Anyone have this problem?

I had my surgery 7 weeks ago and am doing great. The only problem I have is with a co-worker who has said several times to people who compliment my weight loss "she cheated." She is overweight but no as much as I was and is trying to lose weight. I don't quite know how to respond to her comments. I don't feel like having surgery was cheating. For me, it was a decision to live a healthier and longer life.

First of all, congratulations on your decision to have WLS. Second, who gives a  fat rat's ass what she says? Sounds to me like a remark of resentment. Don't feel a need to explain your decision to her or anyone else. If the shoe was on her foot , I am willing to bet that she wouldn't consider it as cheating. It isn't cheating. You have just been given a tool and it is ultimately up to you on how you use it. Best of luck to you, Rita

you know that you didn't cheat.  Anyone dealing with someone who has gone through the surgery process or have gone through it themselves know that it's an extremely difficult path to take.  The problem is that there are ignorant people out there that don't understand.  Maybe you could try dealing it with humor and address the person she says it to with something like, it's the most difficult kind of "cheating" you've ever heard of when you have to go several weeks living off nothing but soup broth and jello and live your whole life with the aftermath of surgery.  And end it with something like smiling and say I guess she's just wishing she could "cheat" too and go through all of it as well.  I don't know.  Maybe you could think of something a lot funnier.  (I've never been known for my stand-up!).  But I do know that sometimes using humor or not addressing a situation is the best way of dealing with something like this. But enjoy those compliments!  You know you've worked for them! Diana 

Bless your heart. I know how hurtful that can be. I would suggest some education for your friend ... by saying that it isn't the *easy way* to have major surgery, to have the procedure you had done with all the associated risk, and then have protein and fluid goals that are not easy to make, and eat such small amounts that it makes Weigh****chers look like a free-for-all buffet, not to mention a commitment to daily exercise. Once we have surgery, our weight doesn't just fall off! We have rules to follow and healthy choices to make and exercise to do. None of us had this surgery against our physician's or surgeons advice for our health, but to help our health. This is NOT cheating! ; ) It's an aid, but we still do our part ... (which is more than I ever had to do with Weigh****chers)! ; )

Tell the uneducated big mouth that if she would put as much time into researching WLS as she does in running her mouth then she might know more than what she does. I can not stand people who think they know what a post ops life is like when they have not lived it....Thanks for the post it let me vent..

Pattye, I'm loving you right now....LOL!

This type of stuff really picks my gourd.  I mean come on, do you call this life easy or cheating?  Having to watch everything you eat, throwing up if you eat even one bite too much, not being able to drink and eat at the same time, having to take vitamins the rest of your life, the emotional roller coaster of ketosis and rapid weight loss....I could go on and on.  If anything, she is cheating, cause she is cheating herself out of a much better quality of life.  I love myself now more than i have in years and its only getting better.  As Zig Zigler said in his book See You at the Top, kill the nay-sayer with kindness and show her you are so much better than she is in so many aspects.  That'll shut her up.

Julie,  Think of it this way...that idiot is gonna be a hater....  The list of things she will hate will be far and wide  they are as follows: She will hate: the fact that you will look better than her. the fact that you will draw more men at the company functions. the fact that you will be able to wear underwear that she only dreams of the fact that more of your money is saved by not eating as much the fact that she will find more things to hate because she dislikes herself. the fact that if she decides to do the surgery, she will be too old to enjoy it. the fact that she wishes she could hoola-hoop like you will. Who cares about this person choosing to be a hater?  Your life is worth this decison.  She has no idea how much work this will be for you.  So wear your sexy new figure like it's a badge of pride and rub it in her face.  I hope that you use her hater-style to empower yourself.  I hope you feed off of it and teach her a lesson.  Karma is a ***** and people lie her don't deserve your friendship.  I hope you take the "office stud" for a nooner and she sees you leaving the building......smile all day for me....(don't brush out the sex-hair either....LMAO!!!) Just a few of my thoughts made expressly for you... T.

If you can pull it off, next time she spouts off, smile real big and say "BITTER, aren't we" then toss your head back and laugh.

It's not as high a road as Zig Zigler, but I bet she shuts up.....

edited to add:

Wow, thinking about that really pushes my buttons too, but maybe not as much as it used to.  Someone 7 weeks out of surgery, facing what you've faced and the long road ahead, deserves support, not an office bully.  Really, do the bitter/laughing thing.....if she turns angry (sometimes the mean ones do) just continue to laugh and say "I'll see ya later" and walk off.

The psychology behind this is that YOU control your mood, not gonna let some asswipe bring ya down.  Look at it this way, you had your guts rearranged a few weeks ago-this chick is nothing.

Be prepared for her to start talking about how nasty you've become since you've started losing weight (that's another common theme)...smile and say "not nasty, just assertive...." and walk off again. 

I swear, I almost want to go back into corporate America just so I can do some more walking off now that I've gotten good at it. (almost....not quite...office jerks was a number one pet peeve of mine)