HELP!!! HUBBY IS FREAKING OUT!!!

So it's finally sunk in to my sweet hubby that I will be having surgery next week and he is freaking smooth out.  I really don't know just what he thinks I've been doing by going to Edmond for the last 7 months. Not to mention that he has been there with me at least half the time. 

Anyway, he's so nervous about something happening to me in surgery or that I'll have a leak or complications.  Which I am nervous too, but not enough to make me not want to do the surgery.

He's a great hubby and very kind and generous, but I had a cancer scare a few years ago and he was traumatized by it.  I came out of the OR and the Dr told him and my Mom (who was dying of cancer at the time) that I did have cancer when in fact I did not.

So any advice would be great and I will be sure and make him read your posts tomorrow!

Thanks my friends!

Jen,

I wish I had the words of wisdom you need to help him relax, but it does say something about how he feels about you that he is worried about you so much. I do hope that he is able to relax and not stress for both of your sake. 

Hubby, try to remember she is doing this so she can be healthy and be with you even longer.

LOL, he may be afraid that I'll soon be able to out run him when he's been a turd!!

Oh Girl this just means he loves you very much. Tell him not to worry you are going to do fine . Tell him to just think about how hot you are going to look when you get skinny and all the fun you two will have. So hubby have postive thoughts this women want to be healthly for her self as well as for you so you two can have a long life together, Arliene

That's so sweet!  Yeah, I've got a keeper!

Jen,

My mother wigged out before my surgery too, actually she wigged all the way up to the surgery and through it, lol. But what helped her the most was coming to support group and listening to the people (I know you live far away and that may be hard for you.) But what also helped her was reading about the facility and Dr. Walton and Dr. B. She was reading articles about how well known they are for their work not only in the USA, but outside of the country as well. That and knowing they have a facility that is a model for the country went a long way in calming a lot of her fears. Dr. B also spoke with her and told her while yes there is a risk with surgery I had a greater risk of diabetes, heart attack, stroke and many other co-morbities. When you factor in the small percentage of folks who actually have compliations from surgery (I have had zero and I am over a month out) it is a very small percentage.

I don't know if any of that will help him or not but the more informed he is the better he will probably feel.

Good luck girl!

Jennifer

Thanks Jen!  I will be sure and share this with him!

Jen~

I know you mentioned to me the PCOS/infertility aspect of things and this being a way for you and your hubby to have the chance to have a family.  If nothing else, please share my story with him.  That way he KNOWS you are doing this not only for you, but for him, for both of you, for your FUTURE.   As for the doctor that lied about the cancer, that sounds like malpractice to me and I'm sorry that your husband is still so traumatized from it.  My family was freaking on me having the surgery, as well.  I did have some complications.  I told them one thing and it still rings loud and clear in my head :  I could die from the surgery, but I'd rather die trying to do something about this weight than die from the weight that I've lived with too long already.  And...  almost 5 years later, you see I'm quite alive and kicking LoL.  So, I hope you're able to ease his nerves and my thoughts are with you!  *hugs*

~ Renae

You are exactly right Renae!  I'm glad you said this because that's exactly what I have told him but it helps to hear it from someone else.  I will be sure and have him read your profile!

I hope your hubby is able to let go of past fears and embrace the future-that is what you are doing with this surgery, planning a better future.  Look ahead, not back.