Don't know what to do now

Hi all in Oklahoma. I had pretty much made up my mind that I would have lap rny once my 6 month doctor supervised weight program was up. But, yesterday, I found out that a 33 year old mom with 3 children died from this procedure using the surgeon I was planning on using. It really has scared me. I would love to be thin and healthier, but I want to live to see my children grow up as well (I know it is a gamble - stay heavy with health problems or put your life in the hands of a surgeon). Has anyone else heard stories about their surgeon prior to having wls. When I saw my surgeon in October, he told me he had never had anyone die from this surgery. Now, from reading this message board, I know he has. If the facts are correct, when she had surgery, her opening was not large enough to get anything to stay down and had to go back in for surgery. This caused two infections and her bowels shut down. She died two days before Christmas. How tragic. Any thoughts from anyone out there. I really don't know what to think right now.

Rita, Sweetie, of course you know that anyone undergoing ANY surgery has the risk of dying. If I remember correctly the risk with WLS is around 1 in 200. So you have a 0.05% chance of that being you. I know it is a scary thought, but I am assuming that this is a very educated decision that you have come to. And to put it bluntly, if you don't have surgery and remain MO, chances are you will die young anyway. Personally, if I had children, I think I would be more apt to have this surgery, because I would be able to spend more "quality time" with them and doing things with them. This is just my opinion and I know everyone will feel differently about this. It is not a decision to come to lightly. If you are religious, talk with God about it. Place it all in his hands. He will do what is right for you and your family. My phrase through all of this was "if He brings me to it, He will bring me through it." I know, it's very cliche', but it worked for me. I sounds like you have done a lot of homework on your surgeon. My main ?? I would have for him is "how many Gastric Bypass surgeries has he performed, and what are his complication rates and deaths." Most doctors are going to be more that willing to be honest with you. Personally, I think this was the best decision I came to thus far in my life. I am about 3 1/2 months post op and have lost 75lbs. I feel better than I have in years. I still want to lose about another 80lbs, and for the first time in my life, I see that as a possibility thanks to this surgery. Hope I was able to help you in any way. Feel free to email me anytime with questions or if you just want to talk. Shelby Claremore, OK

Hi Rita, I know how you feel. It is frightening dealing with the possibility of death from this surgery. I would definitly be concerened about why the opening was created so small in this woman, perhaps you should discuss this with the doctor. I am scheduled to have surgery in May and every day I go through the what ifs. I also realize that this is normal and is to be expected. For my self I weigh the pros and cons daily and the pros always outweigh the cons. I have 4 children, two very young while the other two are grown and I want to be able to spend quality time with them, to keep up with them, which is getting harder to do at my present weight. Good luck with your journey.

Rita, I can imagine it would be terrifying to find out your specific surgeon has had such a recent tragedy! I can't tell you what to do, but I would suggest talking with your surgeon. Share your fears with him! Naturally, he has to be limited by patient privilege in what he can discuss, but he can offer specific answers to your questions - including any plans to avoid the same concerns in you and other patients (I know three months before I had surgery, a woman here died from a blood clot. Her surgeon, and mine because of his influence, immediately began doing dopplar exams on ALL patients prior to surgery to help avoid another death like that one). After you talk to him, go with your heart. You will know if you are still comfortable in his hands or if you need to seek another surgeon. This is truly a decision of a lifetime, we all have to go in with the realization that there is a possibility of death regardless of the skill of our doctors, but we don't have to tread where we don't have faith. (hugs) I know this is a big decision and huge weight on your shoulders right now. I wish you peace in this decision!

Hi Rita, I am stuggling with the decision to have surgery also. I am almost 400lbs and at times my quality of life is terrible. My niece is an RN in North Carolina who has worked in critical care for over 15 years. She now works for a major insurance company and tells me that there are more risks at staying obese than having the surgery. I still am very unsure. I find having my body cut open and modified to an unnatural state as something to be avoided if possible. However, the chance that I could be freed from taking 5 different medications for diabetes and gaining the everyday abilities that others take for granted like walking without getting out of breath or extreme back pain to be worth the risk. My niece told me that if I needed open heart surgery I would be in real trouble. Another niece has had the RNY about a year and a half ago and has lost 150 lbs. She is doing wonderful. I have heard of 2 people who have died from the RNY sugery in the past month but I have met so many people who have a new life because of the surgery. We need to look at our life now and how obesity has taken its toll. Are we really going to lose this weight by going on another diet? What will our life be like in 10 years if we keep on the same path. For me the possibility of death from being morbidly obese is becoming more likely as each year ticks by. I am miserable in my present condition. Ask yourself some of these questions and then make your decison. For me, right now I am in therapy to help me deal with my food addiction. My therapist and I are going to work together using a book by Dr. Phil. I will document this effort over the next 3 or 4 months. At that time I am hoping to have at least lost my fear of the surgery. I believe you will have a good outcome with your surgery. Having a possitive attitude going in to any surgery is important. I am not there yet. Good luck to you. A friend in Oklahoma Michelle