Hitting the reset button
(deactivated member)
on 7/15/08 10:22 am - VA
on 7/15/08 10:22 am - VA
You should be proud that you did what needed to be done. You took initiative and ended a very unhealthy relationship for you, for her and even for those boys. You don't want them to think that's a standard "normal" relationship.
But, if I can add a little advice, "This is YOUR time! Find out what you want and don't settle for anything else! There's nothing that says you have to jump right into a relationship. Enjoy dating different women (don't become a TRUE harem man,
but enjoy the fun of dating)." Find out what type of person is going to make you truly happy. You know, the whole you have to kiss a lot of frogs before you find a prince theory? Sorry if that's unsolicited, but I think it's good advice (no harm intended!).
But, if I can add a little advice, "This is YOUR time! Find out what you want and don't settle for anything else! There's nothing that says you have to jump right into a relationship. Enjoy dating different women (don't become a TRUE harem man,
but enjoy the fun of dating)." Find out what type of person is going to make you truly happy. You know, the whole you have to kiss a lot of frogs before you find a prince theory? Sorry if that's unsolicited, but I think it's good advice (no harm intended!). 
Mr. Wolf--You know, anyone can pretend to be whatever you are looking for for a LITTLE while, but no one can act perfect forever. Now that you know the real layer beneath, and it is that bad, you are right to back away. Don't be surprised if the "friends" part doesn't work out--some times those folks don't make very good friends, either!
Now, the philosophy--don't you think sometimes us, ahem, "larger" people tend to take waaaayyyy too much, uh, excrement from our romantic relationships? Time to realize we have had all the poop we ever needed in life from people we want to care about us--and we aren't going to take anymore.
Now, concentrate on your harem.
Now, the philosophy--don't you think sometimes us, ahem, "larger" people tend to take waaaayyyy too much, uh, excrement from our romantic relationships? Time to realize we have had all the poop we ever needed in life from people we want to care about us--and we aren't going to take anymore.
Now, concentrate on your harem.
Dan - all I have to say is, good for you! Please be selfish and take very good care of yourself right now - you need that. Finish school, and the rest will all fall into place. You will find that person that is just right for you and when you do, you will know. Congratulations on all your achievements, and focus on you! - Anna
(50 lbs lost pre-op)
I couldn't agree with Deb & Anna more! You need to be focusing on you. With everything you've gone through with WLS and all of the changing (physically, emotionally, etc) that it has caused (remember, we had surgery about 3 days apart..so I am SO there too), YOU are who is important right now. I would venture a guess that you have never focused on you because of your weight...I'm guessing not too many of us even know how...but I believe now is the time to learn. Go back to school, focus on getting that certification and then perhaps you will be ready to attempt a relationship with someone. People do put their best foot forward in the beginning, then when the new wears off..."POOF" they magically return to their real personality ~ sometimes, that's really icky! Been there, done that, and like the rest of these folks, don't recommend it! You've got a good support network here...lean on them and leave the rest to God. He knows what He has for your future! Good luck! ~w
Lost 20 lbs pre-op
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