Please tell me what is wrong with me???
Wow - I can't believe you voiced my own feelings! I am also pre-op and I was telling my sister earlier today that I feel guilty over having to leave the kids (I live in another state) to have the surgery. I feel guilty over my job and the money. Guilty because I can not do this on my own. Somehow, when I read your post, I could see more clearly that we are so wasting energy and time with this guilt thing. Let's just hang on to the fact that we will be such better employees, managers, moms, wives, friends, after we do some time on the losers bench. The guilt thing has got to go (speaking to myself, here). We can support each other in this - you may need to remind me of my words one day!
Okay - now that you have that off your chest..... every message that was posted was correct - if you WERE NOT scared to death I would be concerned for you. Yes, your "ramblings" are sound and all of this is very selfish - but isn't it about time for you to be selfish and care for yourself? Who is going to do it for you when you are not well enough to do it? You have to take care of YOU!
You are actually entering into the most wonderful and scary portion of WLS - and it will be okay! Every one of us went through exactly what you are going through - and we have lived to tell about it. So, quit beating yourself up!
Your team will be fine without you, you will be with them in spirit, but I am sure there are competent employees who will pick up the baton and march along where you normally are. Yes, there are others who want to be in the same position - almost to surgery - but it is YOU and not them. Quit worrying about things you cannot change. Worry about things you CAN change - you can ensure that you will live a longer, healthier life for others around you that you care for! You will not have to have them minister and nurse you when you cannot do it for yourself.
The liquid portion will be over before you know it. And if you get stressed about it - that's what we are here for...to moan and groan WITH you because we have been there too!
Hang in there - your life is just about to begin a new phase...take some time to reflect and discover the new person who is begging to get out..... WE'RE HERE FOR YOU!!!
You are actually entering into the most wonderful and scary portion of WLS - and it will be okay! Every one of us went through exactly what you are going through - and we have lived to tell about it. So, quit beating yourself up!
Your team will be fine without you, you will be with them in spirit, but I am sure there are competent employees who will pick up the baton and march along where you normally are. Yes, there are others who want to be in the same position - almost to surgery - but it is YOU and not them. Quit worrying about things you cannot change. Worry about things you CAN change - you can ensure that you will live a longer, healthier life for others around you that you care for! You will not have to have them minister and nurse you when you cannot do it for yourself.
The liquid portion will be over before you know it. And if you get stressed about it - that's what we are here for...to moan and groan WITH you because we have been there too!
Hang in there - your life is just about to begin a new phase...take some time to reflect and discover the new person who is begging to get out..... WE'RE HERE FOR YOU!!!
350/326/173current/159goal
Certified OH Support Group Leader
COURAGE IS NOT THE ABSENCE OF FEAR BUT RATHER
THE ABILITY TO CONTINUE IN THE PRESENCE OF FEAR.
Oh girl! We have all been there done that! I ditto everyone's comments. We all had those feelings. Now is the time to just move forward and try not to give into the feelings. I threatened to run out the door just before they called my name for surgery. Wow, am I glad I didn't chicken out! I can already tell that this is one of the best things I have ever done for myself. Hang in there and we will all scoot down for you.
190 lbs lost
VSG 07/2008
lower body lift 10/2010
upper body lift 11/2011
Wow!! Please don't take this the wrong way...but I sure luv all you guys for the replies. I cried again, but this time a good cry. I really feel like you understand and care. I DO feel soooo much better and even though I am still scared...this too shall pass & I will soon be sitting right next to all you great people on the WONDERFUL loser's bench.
12lbs Lost Pre-Op
"That which doesn't kill us, makes us stronger!!"
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