very upset

what do when someone you love said to you u took the easy way out.......  this is my mom im talking about she has been making me feel werid  saying thing to hurt me like... once i was excited telling her that guys were checking me out now and she said with a tummy like that  or once i told her that wear a size ten now she said how could you with that tummy and other comments about my wow monets that hurt like hell   cut me to the bone she has always been there for me so i dont get this  so tonight i called her to talk to her about it  and she said i took the easy way out and that she gets upset and it hurts  her to hear about my wow monets cuz i dont have to work hard to lose weigh  like she does   i just want someone to share in my happy times  but she only hurts me what to do

I am so sorry your mom just doesn't get it.  I too have a mom that just doesn't get it, I have not told her yet that I am in the process for gastric bypass surgery, I am so worried that she too will be hurtful like your mom.  The best advise I can give you is to try to stay away from the subjuect with your mom and share your WOW moments with people who will be supportive and happy for you. Best of luck to you and congrats on such a great weight loss!!! amy

Your mother is jealous. Plane and simple. Google "dealing with Jealousy" and see what you get. When I am around my mother, I avoid the subject of my weight, dieting, how terrible I feel about myself, nothing she can turn into showing me her disappointment  in my weight gain. Now I am apprehensive about telling her I am planning on a Lap Band. I will tell her as soon as I have a surgery date. My mother does not understand my lack of will power (which she has in abundance naturally). I joke with her about not giving me her genetic metabolism and drive, instead my sperm donor was from a fat lazy family, (but he was once a handsome man) She has a great sense of humor, so she laughs. We can't confide EVERYTHING to our parents.  They are our parents, not our friends. No matter how old we are our mothers are our mothers. Good luck Kandy

I am so sorry to hear that!  I can't understand why someone who is supposed to back us could be so hurtful.  You however did not take the easy way out.  Does she really understand all the process we go through?  My mom has said that she  just hopes that I do not regret it later. Keep your chin up.  God  Bless, Rhonda

Just remember, we are all here for you when you need us.  Keep up the good work and you will be fine.  Sounds like your mom needs an education on what really happens to us after RNY. Cheers. Lisa 259-173-150

If you want to send your mother to me for a quick slap up the side of the head, I'd do it gladly.  Good for you for talking with her about it.  Do take the time to inform her about the facts.  No way, no how, is this the easy way out.  It is painful, it is difficult to distinguish bodily hunger from head hunger, and it sometimes seems unfair that you can't eat something you really want.  How in the world can she think that is easy?  People who make cutting remarks like that deserve their own little place in the corner of hell as far as I am concerned.  There is no way they can know what you are going through until they walk a mile in your shoes.  Your mom needs to grow up. Linda

Hey!  You just keep going girl.  Your mom is jealous and by no means did you take the easy weigh out.  Its rough sometimes and you went through a lot with your surgery and are still going strong.  We are here for you and just keep losing.  I have some to go and these are the hardest but I have my goal in sight.  My best friend of 20 some years dumped me when I started to lose the weight.  She hasn't spoken to me since January when she told me she couldn't be my friend anymore.  There are insecure people out there and your mom might be one.  Those are her issues not yours so keep on going.  Keep your eye on the finish line.  Best wishes Nancy