way of topic...

Deb, you just kicked me in the butt and I had to smile!  I have been having a bit of a pity party lately because I am so alone....I was married at 15, so that's all I knew....I was also miserable...I am so loving being alone and not having to deal with the male issues! I hate it because I want to share so many things...It really is better to be alone than in a miserable relationship! I love the freedom I have being alone! No one will control me and I will never be a door mat every again....I am never being a mother to another man!! It is a good thing and a bad thing and it is the BEST thing!
Thanks for the reminder! See how we can be helping one and end up helping everyone!!

Hang in there Pattye. I hope this gives you strength and encouragement!! There is a Prince out there....I'm telling you....My grandma was married 5 times to men who treasured her.....I want to be treasured!! I think she got married the last time in her mid 80's, but was married the 4th time in her 70's, so I'm never giving up on that Prince!!! No matter how long it takes!!  All grandma's guys died, so she moved on to new dance partners...She was nearly married a couple other times but they died to early for her to marry them. She is still my Hero, though she is in heaven! I won't settle for anyone who can't treasure me!! When I am in my 80's I want to be slapping butts and dancing, just like she did in her 90's!!! What a role model!  Be treasured for who you are Pattye!

When you lose a lot of weight, the world is a scary place and eating can help "hide" what is frightening us.  But do you really want to be hidden again in fat?  I don't think you do.

However, that's not what I wanted to say.  What I wanted to say was-think more about what you want than what you don't want-and then make what you want happen.  

 If you WANT to dress and speak in ways that are not pleasing to this man, then continue to do so, lose the man.  I don't think it ever works to try to please someone by being someone that you're not-it doesn't make either of you wrong, just not right for each other.

If you want to stay here, stay, figure out how to make that happen.  Just be clear that it's something that you want, not something you are doing because it's easier than trying to figure out something new.  (hah, the same could be said for relationships too.....) 

 

 

 

Pattye, hun remember the looks we were getting standing outside talking from the cute little guys in scrubs, hmm tell ya something you dont have to be who he wants you to be you have to be who GOD made YOU!  If that means dressing like you want, being online as much as you want, and yes having yet another surgery then you do what is RIGHT for you. And hey I told you I;ll take his type A self anf use his own handcuffs to lock him up and give him a good talking too if you want. Love you and I am here if you need to talk.

Sarah