I suck!

Hey everyone!

I hope that everyone is doing AMAZING!! 

My post history sucks... I know, I know... I am just popping in to say hi and see where everyone is at!

I am now 10 months and 2 days post op RNY... down 121lbs from my highest weight... (although I am not done yet).. I was trying desperately to upload a before and now picture, alas OH does not want me bragging ;) so I can not. 

Things are pretty good... 10 months out and physically I feel amazing... I have had countless NSV's and a few pretty cool SV's too...  Its pretty cool to be able to shop anywhere... to cross your legs.. reach ALL your 2000 parts... etc...

The WLS journey is no walk in the park .. even if you have no complications... its a pretty big mind F#$*...  I am currently in a 10/12 Jeans but still look at myself and see fat.. everyone else gushes over how good I look but in my eyes I'm still fat AND I have skin that doesn't fit... its kind of interesting trying to get past that and try to see yourself through eyes that seem hell bent on lying to you!  So I try to focus on the size of clothing that a year ago I would have killed 3 people to fit into (and now do)... I also try to focus on the things I can do with ease now,.... and I hope that one day I will look in the mirror and see reality!  Either way I am overall thrilled with this whole journey... I would do this again in a second...

Interestingly as time progresses I find myself feeling a bit of sadness about the first year of my WLS journey coming to a close... its hard to explain... but the waiting and anticipation was hard, the last 10 months have been an amazing journey and one that is slowly turning back into "day in day out" life... The journey is life long but... still I'm missing the excitement of the start of it I guess... (like I said... hard to explain...lol)

Anywho, I am calling all my OH peeps out... like where in the world is Karen M??  I would love to see updates from all those like me who have been MIA for a while...

Jenn

Hi Jenn

Great to hear how well you are doing.

I am 13 months out and doing good I am down 130 lbs from my HW and loving it. My weight stalled around 10 -11 months out and has moved up and down a few pounds the last few months. I am currently dealing with the sugar/carb monster trying to get it under control as it creeped back into my life the last couple of months.

Waiting on the warmer weather to get here as I want to get out on my bike I have been taking spinning classes and loving it and set a goal to do 50K in the Becel Heart and Stroke ride on the DVP. I may even trying running with hubby as I have been doing some running on treadmill and its going not bad.

Hope others comment as well would be good to hear from others.

Lynn

Sounds like you are doing awesome too Lynn!  I too can not wait for the warmer weather... I did not do well getting out in the cold this winter... I hybornated! 

50km bike ride sounds...... exhausting!  But rewarding!  I will be watching for you!!

I love this post!

You have said so many things that are going through my mind too...from not seeing the weight loss to feeling sad the first year is over...you hit the nail right on the head! Thank you for sharing, congrats on your success to date & future success :)

Its a trip isnt it?? 

Wow Jenn, Lynn and LilyBugsMommy. I echo what you have posted. Thanks for this post. It really helped me feel "normal". I am 11 months post-op as of yesterday. I can identify with everything you three posted. The sadness, the fact that I don't see myself the way other do.  I am down 116 pounds and have been dealing with being a little stalled. Mostly self inflicted. I am exercising 5 days a week for at least an hour a day. I find that I need to eat back some of the exercise calories or I would be in the negative for calories consumed versus burned. Sometimes I get to the end of the day and I am still hungry so I have a snack at bedtime. Now I have recently read that if you are hungry at bedtime you may just be thirsty. I am trying to get all my fluids in by 5:00. I am hoping that it will allow me to sleep through the night so I am not up all night peeing. So the dilemma is do I drink before bed to keep from eating and risk being up in the night or do I eat and take in a few extra calories so I can sleep. I have my 12 month follow up and will be meeting with the social worker to talk some of this through. Head hunger versus real hunger versus thirst.

Take care ladies sand thank for listening. 

Karen

Oh wow, what a great post and fantastic replies! Yup, carbs/cravings sneaking in, need to keep on track. Stalls, oh boy! Head hunger or thirst? Holy! Peeing all night, lol, let me tell ya! Lets not forget this lovely skin, oh the skin! I can't wait to see my ps to talk about getting rid of this skin. I just can't see the skinny me everyone keeps saying that I am, what the heck eh? Me, skinny?? What!!! 

Wouldnt change a thing, my life has completely changed for the better and I don't remember feeling this great,ever. I have read this so many times, but until it's happening to you, its hard to understand, but really, my head needs to catch up with my weight loss. I still see big Annette, not big, I mean big, couldn't sit in the arena seats big (yup, I am a hockey Mom). Couldn't find shoes that fit or pants, shirts, underwear, oh jeepers, you all know what I am talking about right! That's all totally changed.

Great post pal, this journey is amazing, wonderful we can share it here with each other.

Annette 😄

Great post Jenn. I  am almost 9 months out and still have a hard time with what i see in the mirror..I in a size 6-7 jean and med tops and i still see a large person in the mirror. Its a hard thing to wrap my head around. I am so waiting for some warm weather to get walking more. I think this winter has been so hard on everyone....Congrats on your weight loss , great job...Krista..

Hi JENN!!!

Nice to hear from you. You are doing amazing!! Congrats. Most professionals, and post-WLS patients alike will say that it took a full two years to come to terms with the new you. Body dysmorphia is on full-speed for a lot of us for a bit. I felt after my plastics that I no longer see a fat person. But, I still see the imperfections (extra skin). However, I am much happier, and I love being fit (if not FIRM lol).

Karen has been on and off for a bit. She had a bit of a rough go, which she posted about in January (or Feb, I can't remember).

Take care!

Kelly

Hey Jenn, nice to see you again! Glad things have gone well for you since surgery.  I know how you feel re: the end of the initial "excitement" of the sudden weight loss.

Strangely enough, I don't seem to be suffering from the body dysmorphia that you mention and that I keep hearing about from others who have lost a lot of weight. My self-esteem is through the roof, even though I seem to have stopped losing now and I hover between 175 and 180, so I've lost around 160 lbs or so. I'm anywhere from a size 10-14 depending on the cut of the clothing, but usually a size 12. I'm flabby around the middle and have a killer muffin top, but shapewear helps take care of that when I'm wearing fitted clothes, and in general I feel really great, and have no problem looking in the mirror now. :)  I'm taking CBT at TWH to try to wrap my head around cravings and urges to eat compulsively which are creeping back, but I haven't been gaining weight, so in general I'm happy the way I am now.

I'm also discovering that I can ride a bicycle, which I'm excited about. Since today is going to be the first really nice weather day in a while, above 0 in Toronto, I'm going to take the plunge and ride my bike to work for the first time today. I'm a bit nervous because it's a little further than I've ridden before, and there are a couple of really big hills along the way, but I'm looking forward to the challenge. And the route to work also has a bus on it with bike racks, so if I find I can't quite do the whole distance, I can always load the bike on a bus and ride part way. But I'm hoping I don't have to.  I've cycled to TWH and back easily, which is 9 km one way, and my work is 11 km one way (but with big hills - no major hills on the way to TWH), so I think I can manage it if I leave myself enough time to do it and possibly walk my bike up the heartbreak hill. :)

Glad you're doing well, that's the update on me. :) Have a great day!