautious, intelligent woman, *****searched it for two years. Brazil is the plastic surgery capital of the world, catering to wealthy Europeans and Americans. Including airfare and accomodations it is 1/3 of the cost of doing it here. Patty

geeeze patty, if that's what you call whining girl BRING IT ON.... LOL no seriously you are going through a normal part of the WLS after effects. I have experienced this myself and seen it hundreds of times on the main board.. "the bony butt sydrome"... funny thing to think let alone say.... LOL my opinon on this is that our bones went soooooooooooo long with out ever touching hard surfices and now they have been thrown back into doing there job on there own with out the FAT CUSION to absorb they are gonna hurt for a while.. for me I don't notice it so much anymore. but that first year was really something.. sleeping on my sides hurt my ribs and hip bones and sitting on anything hurt my butt.. it was silly considering I wasn't 98 lbs after all. in that case it would make since but at 180, 160, and even 145?? that just isn't logical.. so that's my theory!! we took away the shock absorbers.... LOL bones must do there jobs now!! it still amazes me to lay on my side and have my hip bones stick out. or look in the mirror and see a rib cage... I hope it always leaves me some what in shock to see this.. it means I REMEBER WHEN!! and yes, that dam abdominal fat is the toughest.. when I was young my fat always was in my thighs.. I was nicked named "thunder thighs".. now I have normal thighs, no ass, and a small'ish stomach but my "waist fat" is my problem.. if my pants fit me perfectly in ass and thighs they are tight in the waist.. and being from the "80's" my waist is NOT around my hip bones.. LOL Theresa

It is good to know it is a fairly normal part of the post-op experience. I can certainly live with it - a lot easier than the before problems! Now on the why I am so friggin cold! My fingers and feet. People say it is because I am not fat anymore, and lost all that insulation. I get that, but I wasn't this cold when I weighed 140 pounds? It isn't like I am down anywhere near a low body fat weight. My husband and I are playing a cat and mouse game with the thermostat, I want it above 70 degrees. Patty

freezing???? can we say FROST BITE???? and no I don't think it has much to do with the insulation thing at all.. I was freezing the day after surgery and have been ever since and that was when I was living in HOT HUMID FLORIDA.. acutally the only time I warm up is if the weather/temp is above 82. I bought my self an electric blanket and have worn the darn thing out... it's pretty sad!! as for what you said to dina about the whole health vs looking good thing... NOTHING is wrong with wanting to look as good as you FEEL!! "healthy people look GREAT"... so enjoy and don't you dare feel a bit guilty about wanting to!! boob jobs here we come!! LOL and brazil?? oh hell, I wanna go to!! a boob job and brazillian men too?? oh heaven!! LOL.. ok, I'm done.. Theresa

Hi Patty! My surgeon actually warned me about this before I went under the knife for my RNY. As I understand it, the layers of skin on a normal sized person's rear end will sort of "rub together" (from sitting and laying) and over years cause a sort of callous between the layers....which gives a certain amount of comfort. When your rear end bulks up and the skin is streched in that area....the layers of skin no longer rub together and you lose that "callous"...and the extra padding keeps you comfortable so you don't even know you lost them. Because it takes years and years to develope....when people lose weight and bulk rapidly....they end up with sore bums for a very long time because they no longer have the callous nor the extra fat for padding...possibly never getting those handly little callouses (is that plural for callous?) back. Anyway...hope that isn't real bad knews.....but I don't think it's a bone thing as much as it is a skin thing. Hope the info helps! Happy Holidays! -Mary P

Thanks Mary. I knew that had to be some phsyical explanation how a person at 185 could be feeling so bony?! I can deal with it, and I am sure that exercise will help build up some muscle to help with the structure. It is interesting that your doctor even warned you about it. Thanks, Patty

Patty, It's so wonderful to hear about your "new life"...and the things you don't have to stress out about...or think twice about. Congrats on your progress with your weight. I'm at about 243, but have started to experience some of the discomfort you mention...mostly in my ribs because I've lost more on top than on the bottom. It hurts to lie on my side. I have heard of several people going thru your experience w/your backside, it's not uncommon at all! Unfortunately..no one I know has been able resolve this issue....it just takes time. Take care sweets! Michele

Hey Michele, I really can deal with it, because as I said in my post....there are so many sweet moments coming my way! I am so happy you got your surgery too. Can you believe how quickly everything changes? Really, it was two weeks after surgery that I already felt so much better. It is all just too wonderful! The rest of life still goes on, throwing curve balls here and there, but it is all so much easier to deal with, not having to also deal with M.O.! Patty