Question for Today-Holidays-Love Em or Not?

I have issues surrounding the holidays-started out when I was a struggling single parent and just got worse over the years.  My happiest holidays were spent with other holiday loathing friends in Mexico-where we could enjoy the sand and not have to pretend.

But, you can't run forever, and I'm slowly working back into a new version of holidays that incorporates family.  In fact, this year I'm having T-giving dinner at my house-not because I wanted to-but because my Mom wanted it so very much.  So-I said, Ok, but it will be my dinner at my house-not a dinner at my house that you orchestrate....and so far she's holding to that.

So-are the holidays hard for you or do you enjoy them?  If they are hard, do you have a plan for maybe making them better? 

Hi, Debra.
Holidays have been a challenge for me, since the death of my mother. She made holidays such fun, and it's just not the same without her. However, I recognize that my children and grandchildren should not have to suffer for my sadness, so I make a concerted effort to "fake it 'till I make it." Does that make sense? I focus on the family that is still here, and when they're all tucked into bed, I cry, if I need to. Mother would be sad to know that I was sad and not enjoying the holidays, so I try very hard to make them happy times.
It's not about me, anyway. I have much to be thankful for, so Thanksgiving is a wonderful time to focus on our blessings. I love the Savior, so Christmas is a wonderful time to focus on God's gift of love and salvation to us. Family and the reason behind each season--that's my focus.
I hope your Thanksgiving dinner is wonderful, both the food and the fellowship.
Blessings,
Mary

with this being my first year having had surgery it is gonna be really different. We are so used to gathering together for eating, that I dont know how I am gonna handle Christmas. Thanksgiving I believe will be ok.

I am going ot add in more than just the "Big Two" holidays here.  Fourth of July was a big family holiday for us since it is my uncles birthday.  We would get together in the pasture across the street from my grandparents house and have two large flatbed trailers covered in food and drinks.  As many as 80 people, both family and community friends, would show up.  After the death of my granny, my mom and dad took it upon themselves to continue the 4th celebration at their ranch.

Easter is always weiner roasts at the ranch for us.  Since the kids are all grown now, we roast hotdogs over a pit bonfire and just have a good time for a few hours.

Now for the "Big Two".  Thanksgiving has always been a MEH holiday to me.  Yeah the food is good but again after the death of my granny it juts kinda lost it's luster.  Now we just have my immediate family get together and its just not the same anymore.  Everyone knew I was going to have had surgery this year AND they already didnt want to cook anyways so i think we are doing hot dogs LOL.  Ooh the football part of Thanksgiving rocks though.

Christmas is very mixed emotions for me.  Why?  Cause I have never shared it with someone.  I am either single or the "other" is away with her family and I never see her in Christmas morning or Eve.  I do love our family tradition of eating homemade spaghetti and drinking wine though.  It's also fun to see what everyone gets for presents. 

I have basically HATED the big TWO holidays for a number of years - basically since my divorce - I was always having to share my daughter with her father and me being the "nice" parent always let HIM determine how much time he would spend with her over the holidays.  So, I usually just had a quiet dinner with my own family and waited until she was delivered back to us. 

Now she has to share three ways with family - her own, her dads and mine.  Usually we are the "last" family of the day and everyone is tired from the day so it just doesn't do much for me.  I prefer to work on holidays - get the extra pay - yada yada.  Not so much since we just found out we are granted "CLOSED" for the holiday day - darn it!!  But such is life.  We have been on every other holiday this year so it was our turn I guess.

Without a "significant" other in my life, I'll just spend the day quietly with my mom and brother and rest up for the weekend?  I'll probably schedule some OT on Black Friday since I am sure it will be available!  AND I hate Black Friday anyway - will not find me anywhere near stores on that day!

Food doesn't do it for me anymore - just can't enjoy it and don't want to make myself sick by grazing all day so....small plate for me and that's it.  It's weird - this is my 3rd Thanksgiving since surgery and I just don't want any of it!!  Except that darned green bean casserole - hated the stuff before surgery - now I WILL make myself sick on it! 

Talk about round and round thoughts!!  lol...  Ruth

Pffft..Bah Humbug!  This year's Holiday season is gonna suck so hard it blows!!  We have NO family here in TX.  Hubby is in OK.  Money is so tight that Lincoln is crying hysterically for every penny we pinch.  The Christmas decorations are stuffed so far back in the attic bc we had to shove crapola up there to "hide" it for the house showings (ONE so far in 2 months, ugh), that there is no way in hell I can get them out and set up by myself.  Yes, I WOULD like some cheese to go with my whine.  A nice cheese-overload induced bout of constipation would just be stellar.

On the up side (here ya prolly thought I was gonna ***** and moan the whole time, eh?), kids and I are headed up for Thanksgiving to Weatherford to spend time with DH and go house hunting.  We are all headed to the "big city", OKC, for some Black Friday "fun" and a nice dinner.  Hey, at least I can work off a little aggression by throwing an elbow to the lil mean old lady over the last sale something or other I really don't want nor need anyway, right??

Falalalalaaaaaaaaa, la, la, la, pfffffffffffffft.

 Well, since you asked....I'm not a big fan of all the hubub.  About 16 years ago my parents divorced (after being married 34 years).  That meant not only that I would forever question the ability of people to be married for life, but that my family would have to run from one place to the next during the holidays.   Throw in a dad who can't be civil to my mom, no matter what; and a brother traveling in from out of state and it has the potential for disaster.  On the plus side, my mom and in-laws are always very flexible.  

So this is what we do:  Thanksgiving every year without fail Randy and I take the kids and LEAVE TOWN!  Not only do we have a great time away, but it means we only have to deal with the chaos for one holiday.  This year we're taking our 9th trip to WDW and taking my mom.  Her first trip to the "world" ever.  She will be with my brother for Christmas, so this is a great chance for us to spend time with her.  Christmas; we always bite the bullet and make something work.  

There are many years I don't even want to put up the tree, but do it for the kids.  Now that they're getting older, I wonder if they even care.  LOL  I enjoy searching for the perfect gift and the giving.  Even the wrapping is fun to me.  It's running crazy the day of that I can do without.  

Food?  Aw heck.....I'm always too wiped out to think about it.  But I can still have ham or turkey.  Just keep the fudge out of my face or there will be a problem.

Happy Holidays!
Cindy  

Well go stomp on St. Jo and bury him a little deeper....maybe you'll hit oil.

I hope you get some land in Weatherford-I'm trying to cultivate friends with sheep...(I want to train Moonie to herd). 

Me having to deal with more things that poo in my household would be a baaaaaaaa-d idea :-D

St. Joe called, he says hello from Bejing...Yeah, already stomped his tushie a few times, grrr

Hmmmmmm-try putting a stick of incense in the jo hole (NOT JO's hole, but the ground in which he's buried).  Maybe subtle is better in this case.  But in any case, saying Jo Hole was funny......

 

PS:If the incense works you have to buy one goat when you move.