Is it strange....

Hey all, Well, less than 48 hours till surgery! People keep asking me if I'm excited, and I feel like I should be saying "YES!" but I'm really not. Don't get me wrong, I AM looking forward to having WLS, and I'm neither scared or having second thoughts, it's just been such a long, emotional process that I feel kinda numb. Anyone else feel like this? Blessings, -Perk Perry P. Perkins Novelist Just Past Oysterville: Shoalwater Book One www.perryperkinsbooks.com

Hi perry, yup... pretty much! but this was not my first surgery. I had, had 4 previous for another disease. Also I knew my surgeon very well as he had operated on my son two years previous for crohns disease and I also had worked at the hospital I was staying in.. but the biggest thing for me was that I was *ready* for what ever the outcome. In my mind I was already dead, as in I wasn't *living*... some what morbid way of thinking but it got me through. I was so calm that I didn't have anyone at the hospital with me... I didn't want them to ruin a day by waiting at the hospital.. My son dropped me off and then returned while I was in surgry in time for our surgeon to talk to him... I didn't find this out until about a month after surgery.. and of course I was going through the "fat cell estrogen release" so I bawled my eyes out thinking how much my baby loves me..... ok, so now thinking about it I still tear up... LOL good luck and can't wait to hear from ya on the loosing side!! Theresa

Hi Perry- I remember feeling numb for the last couple of weeks. I was so very ready....and just kind of retreated inside myself. Then I got sick with a whopping cold...I wasn't about to tell anyone...I didn't want my surgery postponed for anything. Let me tell you how bad it was waking up from surgery and coughing and coughing and coughing for 3 days straight from that stupid cold. Anyway....I assure you that in a couple of weeks you will forget the dread and the numbness and just be on your way to your new life. Congratulations and I will be keeping you in my thoughts. Take Care, Shelley

I was numb until the day before and I went off the deep end for a few hours. Congrats on the big day tomorrow! Looks like today you will be on liquids and "the treatment". Gervais? I am just a few miles from you. I live in Keizer. If you ever want to get together, send me a note. -Chris

Perk - I had the same experience, as I'm sure many others did! And when it was time to go and I got to the hospital, I was as calm as could be. I've never been so calm before something major before. In fact, going to the dentist brings up more anxiety than that did. But I credit God with this because I laid it all on Him. I knew He wouldn't bring me this far to have me experience something I wasn't meant to experience. Anyway, time is narrowing even further and tomorrow is your day! I hope we are able to hear from you soon after letting us know it was a breeze! Dina

Hey Perry! Today you might be suffering through all that pre-op stuff that will last most of the day.... so you're probably not going to sweat it too much as you very well could be busy going from one test to the next. I was so freaked out the last couple of weeks before my surgery...knowing I could possibly die.... thinking about the drive to the hospital and how torturous that would be, and how I would think of every possible morbid outcome. What actually transpired was the opposite: During my pre-op testing the day before surgery, everyone involved (lab techs, anesthesiologist, the doc and his surgical nurse, etc..) was so stinking cavalier about the whole procedure. It seemed so ordinary and routine that I actually shed every bit of fear and anxiety. I slept like a baby the night before surgery. I didn't freak out until I had to say good-bye to my husband as they rolled me into the surgery prep room.... and I was drugged, so I wasn't in full control of my mental faculties. They wheeled me into the operating room and there were what seemed to be 4-5 people busy doing stuff to my arms and legs while the anesthesiologist was giving me the magic mist. The next thing I knew they were all busy trying to wake me up....except I thought they were still trying to get me to sleep. That's how fast it went...and my operation was 5 hours (open RNY with gull bladder removal). Boom! I'm out. Boom! I'm awake. Just like that....no dreams...no nothing. Anyway....I guess I'm just telling you all this to ease your mind. None of the many scenarios I went through in my mind for the months prior the surgery ever manifested. It was a very different experience than I had anticipated (this was my first major surgery). Good luck to you, friend. We'll all be here when your done doing what you have to do. -Mary P