A male perspective.... viewpoint to debtfree's post... opposite sex attractiveness post-WLS
I have to say I have never had any trouble attracting men, even at 426lbs. Self belief is a really important factor in attraction, if you believe in yourself as beautiful person, if you are fun loving, honest and outgoing, then the men come.....oops probably wrong choice of words there.....oh did I say that.....slap me!
Part of the problem with attraction is that we often have not decided want we want from it, do we want to 'bounce someone's bones' or a relationship? Sometimes we think we want one when we truly want the other and vica versa.
I learnt a long time ago that men have two brains, a primary brain (the relationship brain) and a secondary brain (for bouncing bones). Often men think with their secondary brain. This coupled with the fact that men are dots (everything happens in a single moment in time) and women are lines (everything has to be connected) often makes for confusion on both sides. Hence the need to be honest with ourselves about what we want and then actually tell the other person. I think that means in effect we all really want - dashes (a cross between a line and a dot)!
I hope that all made sense! Oh and I forgot to say thank heavens for secondary brains now and again, and again, and again!
Anne
Part of the problem with attraction is that we often have not decided want we want from it, do we want to 'bounce someone's bones' or a relationship? Sometimes we think we want one when we truly want the other and vica versa.
I learnt a long time ago that men have two brains, a primary brain (the relationship brain) and a secondary brain (for bouncing bones). Often men think with their secondary brain. This coupled with the fact that men are dots (everything happens in a single moment in time) and women are lines (everything has to be connected) often makes for confusion on both sides. Hence the need to be honest with ourselves about what we want and then actually tell the other person. I think that means in effect we all really want - dashes (a cross between a line and a dot)!
I hope that all made sense! Oh and I forgot to say thank heavens for secondary brains now and again, and again, and again!
Anne
10,000 steps walking challenge coordinator to register; http://10000steps.org.au/ and then pm me your email and I will link you to the challenge.
I cannot believe I missed this post....
well here are my thoughts on men, sex, and men
I look at men as I would going to the store and buying fresh fruit. I wouldnt buy a banana or apples if they wer bruised or brown so why would I want a man like that....not...at my heaviest I attracted men not because of my size it was my attitude and personality. I was always up front and I still am. I love men but with that saying I am not going to be with a man just to have one cause that sucks and says I have no self value . I would rather be alone then be with a man just to say hey I have a man I was like this at 18, and now 42. I have never said without a man I am nothing.
For me the size does not matter it is how he acts, walks, talks, its how he shows his self value you his worth. I am not attracted to men that have no self esteem.
The point being for me is simple I am not going to be with a man now or in the future that would not want me when I was heavier..as i have learned with age comes winkles but personality never changes.
T I love ya....thanks for posting this....
well here are my thoughts on men, sex, and men
I look at men as I would going to the store and buying fresh fruit. I wouldnt buy a banana or apples if they wer bruised or brown so why would I want a man like that....not...at my heaviest I attracted men not because of my size it was my attitude and personality. I was always up front and I still am. I love men but with that saying I am not going to be with a man just to have one cause that sucks and says I have no self value . I would rather be alone then be with a man just to say hey I have a man I was like this at 18, and now 42. I have never said without a man I am nothing.
For me the size does not matter it is how he acts, walks, talks, its how he shows his self value you his worth. I am not attracted to men that have no self esteem.
The point being for me is simple I am not going to be with a man now or in the future that would not want me when I was heavier..as i have learned with age comes winkles but personality never changes.
T I love ya....thanks for posting this....
being healthy has its rewards....take the challenge and just do it
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