A rant...

I recently attended a local support group.  I am still not sure what to think. 

I am pre-op, and thought it would be helpful to meet with those who are either at the same stage, or have post-op – and learn from them.

I left there feeling rather dejected.  All had surgery 2-3 years ago, and are all gaining it back.  All are “cheating” – eating sugar, McDonalds, chips and chocolate.  Regularly.  I’m not trying to be judgmental, but I was disappointed.  I had hoped to meet people who were taking this seriously.  Just because you CAN eat/tolerate the above, doesn’t mean you should.   That’s my opinion.  I’m already making so many changes in my eating habits so that once the surgery is over, and I’ve got my new tool to assist further – that it won’t be a shock and I’ll already be on the right track.  Advice was “don’t eat the melba toast – that’ll lead to chips…”. Um no – I don’t eat the chips if I don’t’ BUY the chips.  Just sounded like a lot of trying to validate and make excuses for where they are now.  I know it can’t be easy, it’s not easy pre-op either.  I guess I was hoping to meet “mentors” so to speak.  Examples of how successful one can be if following the directions we’re provided.  I guess I’m just a bit frustrated and disappointed.  I’ll try again with another group in the next community. 

I totally get where you are coming from.  My 2 cents worth is some (not all)

 of the support meetings are for people to just socialize as they don't have friends outside of this.  They see it as an opportunity to eat and just hang out and talk.  I wanted meetings that weren't in a foodcourt and where people shared their success and talked about their struggles.  I didn't see that at our meetings so I quit going.  I talk to a few people who have gone through this when I need help or encouragement.  They have been very successful and stick to the plan.  That's why they are still maintaining their weight loss.  I was shocked to see some people at meetings drinking pop and eating crap food.  The only food at the foodcourt I would get is chili from Tim's. They were getting Chinese food for the most part.  I think the OH forum is your best support.  If you have specific questions I would be happy to answer them for you and can send you my cell in a PM.

Sorry your support group was such a bad experience. I have been to two. One I do not go back to because people kept stating the same problems but were not looking for ways to stop. They always had excuses why they could not eat better.

I go to another one that is just a few people locally and it is much better. We talk about many things as well as wls.

If possible try another group.

There are many of us working our program everyday.

Hey Helna-

i have a couple friends who are 3+ years out and have been incredibly inspiring and helpful. I would love to meet someone who is relatively close to my timeline- if you wanted to grab a coffee between our two appointments on the 26th I would love to!

message me and we can exchange fb/phone numbers if you're interested.

jess

I am sorry Helna. That sounds awful.  Are these support groups sanctioned by the hospital or are they public ones? I know at TWH they have in-hospital support groups and I would imagine they are quite different than what you are describing.

Not sure of your location, but I too would be interested in meeting up.

It was a private one - found through Facebook.  Nice people and very welcoming, just not quite what I am looking for.  I'm in Owen Sound, so getting to meetings at TWH are really difficult.  I wish they could do them via Skype!  It would be great to meet up :)