ok I need help prayers, good thoughts what ever you do

I need a few warriors out there, its getting really bad,, her work wants to get rid of her, looking for a reason,, she is trying so hard to keep the job so she has the insurance to pay the bills, Her boss so heartless, The neurologist is very time restricted and says if she does not answer her phone the one and only time he will call her today he will just pass the surgery off to whom ever is on call at the hospital and we really want the best,, her boss says if she answers her phone at work she will be fired!!!   I told her to put that phone in pocket and if the Dr calls answer it,,, if she gets fired she gets fired,,, But I also told her to take a bathroom break,, PRAY stop crying buck up and trust   GOD he will take care of it,, and if getting fired happens well then so be it but just maybe the call will come in on her break or lunch :)   Oh its so hard for me to let go and let god,, I want to go down there and tell off the boss and the DR,, :) Tell them how incredibly heartless they all are. instead I am praying for them asking for god to open there eyes and heart to what this woman is going thru.   seems to be working the dr called me and asked for her bosses phone # to talk to her and try to convince her how important it is that jen be able to answer her phone,, just hope it does not back fire :0   BUT GOD IS IN CONTROL EVEN IF I TAKE IT BACK IN 2 MINUTES I WILL LET IT GO AGAIN!!  

Kelly, I do so pray for your daughter, her uncaring surgeon and boss and of course her Mom!  Hang in there.  Hopefully it will all work out and she will have her surgey soon.  Is the surgeon calling to schedule the surgery?  It is a very hard job being a Mom huh!  Prayers---Julia

oh yes this mom stuff is not for wussys. I feel so drained and beaten.  she has an appointment with a different surgen on monday for some reason the one we were trying for wont take her as a patient i dont know why? oh man just cant take much more of this

My prayers are with you both also.  My God, what kind of boss is this that will fire someone for answering the phone.  I hope they are soon visited by three spirits in the night.  Linda

I'm pretty darn certain her boss is close to (if he hasn't already) breaking the law.  According to ADA and FMLA (if she qualifies) she's allowed the time off and it can be intermittent.  If you need the name of a good lawyer, I have one for you. My bosses were jerks for me, too.  I actually had one say that, if I were really as "sick" as I said I was, then why wasn't I out on disability.  Four years later I was driven to that point... Anyway, they did back down a bit after they got a "nice" letter from my lawyer.  I could find a copy and send it to you but what was really important wasn't the letter -- but the letterhead.  When my boss gave me that threat I told him he'd hear from my attorney.  And he did. I will also tell you that I contacted the EEOC (for the ADA violations) and, although I had a winnable case, I would continue to have issues at work and nothing would really be resolved.  Technically there was very little tooth to the rules that they broke.  Oh, and I was union for what little help and support they provided me... Even if they use your daughters absences as "justification" for firing her (hey, if she likes her job and they pull tha****ch out) then she'll have grounds for a lawsuit and a complaint with the EEOC that may get her job back along with back pay.  At the least.  We're not talking about enough $$ to make her rich but to help get her life back together and keep the insurance. I also second Casey if that's where she's going.  I hope your daughter the best and that she gets everything under control.  You're a good, dedicated mother. Lori

Kelly, I am so sorry that Jen continues to be troubled by this condition.  I have been recovering from my knee replacement surgery (12/3).  It went very well, though I feel like this week has been the hardest one of all.  It gets tough to move through the forming scar tissue and keep bending the knee, and we are all kind of tired of me and the knee thing.  I have great hope that it is going to be much better, but right now the difficulty bending has got me a bit worried.  It seems insane that one has to depend on a new job (or any job) to receive needed medical care.  When so sick it should even factor in to have to keep trying to make it to work.  It is the worst worry in the world to keep hoping for a better day for your kids health.  I think it will be a better thing in the long run to have a mechanical aid in draining the fluid, because it doesn't seem like the drugs are helping enough.  You don't want her sight comprised any more than it has been!  Being in her twenties and sick still makes her a kid, and she is lucky you are there with her.  To get to the point where you are all stressing about whether a phone call comes during her break or not is crazy.  Her immediate manager doesn't/shouldn't have such power that this is how things have evolved.  I'm sure it can be frustrating for them too, but I can't imagine an individual and the other co-workers could be so heartless?!? Keep us posted.  I will be thinking of you and your daughter and wishing for things to start getting better!  Take care of yourself so that you can be there for her. Patty

Patty, Oh Sweetie its so good to hear from you. ou have been on my mind alot. I have wanted to call and check on you a few times but I am carrying a heavy load right now and dont want to be the friend that calls and lays a buch of stuff on you at this time in your life. I remember my mom having a hard time with the stiffness and scar tissue it does get better and the rehabilitation is very very hard and painful. just take it one day at a time friend it will get better. I remember my mom feeling at first like she wished she did not have the sugrey but soon after she was glad she did. you will get there I promise. :)  Yes we are very worried about jen. Sunday night she was so bad that monday she just quit her job. She just couldent take the stress anymore. I was behind her 100% I just wish she could get better and start her life again. Tomorrow is her birthday she is now 28 feels like she is a looser living with her mom no job nothing great in her life.  we saw the surgon, he is wanting more tests. in the mean time her symptoms are getting worse. of corse they have to get the insurance approval before they can do the tests and he wont even talk to us about surgery without the tests. the nerologist wants the surgery done asap. Jen is very very bad today she talked to the nerolosist he is going to call the surgon tomarrow and see if he can help him understand how bad she is.  OMG Patty i just dont know what to do any more ,, Dr dont seem to be able to decide what the best thing is so how do we know which one is right?  well sweety I am exhausted call me if you feel up to it Kel

I'd say Jen couldn't continue working - though it seems like she shouldn't have had to quit.  I don't know anything about medical leaves, but it sure seems like she ought to have been eligible for one!  I guess I am naive (despite seeing the movie Sicko) but I can't believe decisions are being made, or that treatment of such a SERIOUS condition is being delayed or not done, because of confirmation of insurance.  After years of spending time on this site hurting for everyone that is fighting so hard to get weight loss surgery to save their life, I guess I should know better.  We need national health care!   When I lived in California the county hospital HAD to treat you -  whether you could pay or not.  Is the Oregon Health Plan not for instances like Jen's?  Probably not when she had her job.  Call me any time kid!  I do not have your phone number.  My knee is coming along.  I am sure I lose prospective of my progress.  It just seems like it will never feel "normal" but every few days I realize "hey I can do this".  My old attitudes about going to gyms and/or being around people really into physical fitness made me think I wasn't going to like the physical therapy.  I did feel that way the first couple of times, but as time has gone on I have found it to be invaluable!  They have made all the difference and I actually would hate to miss an appointment.  I would love it if I got real on my intention to start swimming again, but I manage to hang on to that old habit of procrastination.  I am relieved I didn't gain any weight during my recovery.  I was worried about that.  I pray Jen gets some relief soon! Patty

hey sweetie, we are scheduled for surgery on wendsday the 16th around 4 pm I had to throw a few fits but I got people moving. again we are waiting for approval from the insurance company but the Dr's office manager says we should be fine to keep that surgery date.  I will call you :)  thanks friend

Hang in there Kelly!  Even if by fingers and toes! Ha.  Sometimes being a Mother is sooooooo hard!  God IS in control.  All will end well....maybe not as quick as you or Jen would like...but all things happen the way He needs them too...we just may not understand right now the why, what etc....  I had a heartless boss once....that ended up firing me and I remember my Mom thinking I was crazy for not being more upset...but it ended up being the best thing that could have happened for me at the time!  Just put your faith in God and trust that He knows what He is doing.  All things happen for a reason.  I will put you both in my prayers and remember if you start to lose your grip...that you have friends right here in Oregon!